Betrayal - The Matlock Pack: Book Two

Chapter 17 - Bells

Wednesday 3 February

~*Bells*~

“Son of a b***h!”

A heavy thud reverberated as Owen landed on his back. I had swept my leg out to take him down in our sparring session and, unfortunately for him, it had worked a little too well.

Feeling the corners of my lips threatening to turn up, I offered a hand to haul him to his feet. He lay on the mat for about a minute, sucking in air to fill his lungs before he grabbed my hand.

“You want to take a couple of minutes?” I scratched my chin and watched him stumble as he tried to regain his balance.

He put his hands on his knees, leaned forward, and continued gulping air into his lungs. Shaking his head, he coughed once, then grunted. “Maybe.”

“Okay.” I left him to his own thoughts and went to my bag to grab my bottle of water. I took my time drinking, letting my mind wander.

The attack at Building Two had kicked my survival instincts back into high gear. Kadin’s presence throughout the incident strangely helped me confront the demons that had been haunting me since my first confrontation with Tatum. It was almost like I wasn’t alone anymore in my terror, which was oddly comforting.

Murph had needed to talk out his perspective of the incident a few times over that weekend. It turned out that it had reminded him of something similar that had happened to him when he was younger and living with his birth parents. The more he talked, the calmer he became, until he was back to his usual self by Sunday night.

It made me realise how many demons we all have and how I’d been wallowing in my own misery for so long. Too long. When the next sparring session with Owen came around the following Monday morning, I decided to push my multitude of issues down as deep as I could stuff them and start getting serious again about my training.

Of course, Owen took responsibility for the change in my mindset, crowing about his little pep-talk at the bar the prior Friday to both Murph and me every chance he got. He knew that something had happened at Building Two, but not what or who had been involved. Kadin, Murph and I had kept our involvement relatively to ourselves, but we couldn’t stop the rumours from spreading, especially once everyone saw the temporary fix to the window the next morning.

I had to admit that Kadin surprised me when she kept it to herself. I was used to her telling her two besties everything, but it seemed that Rowan knew almost nothing about it when we all returned to class on Monday. Although Owen had taken immense delight in explaining, in entirely far too much detail, everything he had got up to with Briar over the weekend, he had only spoken of the rumours he’d overheard about what had happened to the window, nothing about Briar knowing anything.

Once the excitement of the rumour mill had died down, the week went by rather quickly. I still wasn’t sleeping for longer than two or three hours every night, but the amount of effort I was putting in every sparring session meant I was exhausting myself enough that I was out solidly for those two or three hours.

So, of course, I threw myself even further into physical training. I boxed up all those lingering feelings of inadequacy and focused on things I used to be good at it. It couldn’t hurt, could it?

As much as Owen rejoiced about me ‘returning to the land of the living’, he regretted it at this very moment. This was the second morning in a row that I had bested him, and I could tell that he was getting frustrated.

I smirked to myself as I put my bottle back into my bag. Be careful what you wish for, Owen. You just might get it.

I turned back to see him standing a little taller in the middle of the mat. “You ready to go again?”

He nodded, even though he was grimacing. He curled his fingers to me. “Brint it on, cunt.”

My lips finally released the smile that had been threatening all morning. I must have looked a little too eager, because Owen visibly flinched. I cracked my knuckles as I walked back to the mat. “Oh, it’s on.”

“Oh, s**t…” Owen took a step back, but couldn’t move out of my way fast enough. Within seconds, he was on his back again with another audible ‘oof’.

“Had enough yet?” I looked down at him with my hands on my hips.

He glared at me. “Not by a f*****g long shot.”

I grinned. “Good. Get up. Let’s go again.” I stepped back enough to let him climb to his feet on his own, grumbling about ‘d***s being arseholes’.

Crouching into a defensive posture, I waited for him to make the first move. He sized me up and decided to take things in a new direction.

“So… You and Kadin, huh?” He stepped forward and swung a right fist to my jaw. “Back together again?”

I dodged and responded with a left jab to his gut. “What on earth are you on about now?”

“Jesus Christ, man, will you at least try to pull your punches?” He massaged his torso where I’d landed my fist. “Rumour has it that you and Kadin are back together.” He threw his foot out to sweep me.

I jumped his sweep, then barrelled into him with my shoulder to push him back. “Really.” I grunted when I felt his fists land on my back in an attempt to make me let him go. It worked; I released him and took a step back. “Who, pray tell, told you that?”

“You know what the local rumour mill’s like, Bells. They see two people of the opposite s*x talking; they automatically assume it means they’re dating.” He advanced on me, his eyes calculating where to attack next. He threw a wide right cross that I dodged easily.

“Watch your telegraphing, Owen. I saw that coming a mile away.” I leaned in and landed a left uppercut so hard I could hear his teeth rattle. “They can keep talking. We’re just friends.”

“Right…”

He obviously didn’t believe me, but I honestly didn’t give a s**t. Kadin and I had talked a little bit last week after the incident and I was amazed at how much easier I found talking to her compared to last year. There was a vulnerability to her I hadn’t seen before and, strangely, it made her much more likable. She had told me she was taking care of her brother after some sort of family dispute, but didn’t really elaborate too much.

After shaking his head to get his wits back after my uppercut, Owen advanced on me again. “So, you haven’t f****d Kadin to get over your obsession with Nat, then?”

I faulted when he brought up Nat and he took full advantage, landing a right jab to my jaw that sent me stumbling back. “I haven’t slept with Kadin, Owen.” Hurriedly bringing my fists up to block his moves, I tried to land a left cross to his midsection, but he danced out of the way.

“But you are still obsessed with one Nat Saito?” He raised an eyebrow at me and hit me with a left hook to my chest, then followed it up with a roundhouse sweep that had me on my back. He followed me down and clambered over me to force me to tap out.

I growled and fought the pin, both mentally and physically. Snippets of memory flashed through my mind, and soon I was seeing Owen morph into Tatum. As soon as the vision of Tatum started to materialise, I began fighting like a wildcat; flailing, biting, and scratching anything I could get my hands on.

“f**k!”

I felt the heavy weight that had me pinned down lift, but it didn’t stop me from snarling at my attacker; my vision coated in a red haze. I followed the shadowy figure of Tatum across the mat, grabbing at any part of him I could get, trying desperately to hold him down so I could destroy him.

“Bells! It’s me, man. It’s Owen!”

The words didn’t make any sense coming out of Tatum’s mouth. It had to be a trick, so I kept up my attack. He wouldn’t live to hurt me again. He wouldn’t get a chance to hurt anyone ever again.

Arms wrapped firmly around my chest, pulling me away from Tatum and throwing us across the mat. Electricity sparked up my arms and into my shoulders before it started to disappear. A tiny zap continued its way past my shoulders, through my chest before landing in my heart, shocking me out of the rage mist overwhelming me. Hands were still wrapped around my chest, pinning my arms to my side so I couldn’t move, legs enveloping my thighs to make sure I couldn’t get up.

But I could feel.

My body tensed when it realised who had hold of me. My skin pulsed wherever it met the skin of the person who had wrapped themselves around me.

Nat.

“Come back to us, Bells,” she muttered into my ear urgently, still holding me firm, not giving me a millimetre of free movement. “You’re safe. He’s not here.” I felt her head move behind me before bringing her mouth closer to my ear. “Breathe, Bells.”

“Nat?” I whispered, still a little unsure of what was going on.

“Breathe with me, Bells.” I felt a breath against my ear as she exhaled. “In for three.” I felt a hint of wind brush past my earlobe as she inhaled. I followed her order, breathing in alongside her, willing my body to relax, safe in the knowledge that Nat wouldn’t do anything bad to me. She was my safe space. “Out for three.” I exhaled noisily as her arms began slowly loosening.

We both kept up the breathing exercise for two or three more cycles before she let go completely and rolled away from me. I lay on the mat on my side and let my head drop to the mat, suddenly feeling very vulnerable. My knees curled up in front of me as I held my hands to my chest.

“Bells?”

Kadin’s face filled my vision, her eyes filled with concern. She reached out a palm and lay it softly on my cheek. Her thumb brushed my cheekbone. She looked at someone or something behind me for a moment, then returned her gaze to mine.

I shut my eyes tight and let out a ragged breath as the events over the past few minutes came back to me. “Oh, Goddess… Owen… What have I done?” I could feel panicked tension take over my limbs as I began shaking.

“He’s okay, Bells. It’s okay.” Kadin’s thumb kept gently brushing my cheekbone. “Everything’s okay.”

“Come on, Bells. Let’s get you up.”

I opened my eyes to see Casey’s hand hovering in my field of vision. Grimacing, I grabbed it and he lifted me to my feet. I kept my focus on the mat and wrapped my arms around myself to stop them from trembling.

Standing a foot in front of me, Casey looked up into my eyes with just as much concern as Kadin did, now that she was standing behind Casey. He glanced behind me quickly, then back at me. “You okay?”

I blinked. “I… Uh… I don’t know…” Guilt rushed through my body. “Owen? Is he okay? I didn’t hurt him, did I? Please tell me I didn’t hurt him…”

Casey looked behind me once more, a slight frown forming between his eyebrows. “He’ll be fine.”

“Oh, Goddess…” My legs went out from under me as the world spun around me.

Casey dove forward and grabbed my upper arms to keep me upright. “Hey, it’s okay. It was an accident, that’s all.” He led me over to a bench and settled me before he sat on his haunches in front of me. “Talk to me. Tell me what happened.”

Slowly, I shook my head in denial. “I thought he was Tatum…” I whispered, looking into Casey’s eyes. “I can’t stop seeing him, Casey. He’s everywhere.” I gulped. “I thought I was getting better.”

I could see the wheels turning in Casey’s mind as he took a slow, deep breath in before letting it out gradually. “It’s been a while, hasn’t it?”

I nodded despondently, only now realising how far up against my ears my shoulders were. I forced them down, but it was a struggle.

He sighed, then got up and sat down next to me. “It takes time, Bells. To work through things that mess with your mind.” He draped an arm across my shoulders. “Trust me. I've been there.”

I let out an amused huff, but kept my eyes on the ground in front of me.

“Here’s what I know. You’re getting back into the swing of things fighting wise. We can all see the progress you’ve made over the past week.” He patted me on the shoulder. “But there’s more work to be done before you’re settled.”

I sniffed. “Yeah…”

“I’d normally tell you to book some meditation sessions with Kennedy, but he’s been flat out with his Beta duties recently.” He looked out across the field in front of us. “What about if I work with you instead? See if we can focus you a bit more.”

I frowned. “Do you have the time for that? It’s not only Kennedy that’s busy with a new role.”

Casey turned to face me. “I’ll make the time, if you do.”

Breathing slowly, I kept my eyes on his as I thought about what he was saying. I could tell by his tone that it was either do what he was suggesting or be reprimanded over what I did to Owen. Remarkably, Casey wasn’t pissed at me, but he did need to inflict some disciplinary action on me for what I’d done. I knew I had to take his offer. “Okay. When do we start?”

He smiled. “How about seven tonight? My office?”

“Okay,” I mumbled.

“Good.” Casey patted me on the back. “I’ll see you then.” He stood up, looked at the mats in front of us, and stretched. “Let’s get back to it, yeah?”

I grunted unenthusiastically but rose and followed him to the mat I’d abandoned a little while prior.

“There’s only a couple of minutes left before lunch, but let’s team you up with Nat. She’ll be able to take you.” He walked away from me, over the mats and headed for Nat, who was standing next to her bag drinking water and talking to Kadin.

I slowed to a stop at his words. Of all the people he could have chosen to have me spar with, why’d he have to pick her? I watched Casey talk to her and saw her eyes flick towards me before resettling on Casey. She shrugged, then nodded and dropped her water into her bag.

They walked back to where I’d frozen in place. Casey moved to the edge of the mat and motioned for us to begin.

Blinking furiously, I lifted my hands in a defensive posture to wait on Nat. I tried to settle my mind enough to think clearly about what we were about to do, but my heart was pounding heavily with unease and tension. My thoughts veered wildly between the desire to be closer to her and the pain at the look of disdain on her face when she looked at me.

I thought I’d start the mini spar by trying to talk to her. “Thank you for your help earlier.”

She raised an eyebrow, but remained silent, before going straight into a one-two-three combo aimed at my torso. I blocked as best I could, but she didn’t let up, following through with a roundhouse kick that I barely dodged.

She wasn’t showing an ounce of mercy in her attack, letting out all her aggression on me.

I was barely surviving, and she knew it.

“I’m sorry, Nat.” Block, dodge, parry. “For everything.”

She glared at me and threw a right hook at me that grazed my chin.

“I understand why you hate me.” Block, block, jump. Holy f**k, she was fast.

A deep frown lined her forehead before she tried another combo set at my torso that I barely dodged.

I panted from the exertion of trying to evade her. “What can I do so we can at least be friends again?”

She released a raw breath and hurled a devastating right uppercut at my chin, sending me flying backwards.

I landed heavily on my back and looked up at her standing over me, utter hopelessness filling my soul while the air left my lungs.

She stared down at me with steady eyes, her fists trembling at her side in rage. “Nothing.” She pivoted and stormed off the mat, leaving me wheezing.

Casey coughed nervously, dragging my devastated attention his way.

“I think we can safely call that time for lunch, hey Bells?”