CHAPTER 15
909 Words
By the time Nick got across the street and into the garage, she was fuming. Rick had seen her coming, rather storming, from the diner and had the good sense to put his beer down and sit up straighter, though he wasn't smart enough to pull back the smirk that curved the edges of his lips.
“How was lunch?” he asked and lifted his brows with a teasing lilt in his voice.
“You’re an i***t,” she said, and she didn’t even slow down. She walked past him and into the bathroom, slammed the door behind her and left him gaping after her.
He gave her a moment, then walked the short distance to the door and tapped lightly on it. “Hey, Nick, open up.”
There was no answer. He couldn’t hear any sounds coming from the other side, so he knocked again.
“Nick, open up for me, sweetie,” he said softly, and he rapped on the door with two knuckles.
Nick stared at the mirror, determined to push her burgeoning emotions back to their familiar, muted state. She was not going to let him get to her. She was not going to let him make her feel things she didn’t want to feel. She was not going to let him ruin what little solace she had achieved.
She ran her fingers over her cheeks even though no tears had fallen, as if the action alone would discourage them from emerging from her heavy itchy eyes. She washed her hands, dried them on a couple of paper towels, then took a deep breath and opened the door.
Rick was leaning against the door jamb, his floppy dirty blonde hair hanging over his face, his head lowered, his ankles crossed, his hands connected behind his back.
“Creeper,” she muttered as she walked by and gently shoved his shoulder with her own.
“Loser.” He quickly followed her, and they went to the car she had just towed in.
“So…” he said after a moment when she had the car ready to mount on the raised bay.
“So what?”
“How was lunch?” he asked in a sing-song voice that annoyed her more than the question he posed.
“Drop it, Rick.”
“Nick.”
“Drop it.”
“Nicole!” he pleaded.
“Ricole!” she mocked back with a fake whining tone.
He pursed his lips and crossed his arms over his chest as she studied the underside of the car she had just lifted, as if it contained all the answers she sought.
“Nick-”
“Rick I swear-”
“Listen to me.” He interrupted quickly, held a hand up and showed her the flat of his palm to stop her from talking, then took a beat before he spoke again. “It’s time.”
She watched him mull over his next words and readied herself for the pain she knew she was about to feel. This was what all her preparation was for. This was why she never let herself connect, because connections made her weak. She was strong. She didn’t need anyone. She lowered her eyes and stared at the socket wrench she had in her hand.
“It’s time,” he said again. “It’s been six years.” He was speaking in a short staccato, pronouncing each word clearly. “It’s time you let someone in.”
“You don’t get to decide that,” she murmured so softly he barely heard her, so he leaned closer.
“Sorry?”
“I said…you don’t get to decide that.” Slowly she raised her eyes, then her head. She squared her shoulders and stood up to her full height so she was eye to eye with him. “Only I get to decide when it’s time. Me.”
“Six years. Are you going to carry it round forever?”
She narrowed her eyes and felt the hardened pit in her stomach expand, which brought with it a cool wash of control over her.
“It has been six years. And it will be another six years. And another six after that, if I want.” She leaned slightly forward and held his eyes for a moment before she spoke again. “And if I want to screw my way across the state of Illinois until then there is nothing you can do or say to stop me.”
“Nick, I’m not trying to make you change-”
“That’s exactly what you’re trying to do.”
“No, Nick!” he said, and he reached out to take her arm but she shrugged out of his touch and took a step back. “I’m just trying to say, it’s ok…it’s ok to want more, it’s ok to be scared, it’s ok!”
“Great. Thanks for the pep talk,” she said, and looked away from the hurt and frustrated look in Rick’s eyes. She didn't care that he was hurt and frustrated. She was hurt and frustrated too.
She turned away from him and started to prepare the car for the test leads. Rick watched her for a moment, then stepped back to give her the space she was craving. He wanted nothing more than to see her truly happy, but in the last six years she had never even come close.
- Writer
