I paid for my coffee and got out of there. Kevin was already in the car and I walk to the car and open the car door and got in the car and told Kevin to stop the car at the Nearest general store I need to buy some things for Lilly . He Nod's and start the car . This car breathes and takes energy as if it were part of the flora of the land, and so driving becomes as natural as running free. I still couldn't believe on my eyes what I saw today . . . Flashback "Because it's a f*****g disaster to be creative when you know you're not Mozart or Keats. Dammit, I got tired of scratching around in my past. There's nothing in me to justify the pretension of creativity. This came before anything, before you, this is a matter of my own emptiness, my awareness of my own limits, maybe my sterility.

