My Coma Girl

Chapter 21

Xenon's POV

Kakatapos lang ng first subject namin sa umaga at pakiramdam ko ay kanina pa ako iniiwasan ni Momo.

I'm not sure why.

Wala pa rin akong pinag sasabihan ng kahit ano tungkol dun sa picture at hindi pa rin ako mapakali dahil dun. Ngayon pang iniiwasan ako ni Momo, paano ako makaka tyempo na sabihin sa kanya yung tungkol dun?

"Hey um...."

Pag kausap ko kay Momo pero bigla syang tumalikod at nakipag usap sa iba naming kaklase.

"May earphones ka?"

Rinig kong tanong nya sa kaklase namin. Iniiwasan nya nga talaga ako.

"Here"

"Thank you"

Napabuntong hininga ako at umayos nalang ng pag kakaupo sa upuan ko habang inaantay ang sunod naming teacher.

"Bakit ka tumawag sakin kagabi?"

Tanong ni Alex sakin na kasalukuyang kumakain nanaman.

"Ah, wala lang

"Miss mo siguro ako no?"

He said and I just gave him an 'ew' look.

Sana matapos na kaagad yung klase this morning. Half day lang kasi kami ngayon kasi magpapractice kami for the play dahil malapit na yun at kinakapos na kami sa oras.

"Nag away kayo?"

Pabulong na tanong ni Alex.

"No"

Sagot ko.

"Eh bakit hindi kayo nagpapansinan?"

"Hindi ko din alam basta hindi nya ako pinapansin"

Dahil ba yun sa kahapon? Pero bakit nya naman ako iiwasan dahil dun? I mean it's not completely my fault.

"Poor Xenon"

Pang aasar pa ni Alex.

"Sino kaya satin yung umiiyak kapag hindi pinapansin ng girlfriend nya"

Pang aasar ko din sa kanya. Kung umiyak yan akala mo katapusan na ng mundo eh.

Hindi naman sila laging nag aaway ni Mitch sadyang oa lang si Alex. They're actually a good couple at never pa silang nag hiwalay.

We both think that it's toxic, breaking up tapos magkakabalikan lang din. Yung paulit-ulit.

"Hindi ako umiiyak no"

"Talaga? May ebidensya pa naman ako"

I record his crying one time because it was so funny.

"Fake"

"Shoul I send it to Mitch?"

"WAG!"

Sigaw at todo pag iling nya kaya napatawa ako ng malakas.

"Ediwow Xenon Castillo!"

Pikon yan?

Patuloy pa din ako sa pag tawa ko at napahinto lang ako nang dumating na yung sunod naming teacher.

"Good morning everyone"

"Good morning maam"

We all greeted back.

"Kamusta naman ang practice ng mga kasali sa play?"

"Okay naman po"

One of our classmates answered.

"What about the main characters? Snow white and the prince, kamusta naman?"

Maam Tores asked.

"Um, it's good. Mag papractice na po kami mamaya ng sayaw"

I answered.

"That's good. I'm looking forward for your performance guys. Good luck to all of you"

"Thank you maam"

We all said in chorus and Maam Tores smiled.

"Okay let's start our class now"

Binuksan ko na yung aklat ko at hinanap yung page na isinulat ni maam sa white board.

Nakinig ako ng maayos hanggang sa matapos ang buong klase. Hindi ganun katagal para sakin dahil masaya naman ang klase. Maam Tores is a kind and funny teacher kaya hindi ka maiinip sa klase nya.

Pagkatapos na pagkatapos ng klase ay nagmamadaling umalis na kaagad si Momo. Para syang naghahabol ng oras sa pag mamadali nya.

"Natatae ba yun? Sayang hindi ko nayaya sumabay satin kumain ng lunch"

Alex said.

"Hindi sasabay yun"

Nagmamadali ata yun para makaiwas samin.

"Inaway mo siguro talaga"

"Hindi nga"

Hindi naman diba?

"Tara na nga"

Alex said at inakbayan ako palabas ng classroom. Sinundo namin si Mitch at Naomi na kasama na rin si Kenjay pagkatapos ay naglakad na kami papunta sa pinaka masarap na kainan malapit sa school. Suki na kami dun eh.

"Ano nang balita sa inyo ni Clara?"

Mitch asked.

"I don't know, iniiwasan nya ako ngayong umaga eh"

"Why?"

Tanong nya ulit.

"I'm not sure why"

"Inaway nya babe"

Sagot ni Alex kaya mahinang binatukan ko sya para madala. Agad syang tumingin kay Mitch na parang nag susumbong at ginulo-gulo lang ni Mitch yung buhok nya.

"Cutie"

Mitch said to him.

Nang makapasok kami sa loob ay nag order kami kaagad at nag simulang kumain para makapag pahinga pa kami ng kaunti bago bumalik sa school.

"How's the poem you're writing?"

Mitch asked to Naomi.

She's a member of creative writing club.

"Oh gosh, ang daming tambak na papel sa basurahan ko"

"What is your poem about?"

I asked.

"It's like about 'true love is not real unless it's returned' don't you guys agree?"

Naomi asked.

"It's not true"

Sagot ko.

"I agree"

Pag sang ayon naman ni Kenjay sakin.

"Why?"

"Love is caring for someone. It is about wanting them to have everything they want no matter how it destroys you. It's selfless"

Kenjay answered.

"You don't stop loving a person just because they can't love you back"

I added.

"I agree"

Naomi said.

"Eh bakit ganun title mo?"

Alex asked.

"Kasi I know that love should be selfless but I believe that you should not be stuck there forever. Imagine loving a person who can't love you back for 80 years. That is so sad"

I understand her point and it's true, it's sad to love someone who can't love you back.

I already confess to her, I know I confess at a very wrong time, I honestly waited for a response but I didn't get any even now.

She didn't said yes or no.

We just continued how we used to be.

If I did confess on the right time, will I get a response from her?

"What about loving a person from far away?"

Mitch asked.

"I'm not sure but I think it would not last. One sided love is not forever right?"

"Maybe"

I answered.

After talking about Naomi's poem, we started eating then rest a little bit before going back to the campus.

Sa stage na kami kaagad dumiretso ni Alex at pagkarating namin dun ay mukang hindi pa naman nag sisimula.

We placed our bags at the side of the stage again. Nang dumating si Sir Suarez ay may kasama syang mga lalake, carrying a piano.

Maybe it's for the play.

"Sir can I play the piano?"

Tanong ko habang nakataas pa ang isa kong kamay.

"Sure, hindi pa naman tayo mag sisimula"

Sir Suarez answered kaya lumapit na ako sa harap ng piano at umupo sa upuan dun.

"Ang perfect mo talaga Xenon, marunong ka pa palang mag piano"

Farah said, one of my classmates.

"Sana all"

Yam added and I just smiled at them.

I started playing the piano at tumahimik bigla ang lahat. So far this piece is the only piece that I can remember how to play.

What falling inlove feels like Jake 25.7. It's a beautiful piece to play. I also listen to this piece when I was young before falling asleep.

Momo's POV

Lahat kami ay napahinto sa pag tugtog ni Xenon ng piano. Lahat kami ay nakatingin sa kanya but I am looking at him with deep thoughts about what if.

What if...... I ..... me and him.....

"Galing ni Xenon no?"

Alex asked and I just smiled.

"Mabait din yan, mayaman, pogi katulad ko tapos hindi ka lolokohin"

Alex said and I faced him.

"I know what you're doing"

I said and he just gave me a peace sign.

"Sa tingin ko lang kasi bagay kayo. Walang biased. That's what I really think"

He said.

"I have a boyfriend"

I answered.

"An asshole boyfriend"

"Excuse me?"

"He punched Xenon right?"

Tanong ni Alex at napayuko naman ako bigla sa hiya.

I feel so bad.

"I'm sorry"

"If you just remember everything, you will not believe how lucky you are"

Alex said then left.

I don't know what does he mean by that. I'm so confused but I feel like kinda get it. I'm lucky to be the girl that Xenon likes.

Ibinalik ko ang mga tingin ko kay Xenon. He's still playing the piano.

Ayoko naman talaga syang iwasan but Steven wants me to avoid him.

"What the heck was that?!"

I shouted when Xenon left.

"I should be the one asking you that Clara. What the heck was that?"

"What?"

I asked.

"You're going home with that guy? You know I don't like him!"

I know you don't but what can I do?

"Who am I going to go home with then? You're always not around Steven for f**k's sake!"

Why is everything my fault?

"Anyone but not that Xenon"

"Really Steven?"

I'm so mad right now. I know he doesn't like Xenon because of that fact that Xenon likes me but I don't have any friends and I like them. Sila nila Alex, Mitch, Naomi and Kenjay.

It's so hard, pakiramdam ko naiipit ako sa gitna.

"Do you like him?"

"Instead of asking that, why don't you ask yourself if you're still my boyfriend or not because I don't feel like you are anymore! I don't even feel like I have a boyfriend"

Napaiyak na ako.

Parang sasabog ang puso ko dahil sa nararamdaman kong sakit.

"You know I'm always busy Clara"

"I know, I understand pero Steven as your girlfriend kailangan din naman kita"

Our fight that day continued until we both said sorry to each other at mapagkasunduan na hindi na ako lalapit pa kay Xenon as much as possible.

We are trying to fix our relationship.

Ayokong bumitaw nang hindi ako sigurado. Gusto kong ibigay lahat ng kaya ko in this relationship because I don't want to regret anything. That is just how I am.

I don't know how and until when can Xenon keep loving me but I hope he will. I know it's selfish but I also know that I love him too.

I just...

I just can't do it.

Nang matapos nang tumogtog si Xenon ay pumalakpak lahat ng nasa paligid kasama na ako dun.

"Amazing talent Xenon. Thank you so much for the very short but beautiful entertainment"

Sir Suarez said to Xenon habang pumapalakpak pa.

"Thank you sir"

"Kailan kapa nagsimulang mag piano?"

Sir Suarez asked.

"Nung first year highschool po. Nag paturo po ako dati sa kaibigan ng daddy ko"

Xenon answered.

"Kaya naman pala"

I can also play piano but not that good. Hindi ko na din saulo kaya paniguradong magkakamali ako.

"Okay! Everyone. Let's start the practice!"

Malakas na sabi ni Sir Suarez kay nag tipon tipon na kaming lahat.

"Lahat naman kayo ay alam na ang steps sa sayaw, tama?"

Nakangiting tanong ni Sir at lahat naman kami ay sumagot ng oo.

"That's my students! Very good! Now, let's start again. I will play the music"

Pumwesto na kami kaharap ang mga ka partner namin sa sayaw.

Nasa harap ko si Xenon ngayon pero hindi ako nakatingin sa kanya kundi kay Sir Suarez para mag mukang nag aantay akong iplay nya yung music.

Hindi ko kayang tumingin kay Xenon. Masyado na akong madaming atraso sa kanya.

"Humarap ka sakin"

Xenon said.

Napatingin ako sa kanya dahil sa sinabi nya pero hindi din nag tagal ang pag tama ng aming mga tingin dahil muli akong umiwas agad.

Nang magkaron na ng music ay itinaas ko ang kanang kamay ko at idinikit ni Xenon ang kamay nya sa kamay kong nakataas.

Magkadikit ang mga palad namin habang mabagal na umiikot. Dapat ay magkatinginan kami habang ginagawa ito pero hindi ko kaya.

"May nagawa ba ako?"

Xenon asked.

Please don't say or ask anything. Mas nahihirapan ako.

Umiling nalang ako sa kanya bilang sagot.

"Kung ganun, tingnan mo ako sa mga ko"

He said and I deeply sighed.

I cant.

"Momo"

Pag tawag nya sakin at sa hindi ko siguradong dahilan ay napatingin ako sa kanya na may halong emosyong hindi ko malaman kung ano.

Sa pag tingin ko sa mga mata nya ay saktong may malakas na hangin na dumaan samin dahilan para tumayo ang mga balahibo ko sa katawan.

Para akong biglang naligaw sa kung saan. Para akong nalulunod sa mga tingin nya.

"Anong....."

May gusto akong itanong pero hindi ko malaman kung ano.

Xenon smiled at me bitterly.

Kagaya ng dapat kung gawin sa pag sayaw ay marahan kong hinawakan ang pisngi nya habang diretsong nakatingin sa mga mata nya.

"Xenon, sabihin mo sakin....."

"Ang alin?"

Tanong nya.

"Kilala ba kita dati pa?"

Tanong ko at napahinto naman sya sa pag sasayaw. Tinanong ko yun dahil pamiramdam ko ay matagal na kaming magkakilala kesa sa pagkakaalam ko.

Sa tuwing may ginagawa kami ay parang bang nangyare na yun dati samin pero hindi ko sigurado. Lalo na kapag dumidikit ang mga palad namin.

May kakaiba akong nararamdaman.

"Naalala mo na ba ako?"

Tanong nya at mas lalong mas napakunot ang noo ko.

"Magkakilala tayo dati?"

Tanong ko din sa kanya.

"Ikaw at ako......"

"Snow white and prince! Bakit kayo tumigil?"

Pag putol ni Sir Suarez sa sasabihin sana ni Xenon nang makita nya kaming hindi sumasayaw.

"Sorry po"

Sagot ko.

"It's okay, ulit tayo from the top okay?"

Malambing na tanong ni Sir Suarez at tumango naman kaming pareho ni Xenon.

May mga bagay ba akong hindi naalala?