Shadow of the Moon

Chapter 13

Estella

I couldn't bring myself to return to the manor, to face the suffocating grief that was eating a hole inside me. Instead, I rose on shaky legs and wandered aimlessly through the forest, my body heavy with sorrow, my clothes stained with Astra's blood. Her honey and citrus scent clogging my nose. I walked until the trees thinned and the familiar darkness gave way to the harsh glare of Eloria.

The desert stretched before me, a vast expanse of sand and rock that mirrored the emptiness in my soul. The magic pulled at my skin as I crossed the shimmer, as if it wanted me to turn back. As if it didn’t want me to cross into the horrible land that had ripped my soul in half.

I stumbled onward, my legs aching, my throat parched. The sun beat down mercilessly, but I felt numb to its heat, my senses dulled. I finally collapsed beneath the meager shade of a towering boulder, my gaze drawn to the castle below me. I had never been this close to the grey stone of the capital, Kyros had deemed it too risky to bring me anywhere near the horrible place. What was I looking for? I didn't know.

All I knew was that I couldn't bear the thought of returning to the world I knew, a world that now felt empty and devoid of joy. Astra was dead, and with her, a part of me had died as well.

I closed my eyes as hot tears traced a path down my dust-streaked cheeks. The memory of Astra's laughter, her mischievous grin, her unwavering loyalty, echoed in my mind, a bittersweet symphony of love and loss. My lip wobbled as I fought back the soul reaching sobs that wanted to escape.

Why her? Why not me? The question clawed at my throat, a bitter accusation against the cruel twist of fate that had taken my sister, leaving me behind to bear the weight of grief. She was the strong one, the one destined for greatness, not me. I was nothing.

My attention was pulled down to the castle at a flash of gold. I watched as a carriage, drawn by three magnificent creatures with humped backs and coats of shimmering gold, emerged from the castle gates. Servants loaded it with crates, their movements hurried and furtive. Then, two guards dragged a figure towards the carriage.

My breath hitched in my throat. Kyros. His body was limp, his clothes stained with blood, his face etched with blank as he was held between the two guards. I had to cover my mouth to muffle my sob as they threw him into the carriage, not caring if they hurt him further. They acted as if he were nothing.

A female whom I had not noticed before shifted her eyes up to me, as if hearing the muffled sound. Her hair was a fiery red that cascaded down her back in loose waves, her golden jeweled gown shining in the sun. Her face was so familiar yet so foreign, her eyes, a bright gold that matched her gown were red rimmed. She clutched a handkerchief in her hand, her body stiff.

It almost looked as if she were holding herself back, she moved stiffly and rehearsed. Her golden eyes were full of kindness as she stared at me, it felt like a warm caress.

I recognized the regal bearing, the aura of authority. The Queen of Eloria.

She dipped her head slightly at me, her hair falling around her before she turned and slipped inside the carriage behind her son. Crates were loaded onto the back and servants rushed around. After a few moments, a harsh “HURRY UP” echoed from the carriage. With that, the reigns were snapped, and the golden creatures took off at a surprising speed as they raced over the sand and disappeared into the simmering heat to the east.

I watched until it was nothing more than a speck on the horizon, my tears blurring my vision. Then, with a newfound resolve hardening my heart, I rose to my feet. This was all my fault. All my fault. I should never have opened my heart. Never again will I make that mistake, show that kind of weakness.

I rose on shaking legs and walked until the familiar darkness of the forest enveloped me, until my legs felt like jelly. I stumbled through the trees, my body guided by instinct, my mind consumed by grief. Servants took one look at me once I was back in the keep and instantly darted out of my path. I didn’t even look at them as I moved numbly through the halls towards my rooms. Finally, I collapsed onto my bed, the soft mattress a welcome respite from the harshness of the world outside.

But even in the sanctuary of my own room, the echoes of Astra's cries and the image of Kyros's broken body haunted my dreams. Sleep offered no escape, only a twisted reflection of the pain and loss that consumed me.

I tossed and turned, my sheets tangled around my limbs, my body aching with a weariness that went beyond physical exhaustion. The silence of the night was deafening, broken only by the occasional sob that escaped my lips.

I didn’t know how much time had passed, but at some point, my door creaked open. The light of the torches in the hall cast long shadows into my dark room. I didn’t bother looking up, I didn’t care who it was.

My bed dipped, two figures slipping in. One wrapping around my back, the other wiggling and nudging until I let them crawl into my embrace. My arms wrapped around the small figure of Lynx, her little body shaking with sobs as she clung to me. Behind me, Thallia began stroking my hair, soothing the deep ache in my chest slightly.