Inside a Nerd's Mind

Yesterday's Problems, Today's Solution

I heard a noise.

“Ring ring!” it said.

I didn’t want to move; I was still sleepy.

“Ring ring ring ring!” It still said loudly.

I covered my ears with my pillows and turned to the other side of the bed, facing the window.

“Ring ring ring ring ring ring!” it said loudly as ever and faster.

I was at the edge of standing up and destroying the thing when it stopped.

I was relieved.

“Ah! Finally, I can sleep with peace at last.” I said to myself.

I closed my eyes only to hear that same damn noise all over again after 5 minutes.

“Ring ring!” It said again.

By this time, I am pushing my pillows to my ears that I can almost crush my head to death.

“Ring ring ring ring!” It repeated.

I HAD ENOUGH!

“What is that!” I screamed in my mind.

I turned over and saw my watch. I then realized that it was my alarm that I set a night ago.

I grabbed it and looked at the time.

It read “6:05 AM”.

“It’s still pretty early,” I said to myself. “Maybe I can sleep for another 5 minutes.” I thought.

So, I did and I wouldn’t realize that I’ve made a mistake until much later.

I woke up by the sun’s hot rays that was hitting my face.

“Aaah!” I said as I was blinded by the rays and felt the heat melting my face.

“What time is it?” I asked myself.

I grabbed my watch and looked at it. At first, I wasn’t able to see the time clearly and my mind wasn’t really working properly as I just woke up. I squinted and leaned forward to see it better, it read “6:40 AM”.

“f**k!” I swore as my eyes immediately opened.

I felt my adrenaline kicking in and every energy inside my body was channeled and released.

“FUCKKKKKKKKKKKK!” I swore at myself more as I realized what I have gotten myself into.

My first class starts at 7 AM but we all need to be in the classroom by this time already or else I will be considered late. However, if you show up just after your first class or after 7 AM, then you would be sent home. I didn’t want to be sent home; I don’t want to miss the first day of class. I didn’t want to set a first impression to my classmates that I was the guy who was absent or was sent home in the first day.

What’s more disappointing is that I’ve told Zachary, Jeremy, and Kim that we would meet in front of the school gate at 6:30.

I stood up from my bed and immediately opened my closet. I didn’t have time for a shower. My shower takes around 10 minutes already and that’s the time I need to walk to school, which would mean that I would already be late if I had taken a shower. So, I just removed my clothes from the day before, rolled on my deodorant and sprayed on my perfume, I also wet my hair and combed it to give an impression that I was just fresh out of the shower.

Then, I looked myself at the mirror while wearing my school uniform neat and tidy. “Looking slick, Ethan.” I complimented myself.

I grabbed my watch to wear it and it said “6:47 AM.”

“f**k!”, only 3 minutes to get out of the house and 10 minutes to walk to school.

“I can do this!” I motivated myself.

In my life, this is the only and the first time that I was going to be this late. I always woke up early and got to school early that sometimes I was the first one in class. Have you heard of the saying “The early bird gets the early worm.”? Birds that start their flight early would have access to more worms than those who start late. I believed in that saying. If you’re the first one to do such a thing or encourage others to do something even if you are faced with a lot of backlashes then you would have a lot of recognition as the person who initiated the movement or invented a thing. Being first could improve your chances of success. It emphasizes that starting something early will maximize the potential outcome of a situation. In class, if I was the first one to be in the classroom then I have more time to review my past notes and do the homework that I wasn’t able to finish the day before, I could also ask my classmates about school work and then I could be able to do it in advanced compared to if I was going to class late then I would be forced to listen to the teacher and not do my unfinished assignments.

There’s also another benefit of waking up early. If you wake up early where the sun’s rays is still at its best, not too hot and not too cold, and you could still feel the fresh warm breeze in the air, it would motivate you more to work and inspire you with ideas than waking up in the hot afternoon that would boil your skin alive. If you wake up early, then you would still have time to work out and prepare your breakfast and drink your energy smoothies. The morning in your day is kind of like the pre-workout in your workout routine. It conditions your body and prepares for the stress and heavy work that the day might bring. Have you heard of the saying that “Breakfast is the most important meal of the day.”? Or that “Breakfast like a king; lunch like a prince; dinner like a pauper.” It’s because you get all your energy for the whole day in eating your breakfast. While you’re working in the afternoon, you burn what you ate during breakfast that it wouldn’t be stored as fats. When you skip breakfast, your blood sugar level drops even lower. As a result, you get hungry and have less energy.

But at this time, time is my enemy, time is what’s going to kill me, time is what’s going to destroy me, time is what’s going to alter my life once and for all.

I may have overexaggerated because I haven’t been late yet, I don’t know what’s going to happen.

I didn’t have time to eat my breakfast so you’d expect how drained and tired I am. I just grabbed a mint gum to chew on from the candy shelf in the kitchen to eliminate the bad wake-up breath that I had from the night before.

I was already suited up and I was practically ready to go. So, I grabbed my bag, double-checked if I had everything that I need. Everything seems to be in order.

As I was going out, I saw my mother sleeping in her room with her door half opened.

Then I saw her face.

Then I remembered what happened last night.

The adrenaline in my body wasn’t able to remind me about the events of last night. I was too pre-occupied by the thought of me getting late and preparing to go to school.

I then felt what I felt last night – a heavy feeling in my heart.

I stared more at my mother.

Is this really my mother or is this an impostor?

Who was right last night? Was I making up the situation or was my mother?

or what if…

I was just dreaming the light and last night.

I was faced with a dilemma.

Should I wake up my mother and continue our conversation last night. Or should I pretend for the whole day that it didn’t happen, continue the conversation when I get home, and race to school today. It was a choice between facing my issue head-on or just relying the solution to the future me.

I weighed all the pros and cons. I sat down and took me a minute thinking as it was getting heavy standing up.

I looked at my watch and it said “6:49 AM”.

“f**k IT!” I thought.

I stood up and faced the door.

I took a last glance at my mother, trying to say farewell in my head.

Yes, I wanted to choose the latter option because it was more practical.

I’m not going to waste hours of my life debating over a topic, that I have already wasted time on last night, and make me miss one of the most important days in my year as a student.

What would you have chosen?

I think this is a battle between your emotions and your logic.

Maybe your eagerness to really learn the truth, to talk it out with your mother, and understand the situation that happened the other night or to understand the feeling that you have felt; the pride that you need to know everything that happens in your life; the confusion that you think some thing may have happened but none of the people around you acknowledge it; or the grief that you felt that for a moment, your mother was gone within your sight and within your life.

Would you have wasted your day and risked being absent on the first day of school for eagerness, pride, confusion, and grief?

Isn’t it better to go on with your day as you intended and continue the conversation later at night when you returned?

But then there’s this thought, what if your mother would be taken by the light again and you’re in school? And when you come home, you’ll never be able to see her, grasp her, and talk to her again.

“No, No!” I thought. I mustn’t let this negative thinking overcome my logic.

But what if this is the last moment that you’ll ever see your mother again, isn’t it better to talk to her and clarify things with her than later when it’s all too late?

I mean… the early bird gets the early worm, right? But would the late bird get the late worm?

I was stuck in another dilemma.

I looked at my watch and it read “6:49 AM”.

“UGH!” I was exhausted. I would only have 10 minutes to walk to school and a minute to spare. I would be practically be beating the clock.

At this point, I didn’t know what to choose.

I just wished that an asteroid would fall on Earth or that an earthquake would shake the ground so that I didn’t have to race to school today.

Then, a great idea hit me!

What if I adopt the idea of “Flipism,” a pseudo-philosophy of life in which the most important decisions are made by the flipping of a coin.

It was first introduced in the Disney comic book “Flip Decision” on where Professor Betty persuaded Donald Duck to do all the important decisions in life by the flip of a coin.

“Life is a Gamble. Let flipism guide your ramble.”

I was about to reach to my wallet and grab a coin when I received a text on my cellphone.

It was from an Unknown Number.

Weird, who would text me at this hour at this day?

I unlocked my phone to read what it said.

“We’re waiting for you.”