The Man and the Moment

Chapter 13

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A whole month went by, and after the storm peace seemed to cover

Heronac. Sabine gardened with Pere Anselme, and listened to his kindly,

shrewd common sense, and then they read poetry in the afternoons when

tea was over. They read Beranger, Francois Villon, Victor Hugo, and

every now and then they even dashed into de Musset!

The good Father felt more easy in his mind. After all, his impressions

of Lord Fordyce's character had been very high, and he was not apt to

make mistakes in people--perhaps le bon Dieu meant to make an exception

in favor of the beloved Dame d'Heronac, and to find divorce a good

thing! Sabine had heard from Mr. Parsons that the negotiations had

commenced. It would be some time, though, before she could be free. She

must formally refuse to return when the demand asking her to do so

should come. This she was prepared to carry out. She firmly and

determinedly banished all thought of Michael from her mind, and hardly

ever went into the garden summer-house--because, when she did, she saw

him too plainly standing there in his white flannels, with the sprig of

her lavender in his coat and his bold blue eyes looking up at her with

their horribly powerful charm. The force of will can do such wonders

that, as the days went on, the pain and unrest of her hours lessened in

a great degree.

Every morning there came an adoring letter from Henry, in which he never

said too much or too little, but everything that could excite her

cultivated intelligence and refresh her soul. In all the after years of

her life, whatever might befall her, these letters of Henry's would have

a lasting influence upon her. They polished and moulded her taste; and

put her on her mettle to answer them, and gradually they grew to be an

absorbing interest. He selected the books she was to read, and sent her

boxes of them. It had been agreed before he left that he would not

return to Hronac for some time; but that in late October, when the

Princess and Mr. Cloudwater got back to Paris, that if they could be

persuaded to come to London, Sabine would accompany them, and make the

acquaintance of Henry's mother and some of his family--who would be in

ignorance of there being any tie between them, and the whole thing could

be done casually and with good sense.

"I want my mother and my sisters to love you, darling," Henry wrote,

"without a prejudiced eye. My mother would find you perfect, whatever

you were like, if she knew that you were my choice--and for the same

reason my sisters would perhaps find fault with you; so I want you to

make their conquest without any handicap."

Sabine, writing one of her long letters to Moravia in Italy, said:

I am very happy, Morri. This calm Englishman is teaching me such a

number of new aspects of life, and making me more determined than

ever to be a very great lady in the future. We are so clever in our

nation, and all the young vitality in us is so splendid, when it is

directed and does not turn to nerves and fads. I am growing so much

_finer_, my dear, under his guidance. You will know me when we

meet--because each day I grow more to understand.

The Pere Anselme had only one moment of doubt again, just the last

morning before his Dame d'Heronac left for Paris when October had come.

It was raining hard, and he found her in the great sitting-room with a

legal-looking document in her hand. Her face was very pale, and lying on

the writing-table beside her was an envelope directed and stamped.

It contained her refusal to return to her husband signed and sealed.

The old priest did not ask her any questions; he guessed, and

sympathized.

But his lady was too restless to begin their reading, and stole from

window to window looking out on the gray sea.

"I shall come here for six months in the year just as always, Father,"

she said at last. "I can never sever myself from Heronac."

"God forbid," exclaimed the priest, aghast. "If you left us, the sun no

more would seem to shine."

"And sometimes I will come--alone--because there will be times, my

Father, when I shall want to fight things out--alone."

The Pere Anselme took some steps nearer her, and after a moment said, in

a grave voice:

"Remember always, my daughter, that le bon Dieu settles things for us

mortals if we leave it all to Him--but if we take the helm in the

direction of our own affairs, it may be He will let circumstance draw us

into rough waters. In that case, the only thing for us is to be true to

our word and to our own souls--and to use common sense."

Sabine looked at him with somber, startled eyes.

"You mean, that I decided to help myself, Father--about the divorce--and

that now I must look only to myself--It is a terrible thought."

"You are strong, my child; it may be that you were directed from above,

I cannot say," and he shrugged his shoulders gently. "Only that the good

God is always merciful. What you must be is true to yourself. _Pax

vobiscum_," and he placed his hand upon her head.

But, for once, Sabine lost control of her emotions and, bursting into a

passion of tears, she rushed from the room.

"Alas! all is well?" said the priest, half aloud, and then he knelt by

the window and prayed fervently--without telling his beads.

But, at breakfast, Sabine's eyes were dry again, and she seemed quite

calm. She, too, had held communion with herself, and her will had once

more resumed the mastery. This should be the last exhibition of

weakness--and the last feeling of weakness; and as she would suppress

the outward signs, so she would crush the inner emotion. All life looked

smiling. She was young, healthy and rich. She had inspired the devoted

love of a good and great man, whose position would give scope for her

ambitions, whose intellect was a source of pleasure and joy to her, and

whose tenderness would smooth all her path. What right had she to have

even a crumpled rose leaf! None in the world.

She must get accustomed even to hearing of Michael, and perhaps to

meeting him again face to face, since Henry was never to know--or, at

least, not for years perhaps, when she had been so long happily married

that the knowledge would create no jar. And at all events, he need not

know--of the afterwards--that should remain forever locked in her heart.

Then she resolutely turned to lighter thoughts--her clothes in Paris,

the pleasure to see Moravia again--the excitement of her trip to

London, where she had never been, except to pass through that once long

ago.

The Pere Anselme came to the station with her, and as he closed the door

of the reserved carriage she was in, he said:

"Blessings be upon your head, my child. And, whatever comes, may the

good God direct you into peace."

Then he turned upon his heel, his black eyes dim--for the autumn months

would be long with only Madame Imogen for companion, beside his

flock--and the sea.

Michael had got back from Paris utterly disgusted with life, sick with

himself. Bitterly resentful against fate for creating such a tangled

skein, and dangling happiness in front of him only to snatch it away

again. He went up to Arranstoun and tried to play his part in the

rejoicings at his return. He opened the house, engaged a full staff of

servants, and filled it with guests. He shot with frantic eagerness for

one week, and then with indifference the next. Whatever he may have done

wrong in his life, his punishment had come. He had naturally an iron

will, and when he began to use it to calm his emotions, a better state

of things might set in, but for the time being he was just drifting, and

sorrow was his friend.

His suite at Arranstoun--which he had never seen since the day after his

wedding, having gone up to London that very next night, and from there

made all his arrangements for the China trip--gave him a shock--he who

had nerves of steel--and into the chapel he loathed to go. His one

consolation was that Binko, now seven years old, had not transferred his

affection to Alexander Armstrong, with whom he had spent the time; but

after an hour or two had rapturously appeared to remember his master,

and now never, if he could help it, left his side.

Michael took to reading books--no habit of his youth!--although his

shrewd mind had not left him in the usual plight of blank ignorance,

which is often the portion of a splendid, young athlete leaving Eton!

But now he studied subjects seriously, and the whys and wherefores of

things; and he grew rather to enjoy the evenings alone, between the

goings and comings of his parties, when, buried in a huge chair before

his log fire, with only Binko's snorts for company, he could pore over

some volume of interest. He studied his family records, too, getting all

sorts of interesting documents out of his muniment room.

What a fierce, brutal lot they had always been! No wonder the chapel had

to be so gloriously filled--and then there came to his memory the one

little window which was still plain, and how he had told Sabine that he

supposed it had been left for him to garnish--as an expiatory

offering--the race being so full of rapine and sin!

Should he put the gorgeous glass in now--it was time. But a glass

window could not prevent the punishment--since it had already fallen

upon him, nor even alleviate the suffering.

He was staring straight in front of him at the picture of Mary, Queen of

Scots', landing--it had been painted at about 1850, when romantic

subjects of that sort were in vogue, and "the fellow in the blue

doublet" was said, by the artist, to represent the celebrated Arranstoun

of that time. The one who had killed a Moreton and stolen his wife. No

doubt that is why his grandfather had bought it. He thought it looked

very well over the secret door, and then he deliberately let himself

picture how it had once fallen forward, and all the circumstances which

had followed in consequence. He reconstructed every word he could

remember of his and Sabine's conversation that afternoon. He repictured

her innocent baby face--and from there on to the night of the wedding.

He reviewed all his emotions in the chapel, and the strange exaltation

which was upon him then--and the mad fire which awoke in his blood with

his first kiss or of her fresh young lips when the vows were said. Every

minute incident was burned into his memory until the cutting of the

cake--after that it seemed to be a chaos of wild passion, and moments of

extraordinary bliss. He suddenly could almost see her little head there

unresisting on his breast, all tears and terror at last hushed to rest

by his fond caresses--and then he started from his seat--the memory was

too terribly sweet.

He had, of course, been the most frightful brute. Nothing could alter or

redeem that fact; but when sleep came to them at length he had believed

that he had made her forgive him, and that he could teach her to love

him and have no regrets. Then the agony to wake and find her gone!

What made her go after all? How had she slipped from his arms without

awakening him? If he had only heard her when she was stealing from the

room, he could have reasoned with her, and even have again caught her

and kissed her into obedience--but he had slept on.

He remembered all his emotions--rage at her daring to cross his will to

begin with, and then the deep wound to his self-love. That is what had

made him write the hard letter which forever put an end to their

reunion.

"What a paltry, miserable, arrogant wretch I was then," he thought--"and

how pitifully uncontrolled."

But all was now too late.

The next morning's post brought him a letter from Henry Fordyce, in

which he told him he had been meaning to write to him ever since he had

returned from France more than a month ago, but had been too occupied.

The whole epistle breathed ecstatic happiness. He was utterly absorbed

in his lady love, it was plain to be seen, and since his mind seemed so

peaceful and joyous, it was evident she must reciprocate. Well, Henry

was worthy of her--but this in no way healed the hurt. Michael violently

tore up the letter and bounded from his bed, passion boiling in him

again. He wanted to slay something; he almost wished his friend had been

an enemy that he could have gone out and fought with him and reseized

his bride. What matter that she should be unwilling--the Arranstoun

brides had often been unwilling. She had been unwilling before, and he

had crushed her resistance, and even made her eventually show him some

acquiescence and content. He could certainly do it again, and with more

chance of success, since she was a woman now and not a child, and would

better understand emotions of love.

He stood there shaking with passion. What should he do? What step should

he take? Then Binko, who had emerged from his basket, gave a tiny

half-bark--he wanted to express his sympathy and excitement. If his

beloved master was transported with rage, it was evidently the moment

for him to show some feeling also, and to go and seize by the throat man

or beast who had caused this tumult.

His round, faithful, adoring eyes were upturned, and every fat wrinkle

quivered with love and readiness to obey the smallest command, while he

snorted and slobbered with emotion. Something about him touched Michael,

and made him stoop and seize him in his arms and roll the solid mass on

the bed in rough, loving appreciation.

"You understand, old man!" he cried fondly. "You'd go for Henry or

anyone--or hold her for me"--And then the passion died out of him, as

the dog licked his hand. "But we have been brutes once too often, Binko,

and now we'll have to pay the price. She belongs to Henry, who's behaved

like a gentleman--not to us any more."

So he rang for his valet and went to his bath quietly, and thus ended

the storm of that day.

And Henry Fordyce in London was awaiting the arrival of his

well-beloved, who, with the Princess and Mr. Cloudwater, was due to be

at the Ritz Hotel that evening, when they would dine all together and

spend a time of delight.

And far away in Brittany, the Pere Anselme read in his book of

meditations:

It is when the sky is clearest that the heaviest bolt falls--it

would be well for all good Christians to be on the alert.

And chancing to look from his cottage window, he perceived that a heavy

rain cloud had gathered over the Chateau of Heronac.

In the 1600s, Balthasar Gracian, a jesuit priest wrote 300 aphorisms on living life called "The Art of Worldly Wisdom." Join our newsletter below and read them all, one at a time.