Ludi

New

A trace of food on Quatre's face, made him unconsciously reach up and cleaned him gently. His chest ached, he felt sadness, nostalgia, happiness, anger... tears flowed without intending to, and out of nowhere Quatre wiped his face with part of the robe. 

"WuFei... what...?" 

"Master Quatre, I'm so sorry. Since I'm taking care of you, I'm not sure what's happening to me" 

"I think you were with me that day..." WuFei didn't seem to understand what he was saying "it was in that dream that I had... it made me remember the nightmares I used to have... although they looked different, now I know it was you WuFei... I think you were also my guard at that time... but in my nightmares you were dead next to me, and I couldn't do nothing... my body couldn't move... I suppose it was the same to what you call the unconsciousness... it makes me sad to remember that nightmare." 

WuFei pounced on him with a firm kiss, while framing Quatre's face with his hands, his chest ached intensely and agonizing. Quatre had never felt anything like that, except in his dreams. Something he had yearned for in his short existence was knowing why he felt this way in a dream and not in real life; and seemed to have found it. 

Quatre returned the kiss, a little shy, a little awkward and trembling, feeling WuFei relax as he placed his hands over those of the young guardian. He opened his eyes, and saw those long black eyes, confused, watching him. 

Out of nowhere the guard got up and left the room. What had he done? Quickly it had become a necessity to want to kiss him, and to be with him, perhaps he wouldn't have been able to stop himself if he continued beyond what his will power allowed. He needed to know, but didn't know who to ask. There was nothing in the logs about Sandrock having had partners or offspring... only the dealings with other kingdoms, and the deeds of the goddess were recorded. 

While wandering around the temple, he met the elderly monk, who was doing meditation in the moonlight. 

"Elder... I need to talk to you... Master Quatre says he dreamed of his previous death and... that I was there..." 

The old man sat up and motioned for him to follow him. 

"I was a child, when Lady Sandrock died... her death was horrible... and yours, it was more" WuFei stopped for a moment assimilating the truth that came to him at once "Sandrock's guardian is reborn with her every time she needs it." 

"But, how… I don't remember anything… there are no records of that…" 

"That's because there shouldn't be." They went to a bench next to a flowered tree, with gray trunk and burgundy petals, where the old man sat down, and invited WuFei to accompany him "We must keep the secret, from mouth to mouth. The elder tells the younger, so that the secret lasts over time. From the beginning, Sandrock and her guardian have always been together. Whatever form they take, they always meet. I must say that you were once an indomitable tiger, but with Sandrock you were always protective. No one else could approach you. If you don't remember anything, it's because your soul is not immortal, but it's united to the goddess for protection. In another life you hated each other to death, but you never stopped doing your duty. At some point in our history a king found out that you were both reincarnated, so he made sure that Sandrock was always alone, constantly attacking ... it was in the Wastelands War, where 2 complete kingdoms and 3 villages disappeared. He thought that, in this way, he could dominate her by leaving her defenseless, but the same people decided that it was too much, and they rose up against that king. Surprisingly, you were within his very court, I think you were an earl ... Sandrock can remember every life she had, if she wishes, but it is becoming more painful ... ever, you were her friend, her pet, her lover, her husband ... It was increasingly painful to lose you. It was decided not to record any of that for the good of all, and that you would be told everything when the time was right. There's an apprentice who knows everything, and who is trained not to speak unless necessary, since my days are getting scarcer. 

WuFei was very attentive and surprised by the old man's story. So it was true that he had been with him in his previous life, and what he felt was as real as if they had spent years together… although it was unfair that he couldn't remember anything. 

"Do you mean that... we are... a couple... always?" 

"No. As I was saying, at some point, they hated each other. In another life they were friends ... perhaps their relationship improved with each reincarnation, I don't know. We didn't give much importance to that. Life is about living well... not with great luxuries or comforts. If not to be with those we love, enjoy what we have, and appreciate life and our achievements. Master Chang, you should stop thinking so much. Your instinct is very good, and it is because you have been training for centuries without knowing it." 

"How was it that I… died?" 

"We're not sure... the squad that accompanied them that time, had gone to attend a small disturbance in the nearby village. When they returned, they found pieces of you everywhere, and a tub of burning oil. It was horrible" 

WuFei remembered that part of the logs, but only Sandrock's death was inscribed. He stood up, and bowing he went back to his own room. 

Now he understood a little more of the wild urge he felt every time he was alone with Quatre. It was already something so big, there was no way to stop it. 

That night he tried to rest, while dreaming of fire and blood. 

The next day as he made his way to Quatre's room, he saw the monks and servants stopping in the hallways trying to figure out what was going on. Suddenly he managed to distinguish Quatre coming and going with jars and canvases, and brushes and fruit, he said nothing or looked at anyone. He was still dressed in his sleepwear. 

"What's going on?" WuFei asked to one of the servants. 

"Master Quatre requested paintings and canvases, and he don't allow no one to enter his room... we must clean, but he don't let us. Nor does he let us pass clean clothes... it's as if it wasn't him." 

Quatre closed the door behind him and WuFei approached, opening the door slowly. There were many things piled up in a corner, and the windows were still closed. The young man was eating at his little table, and was ignoring that someone had entered the room. The guard came up carefully speaking to him by name and title without getting an answer. He got close enough and noticed that the young man was blushing and sweating a little. Touching his forehead, he found that he had a high fever and his eyes were dull. The young man continued to do things, as if he were alone in the room, and WuFei went out for a few minutes. The monks were expectant. 

"I'll stay with Master Quatre ... something's off, but I don't know what it is ... it's like he doesn't see us. I'll let you know if we need anything. If you see him go looking for things, keep an eye on him, but don't get in his way… I need you to bring me the Trance book from the Sandrock Library… don't be alarmed and be discreet." 

They all went to do their chores, while WuFei returned to Quatre's room. He took a large cushion and sat in the far corner of the room to watch. 

Indeed, he didn't seem to notice his presence. He could watch how he spent his days painting, playing unfamiliar pieces of music and feeding from time to time, surely when he felt the need. WuFei remained in the corner or prowled the room without hindering the young man or altering his surroundings. He spent his nights awake, watching over the young man's poor sleep and reading the book he had requested: a compilation of events that anticipated the use of his power... and among them, none like the one he was witnessing. 

Day and night were the same, a chaotic routine of little rest, between music and paintings, long baths and eating fruits in whatever state they were. 

WuFei could no longer with the closure and decided to leave the room for a moment. It had been two weeks since he had cornered himself to watch Quatre. He fed himself, so he did not intervene, but even so, he was very little, and had lost excess weight. The early morning breeze helped clear his head a little. He understood many things already, and was not quite sure how to proceed in the face of all that was coming. It would not be easy to keep his distance, and it was not something he wanted to do either, he wished he could get closer to him, he needed to be able to hug him and feel his hair between his fingers, he needed to feel that he was with him and not in the place where he was. Once he was in a trance ... he would have to go through training or study in order to carry out the mission for which he arrived at that place, and that meant exposing his existence to the rest of the world, and to the dangers that were repeated in so many lives. He felt fear and sadness run through his veins. 

He ordered the servants to notify him in case the master left the room. He had breakfast, and carried out his daily routine, always making sure that the master could leave at any time. 

After lunch he returned to stand guard outside Quatre's room. He hadn’t come out, opened the windows, or spoken to anyone. He didn’t understand what was happening. 

Suddenly the doors to Quatre's room were thrown open and the young man came out taking a breath, while the breeze stirred his hair. 

WuFei watched expectantly from the side of the door. Quatre looked more rested, but too thin, almost sickly. Servants who passed by with some baskets of food returned on their way, warning that Master Quatre had left the room. 

“WuFei, good morning? Excuse me... I'm not sure what time it is... I think I slept too much.” 

He approached the young man and took him by the arms and pressed his forehead to his. He watched him turn red up to his neck, and he stayed like that for a couple of minutes checking to see if the fever that had kept him for so many days still persisted, while the servants who had left before returned with clean clothes and food. 

“It's gone...” 

“Master Chang, we will clean Master Sandrock's room, we will take the food to the garden," said one of the servants. 

Quatre had a face of not understanding. As soon as the servants started to clean, he protested, he didn't want anyone to clean the room unless he did it himself. WuFei intervened, and reassured Quatre. 

“Okay... leave things as they are... when we need something, we’ll let you know.” 

The servants left for their work, and all calmer to see that the master was sane. 

Finally, WuFei guided Quatre to the garden where they had been served lunch. The young man looked more animated after eating as much as he could, and blushed every time he looked at him. They had eaten in silence, letting the sun warm his skin and give him some color. 

“I had... a dream. It was so strange... and I think I spent the night painting in the room, although I don't remember...” 

WuFei was watching him closely. He was lost in his eyes, he didn't want to expose him to anything he knew would happen, but everything was eventual. He had to prepare him for everything he had to do. 

“Master Quatre... you were locked in your room for 15 days... you painted every canvas inside; you even spent the early morning playing the kenghlin... you ate what was in your room, and you slept very little... or if you did. There are no records that anything like this has happened to Sandrock before, so it's something completely new...” 

“Are you tell me that I do things being unconscious?” 

“Apparently yes.” 

“Since I got here, one strange thing has happened to me after another ... I don't know what I'm surprised of.” 

“Master Quatre... I will help you clean your room.”