The Ones She Left Behind

Chapter Eight

Maggie stared at her reflection in the full-length mirror before her while she applied her make-up.  She applied smoky eye shadow, mascara, blush, and the usual ice pink lip gloss.

Topher had said she was most beautiful when she didn’t wear make-up, and she believed him. However, hiding behind make-up was her plan for surviving high school. This way, she didn’t have to worry about the questions that would arise if anyone saw her scars. She needed to let go of her past, especially now that Topher was gone, but it would be impossible if people continuously brought up her scars.

Typically, Maggie wouldn’t need to worry so much about her appearance on a Saturday, but Lewis had called her earlier that day and asked if they could go on a proper date. She wasn’t in the mood to go on another date after all that had happened, but she also didn’t want to hurt his feelings. After all, whether he knew it or not, what happened on their first date was partially her fault.

 “So, how do I look?”

She froze. No one was there to answer that question anymore.

Fighting back tears, she grabbed her purse and headed downstairs. Lewis would be there soon, and she didn’t have time to redo her make-up if she started crying now.

The doorbell rang. She greeted him moments later, and his smile instantly warmed her heart. It only lasted a moment, however, before guilt set back in.

“Hey purdy lady, ready to go?”

She nodded, unable to ignore the sick feeling in her gut. She was about to go on her first date alone with Lewis, and now Topher wouldn’t be there to protect her should anything go wrong. She was certain Lewis was good, but having Topher there would’ve assured her that nothing bad would ever happen to her.

He took her to a small diner, and she studied the menu. Chicken parmesan. Fried chicken. Meatloaf. Cheeseburger. Ribs. Baked ham. Chicken sandwich. Meatball sub. Ham and cheese sub. Spaghetti and meatballs. Chicken sub. Cheeseburger sub. Pork.

“Um, is there anything that doesn’t have meat?” she asked Lewis.

He skimmed the menu. “You can probably get spaghetti without meatballs or get a salad without meat. Don’t you like meat?”

She shook her head, her cheeks heating up. “I’m a vegetarian.”

His eyes lit up. “Wow. I would’ve never guessed.”

“It’s not something most people know about me,” she said. “Even my aunt doesn’t.”

His cheeks turned red. “So, this is probably a dumb question, but—“

Maggie laughed, cutting him off. “It’s okay. People eat meat in front of me all the time. Eat what you want. It won’t bother me.”

Maggie ordered spaghetti without meat. She did her best to ignore the smell coming from Lewis’ pork, but she didn’t have to worry about it too much given how fast he ate it.

She stared down at her food, letting her thoughts drift back to Topher. Where was he? What was he doing? Her stomach twisted into a knot. What if he found someone else to protect?

Her mind drifted to the human Topher she saw in the obituary. What had been his favorite food? Did he love meat as much as Lewis apparently did, or was he more like her? She had always been an open book—she told him everything. The more she thought about it, the more she realized just how little she had known about him. If he had tried to protect his mother from his father, she realized he must’ve been close to his mother, but very rarely did Topher ever mention her, and she couldn’t remember if he said anything about his father. Similarly, unless she was slipping into the darkness, she never talked about hers, either.

Then again, Topher wasn’t one to talk about himself. Anytime she had asked about his family, he usually brushed it off. Granted, knowing what she knew now she could hardly blame him for not wanting to divulge any details.

She sighed.

Lewis looked at her. “Is something wrong? You don’t look like you’re having much fun.”

She blinked up at him. “It’s nothing. It’s just . . . “ She sighed again. “My best friend and I got in a fight.”

“You still keep in contact with friends back home?”

She nodded. “He and I were talking, and I told him to leave me alone, so now he is. I can’t get him to talk to me anymore.”

He frowned. “Well, that doesn’t sound like a very good friend.”

Maggie felt a twinge of pain as if he had just punched her in the stomach. “He’s the best friend I’ve ever had. It’s my fault for pushing him away. I’m trying to apologize, but he won’t answer me.”

Lewis clasped his hand over hers. “It’s okay, Maggie. You’re making plenty of new friends here. Maybe you should just cut your losses.”

She forced a smile. “Maybe.”

They finished their meals, talking about whatever random things came to their mind. But, when Maggie tried to remember what they talked about later, she honestly couldn’t remember.

All she remembered was Topher wouldn’t leave her mind.

After dinner, they climbed into Lewis' truck and he drove them around. He had told her there was one other place he wanted to show her before the night was over.

He drove up an old dirt path that was overgrown with branches and covered in leaves and fallen tree limbs. Given all the bumps, she figured he must’ve had four-wheel drive.

He came to a halt in front of a group of trees. The sun was setting, but Maggie could see beyond the trees was a large pond.

“Perfect fishing hole,” he commented, getting out. “Everyone around here knows where this place is, so if you’re going to live here you need to know, too.”

She tried to smile as she followed him. “Don’t tell me we’re in a cheesy horror movie and we’re going fishing for dead bodies, not fish.”

He chuckled. “Not to my knowledge, but after what happened last night I don’t think much would surprise me now.”

Maggie bit her lip. “By the way, how are you? I know it got pretty bad last night.”

He shrugged. “Nothing serious. A couple bruises, but I’ll live. I suffered worse when I fell off a dirt bike two years ago.”

“I’ve suffered worse, too.” Maggie froze. She hadn’t meant to say that out loud. When he looked at her, she quickly said, “I was such a klutz when I was little. I can’t tell you how many times I tripped over my own two feet.”

The setting sun was illuminated by the lake water. Maggie stared down at it, mesmerized.

“I bet this would be pretty when it snows,” she said. “It would be fun for ice skating.”

“Or ice fishing.”

She rolled her eyes. “Do you hunt, too?”

He hesitated, but then he nodded. “Is that going to be a problem?”

She shook her head. “Not as long as you don’t tell me when you do it so I can pretend I don’t have a clue. You can just tell me you’re going to a strip club instead.”

He chuckled. “You’re all right for a vegetarian. I thought all vegetarians stood outside people’s homes holding protest signs while they eat dinner.”

She shook her head. “I have other things to worry about.” She fidgeted with her hands. “So, are you interested in anything other than killing innocent animals?”

He chuckled and poked her in the side, causing her muscles to tense. “I’m interested in a certain Hawaiian vegetarian princess.”

Her cheeks heated up. “You know what I mean.”

He shrugged. “I don’t know. I like working on cars. I’ll probably go to a trade school someday to become a mechanic.”

She nodded. Reasonable enough.

“What about you?”

“I like astronomy,” she answered. “I could never afford a telescope or anything, but I’ve been fascinated by stars since I was a little girl.”

Especially ever since I made a wish on one and a little boy appeared through my window.

She shook the thought away. She had to stop thinking about Topher. She had to move on.

It was all she really could do.

“Stars are cool,” Lewis said, snapping her back to reality. “I made a wish on one once that I would grow up to be a stud. Now look at me.”

Maggie laughed. “Conceited much?”

He shrugged. “Just stating the facts.”

“So is that all there is to do around here? Hunt, fish, and get drunk?”

He shrugged. “Pretty much. Oh, and there’s also church on Sunday mornings. We basically go to ask for forgiveness for the sins we commit the rest of the week.”

She shook her head, but the smallest hint of a smile crossed her face.

Lewis turned to her again, looking her directly in the eyes. She thought about what would normally happen on a date, and what happened the night before. They would typically lose themselves in each other’s eyes as they leaned in, capturing the other in a passionate kiss. She wanted to experience that again, but then she remembered Topher and how he lost control while watching them kissing. Something was definitely wrong with Topher, and as much as she hated to admit it, she knew she wouldn’t be able to move on until she knew why he lost control.

“It’s getting late. I think we should head back now.”

He snickered. “I guess we wouldn’t want your aunt calling the police, would we?”

She forced a smile, following him over to his truck. Somehow, she doubted if Lani would care if she came back at all.

When they got back to her house, Maggie unbuckled her seatbelt and turned to Lewis.

“I hope this was a better first date,” he said.

She smiled. “I’d have to say yes, though it wasn’t your fault the technical first one sucked.”

“I guess not.”

As Maggie got out of the truck, she heard the driver’s side door open. Butterflies filled her stomach as she knew what would probably happen next.

He walked her to the door. Maggie took small, tentative steps. It wouldn’t be their first kiss, but she felt even more nervous this time. When they reached the front door, Maggie looked everywhere except at Lewis until he cupped her chin and leaned toward her. Maggie closed her eyes, and when contact was made, she tensed momentarily before relaxing.

When he pulled away, Maggie realized something. She felt nothing. There were no more butterflies, no yearning for more. Maybe it was from the guilt, she thought. Maybe that was preventing her from enjoying this moment.

“So, I’ll see you at school?”

Maggie nodded, forcing a smile. “See you then.”

Heading inside, Maggie noticed Lani's car and another car were in the driveway. Opening the front door, she found all the lights on but no one in sight.

On the kitchen table were several empty bottles. Muffled voices carried through the house. Even when Maggie went downstairs to her room she still heard them. The voices turned into moans. Having heard enough, she turned on her stereo to drown them out. Immediately, Avril Lavigne blasted through the house. She hoped Lani and her friend heard it and realized she was home.

Not that they would probably care.

___________________________________________________________________________

That night, Maggie lay awake, afraid to fall asleep, afraid of the nightmares that awaited her. The noises from Lani’s room had long stopped, but it didn’t matter.

She imagined Topher, sitting beside her on the bed, his smile usually the last thing she saw before sleep took over her. She never realized until now just how comforting his presence had been.

She eventually drifted off, almost by force. What felt like hands pressed against her face.

Maggie stood in a meadow. The sky was calm and the brightest blue she had ever seen.

Nightmares didn’t usually start like this.

A figure stood before her. She assumed by the rigid exterior it was a guy. His back was to her, but he seemed calm.

“Where am I?” Her voice came out as a squeak.

His back stiffened. He turned to her, and the second she saw his silver eyes, her heart lurched. The man standing before her appeared several years older than the Topher she knew. His brown hair was still shaggy, but he now seemed to be at least six feet tall. Despite the brooding expression, his eyes were the same eyes she had stared into countless times.

“T-Topher?”

His eyes hardened. “How did you get here?”

Her eyebrows scrunched in confusion. Part of her had thought he would’ve been happier to see her. “Topher, I’m so sorry about what I said. Can you please forgive me and come home? Please? I promise I’ll never take you for granted again.”

He shook his head. “It’s too late, Maggie.”

“Don’t say that!” She rushed over to him, flinging herself against him.

For the first time, she could touch him and actually feel him. He felt warm, almost alive.

Instead of returning her embrace, he pulled away from her. “I’m sorry, Maggie, but you made your decision. You have to go back.”

Darcy watched as Maggie squirmed and panted in her sleep. Her hands were pressed against either side of Maggie’s head as she concentrated all of her energy on her experiment.

In the time she had spent looking for Topher within the last day, she had come to realize something. As close as she and Topher were, the person who had his heart was her sister, and Darcy knew that Maggie loved him as well, even if she wouldn’t admit it. The love they felt for each other would make it easier for Maggie to reach him than Darcy, and Darcy was determined to prove it.

 “Topher . . . please . . .” Maggie murmured.

Slowly, Darcy dropped her hands as she felt Maggie returning to herself. While she had no means of spying on their reunion, Maggie’s murmurs were all the confirmation she needed that Maggie was able to reach him.

Now, all she needed was the right opportunity to put her bigger plan into action.