Jealous Gore And The Victim

Adoration

"Veteran in adoration,

Leeway to my ecstasy,

Natty in my joy,

Intellectual in nostalgia, this is what I am feeling at the front of my house.

I saw an angel walking towards me, smiling and calling my name, urging me to come over. The pain is over.

He said, “It’s okay, lean on me. I will care for you and love you. Heartbreaks can be blessings that come to you. Oh dear, I am your God-sent angel of miracles.”

He had curly hair, a standard-pretty face, and a sweet smile that brightened his features. His lanky frame brought me joy and happiness, unlike before when the sun refused to rise. The pain is over now. Oh, my little baby girl.

Courage and hope are lessons I learned, and I put them into practice for providential gain.

What is life all about if not possessing wealth that isn’t measured in material terms but in health and enrichment?

I fell in love so easily because I wasn’t loved properly before. Now this boy is about to mess with my mind and feelings I wasn't prepared for, yet he is hounding me with a bond.

I’m digging into my feelings, searching for gold that brings forth hope, and the words I wasn't ready to utter are now emerging.

My love for Yusuf is lingering, germinating, and I am embracing these feelings. I know this is love.

I was outside the gate with Aisha, having a conversation when Yusuf and his siblings arrived in my front yard. “Hello, good evening, everyone,” they greeted.

“Hello, good evening,” we responded.

“Is Daddy home?” he asked.

“Yes, he’s inside. Are these your siblings?” I inquired.

“Yes. This is Amina, Halima, Khadija, Hauwa, and our youngest, Kabir,” he replied.

“Are you the firstborn in your family?” I asked.

“Yes, but Amina is my twin sister, and the others follow,” he said.

“So Amina, why did you let him come first? Did you forget the quote ‘ladies first’?” I teased.

They all laughed, and he asked, “So you can talk like this?”

“No, I don’t. I’m deaf and dumb. Let’s go inside and see Dad. Oh, sorry, my bad—my name is Salma,” I introduced myself.

They all responded, “Nice to meet you, dear.”

I already loved them.

We went to the sitting room, and I called Dad. He responded, “I’m coming.”

We continued chatting, asking questions and giving answers, until Dad came out to greet them. “I’m about to go out, and you all arrived. Salma and Aisha, please keep them company. But Salma, come with me to the car; I have some chocolates for you,” he said.

He handed me some bags of chocolates to share and then left.

We kept each other company until it felt as though we had known each other for years. We exchanged contact numbers, and it was a lovely night for farewells.

I finally made friends, and now a new dawn was upon me. I struggled through sleepless nights, reminiscing about my love for Yusuf, who didn’t know anything about my feelings for him.

“Hi, what’s up with you? It’s Yusuf,” he sent me a message on w******p, but I didn’t open it even though I saw it.

I ignored the message until the next day. He called twice, and I ignored the calls, but then he sent me a direct message.

“The thought of you speaks louder than thunder, possessing me in every breath I take. To be without you would mean being without air. This feeling rides me like Aron on a dolphin’s back, and as long as I live, I will carry this love with me.

If I have to leave this place called Earth, I want to preserve these feelings as a legacy in your heart.

From now on, this is how I feel—no doubts or lessening of my desire. Even if you don’t feel the same way, I’ll keep speaking for love; it’s my choice to either embrace virtue or be silly.

I may be too young to feel this deeply, but I want to grow forever in this love.

I saw your decency, and I fell for it. I want to express my truthfully earnest feelings for you.

Cast me into the world, dear lady, and watch my heart bloom like letters adorning walls of love that leave me restless.

Let me serve you tea and bread, and let me walk with you amidst the men, leading the way.

Your beautiful self and kind behavior have enchanted me with your love.

I'm not Shakespeare, but I wish I were, so I could write a whole book about my feelings for you, despite my pen being dry.

I love you, Salma, and I hope you receive this.”

My heart was overwhelmed, and I began to blush at his words. Why would he say so much?

Maybe he was joking, but the way he looked at me revealed something more. “But how old is he?” I wondered.

I was sure I loved him, but I had to play hard to get. My plan was to ignore him for a while until after my exams, but I knew I wouldn’t be able to resist creating chances for us to connect more closely afterward.

“Coordinate yourself, please,” I reminded myself, battling my overthinking and exaggeration of these feelings for Yusuf, whom I didn’t know that well.

I showed Aisha the message, and she was already catching feelings.

“The guy is romantic, handsome, gentle, intelligent, tall, and nice. I hope you give him a chance,” she said.

"Hi, I hope you can sing and write more love theories; you can speak many music languages? Because this is a whole album you just sent to me.

Sorry, I missed your call then. I was so busy. I saw your direct message, and now I read your w******p message. I hope you take it slow.

How are you and your siblings?

Hope y'all will visit again?" I replied to his messages on w******p, but he wasn't online.

The thought of him kept on and more desire blazing; I wouldn't understand what it meant to be in love. I may mistake it and give it different perceptions, but I need to understand it in his company with me.

Pathetic I felt for myself on too much fantasy for love, and I can't pathway with it nor sword it.

Love is a beautiful thing when it falls in the right place, but it may have fools in hand at the wrong.

I put down for him because he made me feel beautiful and special when ugly was my name, made me discover my worth when I didn't, came out brave when I was inferior, and kind words from him when I needed it; I want to feel better with him.

Never in my life will I give it up for bully again and peace of mind is what I want to be drinking at the time.

As I sat there, staring at the screen, Aisha’s excitement bubbled over. “You have to reply!” she urged, her eyes sparkling with mischief. “What are you waiting for?”

I bit my lip, contemplating the weight of his words. Each phrase felt like a tender caress, igniting a fire within me that I had never known before. But doubt crept in like a shadow. What if I opened my heart only to find it shattered again?

“I don’t know, Aisha. What if he’s just saying all this to impress me? What if it’s all a game?” I replied, my voice laced with uncertainty.

“Salma, you’re overthinking it! He seems genuine. Besides, you deserve a little romance in your life. Just respond!” she encouraged, nudging my shoulder playfully.

With a deep breath, I opened the chat again. The message was still there, pulsing with unspoken emotions. I could feel my heart racing, thrumming against my ribcage. After a moment's hesitation, my fingers began to dance across the keyboard.

“Hi, Yusuf,” I typed, my heart pounding with each keystroke. “Thank you for your beautiful words. They mean a lot to me. I hope you don’t mind if I take my time to process everything. I’m not used to feeling this way.”

I hit send before I could change my mind. A rush of vulnerability washed over me, and I felt exposed yet exhilarated. Aisha squealed softly, her excitement palpable. “See? That wasn’t so hard, was it?”

I shrugged, half-smiling, half-nervous. “Maybe not, but now I have to wait for his reply.”

As the minutes ticked by, I felt a mixture of anticipation and dread. Would he understand my hesitation? Would he still feel the same after reading my response? I glanced at my phone, willing it to light up with his name, but nothing came.

“Let’s go for a walk,” Aisha suggested, sensing my restlessness. “A little fresh air will do you good.”

We stepped outside, the evening air cool against my skin. The sun was setting, casting a golden hue over everything, and for a moment, I forgot about my worries. We wandered through the neighborhood, chatting about school and life, but my mind was elsewhere—lost in thoughts of Yusuf and his heartfelt message.

Just as we turned the corner, my phone buzzed in my pocket. My heart skipped a beat. I fished it out, and there it was: a message from Yusuf.

“Take all the time you need, Salma. I’ll be here, waiting. I just wanted you to know that you’re special to me. No pressure, just know that my feelings are real, and I’m here for you.”

I read it over and over, a smile blooming on my face. “He’s so sweet,” I murmured to Aisha, who was peering over my shoulder.