Cassian POV
Being on my own f*****g sucks.
It’s hard to believe that I could feel this way about it because I’ve always really liked being alone. But something’s changed now.
Like when I see a bush with raspberries on it. This is a rare thing, and I want to tell Lyra about it, but she’s not here. I can’t.
I go over to the bush instead and pick handfuls of raspberries, eating as I go. I gorge myself on them.
Ordinarily, this is the kind of thing that would have made me happy. The sugar that’s flooding my system right now should definitely be improving my mood.
No such luck.
Frustrated, I lie on my back under the leaves and stare up through them at the sun overhead. At least it’s cool down here. That’s something. It’s definitely a restful place to spend the day.
Em would like it her
