Spectrum

Chapter 14

" I do not approve of this, " My mother said, hands crossed and eyes narrowed looking at my car in her small driveway.

" Do I care? " The words flew out of my mouth before I could stop them causing me to fight the urge to put my hand over my mouth.

I did not intend to be disrespectful, as much as I disliked her, she still gave birth to me and I should still put some sort of respect on her name.

I had seemed to surprise everyone as I was getting lifted eyebrows and shocked looks. My mother, who had now moved closer to me, was angrier than I expected her to be.

" You're living in my house, you don't get to disrespect me like this and you aren't driving that car, " She seethed reaching out for the keys which were in my hand.

" When you show me your name on any financial document pertaining to this car then you can try having some type of input on what I do with my car, until then, you don't tell me whether or not I can drive a car that my father bought for me. " It took everything in me to hold some restraint as I was getting more heated as the words spewed out of my mouth.

She gritted her death together staring at me through her narrowed eyes.

" Alright, since you're so grown, drive your little car, I'll be damned if that s**t gets hijacked off you, " Her last statement left me crushing the keys in my hand.

I turned and headed for the gate which was sort of a bad idea seeing the community that I was currently was in, not only was it unfamiliar to me but it was also not the safest but none of that crossed my mind as I proceeded to walk down the street.

I walked for a long while until I was basically lost and barely even knew where I was until I came upon a park to which I entered and sat on one of the many benches.

I sat for a while watching my surroundings, from the children playing on the swings to the teens huddled in groups talking to each other and the many adults watching over the park and from there on, I could tell this was another hotspot.

Hotspots were the areas that the gangbangers would meet and discuss, the corner store which Jamal and the others would constantly meet were one of them.

From the few bullet holes in the fence by the side of the park, I could already imagine what went down here after hours.

I don't know how long I was staring at the kids on the swings until I felt someone sit beside me to which I paid no attention to the person until they spoke.

" Remember when we used to do that, " Mason said pointing over to the kids trying to bury each other in the shallow sandbox with a ghost of a smile on his face and I couldn't help but smile at the kids.

" Yeah, "

" What happened to us? " He asks staring into the sunset.

" What happened to us? Really Mason? We've been here for over a month and all you've been doing is avoiding me, we haven't spent any time together, if I didn't know any better, I would say you had planned to come here all along, " My words came out a bit harsh but I kept a calm looking face.

" Seriously? Milan, you know me, why would I purposefully want to come here? " He said turning to face me.

" I don't know, you tell me, I'm not dumb you know, " I said relaxin a bit in the chair.

" I never said you were but Milan, what other reason than to make sure that you were going to be safe that I would come here? I came for you and you're really trying to say that I have ulterior motives, you're my little sister, I love you and I would never do anything to betray your trust. " He said sounding a bit hurt but I knew better.

It now appeared to me how much I had really been manipulated, he would always do the same voice and pulled the same tricks when he betrayed my trust or when he wanted me to do things that he knew would send our father through the moon.

I wasn't a bad child, I wasn't disobedient, I did what I did to make my brother happy, to make him see that I was the perfect little sister, no relationship was perfect but ours surely wasn't normal. Our relationship was purely built on manipulation and it was saddening that it was just now that I was realizing this.

" Ok then Mason, " I rolled my eyes at him to which he frowned.

" You've changed, " He said.

" And so have you but we won't talk about that, " I said sarcastically.

" How have I changed? Since the moment you got here you've made it quite clear who you value and it sure isn't me, kind of felt betrayed for a bit." He said, his words coming out forced as if trying to penalize me.

" What? I made friends because everyone in that damn house seems to have some type of personal vendetta against me and it feels as if you're against me, you stood there Mason, she was about to hit me and you just stood there watching as if you agreed with what she was about to do Mason, you want to talk about betrayal, there is it. " I said my voice getting a bit lower to the end not wanting anyone around hearing me.

He let out a deep sigh " There's-there's just some things that you won't understand- " I cut him off before he could continue.

" Enlighten me then, help me understand, I know she's our mother but she tried to hit me, for what? for what Mason? you claim that she abused you but you would be willing to let her a***e me? you swear up and down that you would never allow her to harm me in any way but you stood there Mason, even a stop would have been nice you know, I've honestly never felt like I mattered to you and that night proved it all to me Mase, " I said my voice cracking a bit.

" I-, I honestly don't know what to say, I didn't know you felt that way, to me, you've always been my partner in crime, my best friend Milan and I wouldn't ever purposefully try to make you feel that way, we're blood, " He said looking at me a bit sad.

Blood? As Azariah would say, blood may be thicker than water but it's slippery as hell.

" Ok, " I said staring off as the sun had now gone down leaving the sky in hues of blue and dark purple.

" Ok, is that all you have to say Milan, ok, " He turned to me giving me one of those 'really' faces to which I ignored.

" What do you want me to say? " I asked a bit irritated.

" I don't know, what do you want to say Milan? " He replied.

" Go, " I pointed towards the exit of the part.

" Go? " He asked, his eyebrows scrunching up together.

" I'm sure I did not stutter, you heard me, " I said sassily.

" Go where Milan, you don't even know the way back and I'll be damned if I left you out here at nightfall with all these g**g members crawling around the place, " And for the second time in our argument, I took notice of the surrounding.

The park was half empty and was crawling with shady people and it was then I decided that it was time to go so I got up and headed towards the gate of the park not caring if Mason was following me or not and he was wrong, I did know the way back. I would be dumb not to make note of where I was going especially in a sort of g**g-controlled neighbourhood.

" You can't stay mad at me forever Milan, " Came Mason's voice as he was trailing a bit behind me.

" Watch me, " I said being a bit petty.

" I know you and I know you can't sis, " Which was what he thought.

I wasn't going to be weak for him anymore, the irony of it all, I presented myself as a strong person to everyone but I fell weak to my brother's demand and I didn't plan to be weak for him anymore, I was going to play him at his own game and I intended to win.

Not too long later we were walking through the gates of the house but just before we could get to the door and go in I was pulled back by Mason.

" I don't know what you think of me sis, but just know, I would never purposefully put you in any situation to be harmed.