Hard choices

The aftermath

I sat my bag down and try explaining the situation to my mother but as usual before hearing my side of the story she has already made up her mind.

"Is this the way I've raised you?" She shouted. As she raised her hand to slap me I run out of the house to the side gate and climb up onto the roof, I sit there sing and humming to myself pondering the events of the day hoping at the same time that my dad would get home early today. Somewhere along the way I must have drifted off because as I open my eyes the sun has disappeared and dad's car is pulling in to the yard I smile and climb down swiftly, rushing to meet him knowing he will save me from mother's wrath.

After supper I go to bed yet all I think about is those eyes that seem to have captured my attention, even with all my worries all I can think about is those eyes. I lay in bed hoping that I can bump into him again tomorrow hoping that things will change now that I want to be his friend.... I wonder if this feeling is more than a want for friendship but in the end I have to ask is this for me is there even such a possibility for someone not Indian enough in this thoroughbred Indian community! I have never ever had interest in staying here forever but what if I could make friends with them not just for show but real friends I will just have to see as time goes by what this shitty place might hold for me, would it be enough to make this place less shitty in my opinion I drift off to sleep deep in thought and these thoughts turn onto dreams of possibilities but those are just dreams right!

In the morning I get ready for school feeling rather excited with some sort of newly formed confidence and feeling as though nothing could break my spirits today. I arrived at school just as the bell rang and the morning was a blur right up until 1st lunch break. I took my lunch and where I would normally go and hide in the girls locker room today my feet had a mind of its own and walked towards the soccer field where Cassim and his friends played ball every break. I quietly found myself a place on the Pavillion where I sat and watched them choose their sides and start their game, I ate my lunch in peace and watched until the bell rang for classes to resume so I packed my lunch bag and ran to class. We had Quraan recital my favourite subject and I felt so happy that I had an awesome break outside for a change followed by my favourite class and so far my day was without incedent. I paid attention to detail in all my classes right up to the class before 2nd break when the goon squad decided to pester, threaten and irritate me causing my anger to get the better of me resulting in me shouting out loud at them disrupting the entire class and since he was the sirs pet no matter how I explained i would be punished so I decided to save myself some humiliation at accept whatever he was going to say without protest.

As I stand outside the class for all to see my blood is boiling and if it were possible one look and you would see the steam coming out of my ears.

"Why are you outside the class?" the principal's voice boomed threw the hall.

I looked up at him and opened my mouth but then closed it again just as fast because i decided that saying anything would not change my situation but rather it might just make it worse.

"This is truly disappointing, although I don't know why I expected anything different from the likes of you" he scoffed. I ran off like a monkey

with my tail between my legs straight towards the bathroom with tears clouding my eyes when I bumped into something or rather someone. Due to the tears threatening to fall I don't look up until I feel hands on my shoulders lifting me up.

"This seems to be a new habit for us" says a voice I recognise, the voice that played over and over in my mind and even occupied my dreams last night.

Looking up at him with my tear filled eyes holding all the tears that I am trying to hold back. I whisper another thank you before I run passed him straight into the bathroom, dropping to the ground I let my tears fall as I hug my knees to my chest for the balance of the thirty minutes. The bell rings marking the start of second break so I go out wash my face and head to the classroom to gather my things. After which I find myself back at the soccer field as I approach I notice that there is a discussion going on so I eves dropped and hears that they are short a player. What came over me and where I found the courage in that moment I don't know but I say "I can play". The guys turn to look at me as though I've grown two heads and that's when one who I am assuming to be Cassims best friend Jamal ask "what did you say", and so I repeat myself more confidently adding that it can't hurt since of they short a player they won't be able to play and so after listening eto my reasoning they hesitantly agree and the two team captains start choosing at to my surprise i get chosen by Cassim before all the players are chosen.

We play and the guys seem to think I'm not to bad since they have now started marking me since I have helped score two goals putting our team in the lead.

After the game I seem to have made friends with the guys and start walking back to class when we are stopped by Zidaan and crew, he takes out a bottle from his bag and throws its contents over me making Cassim react by punching him straight in the face...

Guess what now we are all on the way to the office once again for the same drama only this time I don't care what they say because i am no longer alone....

Sorry for the delay in updates I will try my best to update more often....