My Sweet Olivia.

Is it love?

Noah had officially asked me to be his girlfriend. And I had no idea how to respond. So, I sealed the deal with a kiss. He intensified it, and our tongues were now massaging each other. He was a great kisser. I had been kissed before, but never this intense. Not even close.

His hands started exploring my body and a jolt of heat lit up my lower abdomen. He let go of me for a quick moment as he turned around to lock the door. His gorgeous blue gaze was set on me, and a smirk curled up in the corner of his lips. His mouth took over mine once again, and my mind started panicking.

There were a bunch of alarms that went off all at once. If I was a twenty-year-old virgin, would he laugh at me? I didn’t have any condoms on me. Did he have any on him? Will he be disappointed that I don’t know how to please him? Does he like bushy v*****s, or does he prefer shaved ones? s**t! This was too much.

“Noah,” I mumbled against his lips.

“Yes?”

“Do you have any condoms on you?”

“A guy never leaves his house without one. And even if I didn’t have any— I’m sure Jason has boxes in here.” He chuckled.

I giggled before admitting to something so intimate. “Noah, I’m still a virgin. Are you okay with being my first one?”

He smiled and kissed the tip of my nose. “Are you f*****g kidding me? I would love to be the first one.”

We were in the same position as the one right now. I was under his well-defined body. His rough and scrapy hands were rubbing my c**t, and his mouth was sucking on my n****e. Back then, I was melting under his touch because I had never been touched before. Tonight, I was melting because he is the only one my body desires. I was a moaning mess our first time, and I am even louder now.

“I will take it slow” were his words then.

“Your p***y is mine” were his words now as he was banging me hard.

“I will not move until your walls adjust to my d**k” he whispered that night.

“Ahh! Your p***y is so warm and soaked,” he is groaning tonight.

My first time was slow, gentle and a bit painful. Tonight’s lovemaking is rough, fast, but very pleasurable.

“Ahh! Noah… I… am”

“c*m for me, Liv. I am about to explode too.”

Our hips were dancing together. I was matching his movements.

“Noah!” I moaned. “Ahh!” We were panting hard.

“s**t! Why can you be this spontaneous all the time? You are usually so dull,” he told me as he kept thrusting in and out of me. Luckily, I had already had my orgasm, or it would have been interrupted by the bullshit that had just come out of his mouth.

A few more thrusts and he came undone. I was just staring at the ceiling, his words had wounded me. Our lives have changed. We were not college students anymore— our responsibilities had changed. We had full-time jobs; we had rent to pay— I had rent to pay, he was living with his parents in their three million-dollar home. I was fighting the tears in the corners of my eyes.

“Do you want to have another round in the shower?” he asked me.

“Can we talk for a second before we do that?”

He rolled his eyes at me and shook his head. When did he become this frivolous and mean?

“Remember I have to get going— make it quick”

“So, this is not new; I have talked to you about it in the past. Would you consider moving in with me?”

He sighed and sat up on the bed. I could tell he was troubled by my question because of the scowl on his face. Rather than facing me, he turned his face to the opposite side of the room. “Yes, you are right, we have talked about this before. Olivia, aren’t we okay with the way we are right now?”

“Noah, initially when we graduated, we talked about moving in together— we have been in a solid relationship for four years. You are one of the reasons I moved here to Northern Virginia.”

“Huh, okay. So, I dragged you here?”

“That is not what I’m saying, Noah.”

“You just said you moved here because of me. Did I ask you to do that for me?” he spat.

He did. I got a flashback of the night he asked me to move to Northern Virginia; he had just made love to me, and I was resting my head on his arm. ‘Liv, why don’t you move up North with me?’ Noah knew my dream was to move to New York and work for Branston Marketing Enterprises. The largest and most profitable marketing company in the industry.

But I didn’t want to go back and forth with him.

“I move here because I am with you and because I love you, Noah”

“How will our relationship change if I move in with you?”

“Well, you just told me that I was dull. Perhaps living together will give me the opportunity to be more spontaneous like you said. Also, you will be living with Amelia and James.”

“I get it now. Are you saying all of this because Amelia and James got engaged?”

Was he being serious right now? I’ve been repeating myself over and over. I am in love with him. I want him to move in with me because I love him. Not because I envied our friends.

“Noah, are you even listening to what I am trying to tell you? I LOVE YOU. I want us to live together because I love you.”

“Do you know how complicated and messy our relationship could become if we started living together? Maybe our relationship has lasted this long because we are better living apart than we could be by living together.”

I walked toward my closet and grabbed my robe. I then collected all of Noah’s clothes off the floor and placed them on the bed. “I think you should go now. You said you had to leave first thing in the morning with your parents.” I gave him a small peck on his forehead and walked myself to the bathroom.

I let out all the pinned up tears I had been holding once I was under the waterfall in my shower. I was not jealous of Amelia and James; all the contrary, I was excited for them. Most of our close friends were either living together with their boyfriends/girlfriends or engaged. We even had a wedding coming up in about three weekends. Our friend Caroline is marrying one of Noah’s cousins. Was I asking for too much? I was not asking him to put a ring on my finger, or to have a child with me— all I was asking was for him to move in with me.

He barely had a couple of outfits in my closet space because he only spends Fridays and Saturdays with me. And that doesn’t happen very often either. Not like before.

I can’t let this get under my skin, I’m sure he will come around. He probably had a bad day at work, and I can’t hold it against him. s**t! I’m having a terrible time at work with Monica too. Maybe he has a Monica in his office as well. We will definitely talk about this another day when I’m more collected.

I showered and went to bed. Tomorrow would be a better day. I’m sure this little argument with Noah will turn out to be a misunderstanding.

****

Waking up in the morning without his warm presence on my bed, on a Saturday, felt depressing. I am yearning for some sense of normality in our relationship. Four years, we have been together for four long years.

Ugh, what can I say? Our beginning was different. We could barely be apart from each other during the day, and when the night came, we always found a way to spend the night together. Once Amelia started dating James, we rotated places. When Amelia stayed with James, then Noah came to spend the night with me at my dorm. And when James came to the dorm, we spent the night at Noah’s rental.

He loved time alone with me. Even after I moved to Alexandria, Noah spent several days with me. He spent weekends, holidays, and even a couple of days throughout the week. What happened to those days?

I got out of bed, threw on a comfortable outfit and went downstairs to watch some TV. I had no plans for the weekend. The only plans I had were to nuzzle myself on his neck and enjoy some quietude before my big presentation on Monday. The argument I had with Noah the night before left me dry and brooding over his unwillingness to move in with me.

The front door opened a couple of hours later and the cute pair of newly engaged lovebirds brought me out of my pondering thoughts. They were f*****g glowing. “Hey, Liv.”

“Aww, hey guys! Did you have fun?”

“It was nice. Why are you sulking on this couch? Where is Noah?” my bfff asked.

Amelia knew me better than I even knew myself. I am like an open book to her, she can read me so easily. I had to ignore her before my dullness took down her glow. “Hmm, I’m glad to have you guys back. I have to run to target to get a couple of things; do you guys need anything?” I had a big lump in my throat. I was not in the mood to speak about anything right now.

They both shook their heads, so I literally ran upstairs to my room and changed into a more acceptable outfit to go out into society. There was a gentle knock on my door. “May I come in?” asked Amelia.

“Sure, what’s up?” I said with a straight face. Something told me that she didn’t come here to add a box of tampons to my shopping list. She walked toward the bed, gave me a sincere look and then, just as I suspected.

“Is everything okay, Olivia?” When she calls me Olivia, she is being serious with me. Kind of when your mom uses her mom's voice.

I am beyond thankful for my best friend. She is my rock, and my refuge when my soul is passing through a storm. However, she is now engaged to my boyfriend's best friend and this could be tricky. “I really don’t want to talk about it right now,” I muttered.

“Olivia Baker! Stop being so stubborn and tell me what’s going on?”

Someone flipped a switch inside my brain because the next thing I knew, I had subconsciously started to cry. I felt the warm tears running down my cheeks. “Aww, come here, Liv” Amelia told me as she enveloped me in her arms. It took me a few minutes before I could speak; my voice was a crack on an eggshell, but I managed to tell her everything that happened between Noah and me.

Even the dull part. Which was the worst.

“I am so sorry, Liv. Please don’t let this discourage you.”

I brushed the tears off my face and took her hands between mine. “Amelia, promise me that you will not tell any of this to James— you know he is best friends with Noah,” I begged her.

“And you are my best friend, I would never jeopardize our friendship like that,” she told me before she hugged me again. “I have an idea. Why don’t we go shopping for a new outfit? You need to look confident and powerful on Monday.”

I smiled. “I love you Amelia.”

"And I love you."

But wait! How I am supposed to take her away from James, they are newly engaged. I feel terrible. “Why don’t you stay here with James? I will go by myself.”

“It’s okay, we don’t have any plans.” She took my hand and led me downstairs. “Honey, is it okay if I go to the store with Liv? She needs a new outfit for her presentation on Monday.” She wiggled her eyebrows before continuing. “Unless you want to come along.”

“Where is Noah?” he asked with a confused face. Isn’t he his best friend? He should know he is away, shouldn’t he?

“He went to New York with his parents. He didn’t tell you?”

He was quiet and thoughtful for a good minute before he answered my question, “I must have forgotten about it. We have a ton of work, he may have mentioned it while we were working on something.” He was now putting on his shoes. “Okay, I will go, but first I need to make one quick stop by the office. I forgot a file that I need to prepare for Monday morning.”

Noah’s parents own one of the biggest construction companies in the State of Virginia. Their residential side builds new subdivisions, and their commercial side works for the government. They build major city projects. Last time I spoke to Noah about work, they were building a brand-new Veteran’s hospital.

“Yay! Thank you honey” said Amelia’s squeaky voice.

James and Noah are engineers, and they work for the commercial side of the company. One is a civil Engineer, and the other one is a Structural Engineer. James' father and Mrs. Mayers oversee the residential part of the company. Altogether, they must employ about one thousand employees or so. If not more than that. Their headquarters’ office is a ten-story building, and it’s located in Tyson’s Corner.

Our drive wasn’t that long— it took us less than thirty minutes to get there. James updated us on the hospital building progress as he piloted the car. “Honey, we will wait for you here in the car,” said Amelia, once we arrived.

“No, come with me. I would like to show you both a miniature construction model that I am working on for a stadium that we will build next year.”

“A stadium?” questioned Amelia.

“Yes, the city will build a stadium for The Youth Empower Club.”

I had no idea who they were, but I was kind of curious. I also thought about sneaking into Noah's office to leave him a little note. “Let’s go, Meli. I want to see it.”

James led the way and took us to the 9th floor. That is where the commercial team has their offices. There were a few people working on a Saturday. It does indicate that they have a lot of work.

“Hey James, are you here to help us?” asked one of the guys working there.

“Wait, what is James doing here?” asked a female voice. I heard some footsteps and the next thing I knew, it was Mr. and Mrs. Myers who came to talk to James.

“The man of the hour!” he shouted. “I heard you got engaged last night. Congratulations!” said Mrs. Myers, pulling James for a hug. “Where is the bride to be?” she asked as she narrowed her eyes between Amelia and me. They probably recognized me, because she approached Amelia and hugged her.

“I will pay for your honeymoon. Just make sure you don’t wait too long, or I will forget I told you this,” she chuckled. It was now her husband's turn to congratulate the engaged couple.

Some of the workers were clapping and celebrating James in the background. Meanwhile, I was thinking about why Mr. and Mrs. Myers here? Shouldn't they be heading to New York with Noah?

“Ahem,” Amelia cleared her throat and linked her arm with mine. I had no idea that Mr. Myers had just asked me something. I was too busy trying to figure out why they were standing in front of me and Noah wasn't with them.

“I’m sorry, what was that?” I asked with a fake smile on my face.

“When are you and Noah taking the next step?” he asked again. This time I heard him loud and clear.

I froze. Mr. Myers, your son won’t even move in with me. What step are you talking about? — I wanted to tell him that, but I opted for something less defeating. “Whenever he is ready. I guess,” I said with an involuntary grin on my face. I would have married him two years ago, but right now I am uncertain that it will ever happen. Not based on what Noah told me last night.

“Well, I am here to show the ladies something. Don’t work too hard,” said James before walking away.

“It was nice seeing you, Mr. and Mrs. Myers,” I told them.

“Likewise, young lady.”

And just like that, the rest of the weekend was foggy for me.