CHAPTER THREE
1214 Words
I didn’t sleep last night.
I’ve been trying to convince myself it was the usual anxiety before a big deal. I’ve had sleepless nights before—long stretches of tossing and turning, staring at the ceiling, counting the number of imaginary tiles. But it’s never felt like this. This is different.
I glance at the clock on my phone: 3:22 AM. The early morning stillness offers no comfort, only a hollow echo in the silence. My brain is on overdrive. What will I say to him? How do I face him after all these years? A part of me is itching to finally see Adrian—to understand why he’s re-entering my life, but there’s another part, a bigger part, that’s terrified. What if I haven’t changed as much as I thought?
I try to calm myself by focusing on the numbers on the screen, hoping the familiar rhythm will lull me back to sleep. But the quiet only amplifies my racing thoughts. His face keeps flashing in my mind—how he used to look at me, the way his hand would casually rest on the small of my back. I remember those moments so vividly, it’s almost painful.
By 6:00 AM, I give up on the idea of sleep altogether. There’s no point fighting it.
I pull myself out of bed, heading to the bathroom, and take one long look in the mirror. The reflection staring back at me looks pale, worn out. My eyes are heavy with exhaustion, and my hair is a mess from the restless night. I splash cold water on my face, hoping to jolt myself awake.
I wonder if he’s changed at all—if his eyes are still that piercing blue, if he still has that crooked smile I once found irresistible. No. Stop. This isn’t about him. This is about business, Lia. Focus.
By the time I’m dressed and in my office, the adrenaline is keeping me upright. It’s funny how autopilot takes over when you’re too tired to think. I sit at my desk, scrolling through emails, trying to prep for the possible meeting, but my mind keeps wandering. Every sentence I read becomes a blur. I can’t shake the anxiety.
Chloe is the first to notice. She barges into my office mid-morning, holding a ridiculous-looking croissant sandwich from the bakery around the corner, crumbs already on her sleeve.
“Wow, you look like someone stole your dog,” she quips, plopping herself down in the chair across from me and waving the sandwich like a peace offering.
I force a smile, but I know it doesn’t fool her. “Rough night.”
“Clearly.” She takes a bite of the sandwich, chewing thoughtfully before continuing. “You’re thinking about Adrian, aren’t you?”
I don’t respond right away. I don’t need to. Chloe knows me better than anyone.
“It’s… complicated,” I finally mutter, staring at the desk. My fingers trace the edge of the coffee cup in front of me.
“Of course it is,” she says with a sigh, leaning back in her chair and crossing her arms. “The guy was your first love, Lia. No one gets over that easily, not even when they screw up as royally as he did.”
I let out a small laugh, though it doesn’t reach my eyes. “I thought I had. I really did.”
Chloe softens, her voice quieter now. “Maybe you did. Or maybe some parts of us don’t ever completely get over certain people. That doesn’t mean you want him back.”
I shake my head, rubbing my temples. “I don’t want him back. I don’t even know if I want him in the same room as me.”
Chloe watches me for a moment, as though weighing her next words carefully. “Maybe this is your chance. Not for closure—that word is overrated anyway—but for you to finally see him as just another guy.”
Another guy. The idea is laughable, but at the same time, it’s what I desperately want. To be indifferent. To see him and feel nothing. God, wouldn’t that be liberating?
The hours drag by. Every time the phone rings, I jump, half-expecting it to be Megan announcing Adrian’s arrival. But it never is.
By late afternoon, I’m too wound up to sit still. My office feels like a cage, and I need air. I grab my jacket and wander out into the hallway, making my way toward the rooftop garden. The small space is my sanctuary—an oasis of calm above the city noise. I’ve spent countless hours up here, trying to quiet my mind, to make sense of the chaos below. Today, though, even the plants feel like they’re mocking me, swaying gently in the breeze as if everything’s fine.
I lean against the railing, looking out over the skyline. A dull ache settles in my chest. I don’t know why I’m this nervous. It’s been years. We’ve both moved on. Right?
But then again, we never really had a proper ending. Our breakup had been more of a slow fizzle—fights that led to silence, more distance than closeness, until we stopped trying altogether. There was no closure, no final conversation. Just… nothing.
The thought of him seeing me now, with my own brand, my own life, should fill me with pride. But instead, there’s an insecurity gnawing at me. What if I’m not as over him as I thought? What if seeing him again unearths feelings I’ve buried for so long?
I close my eyes and let the cool breeze brush against my skin. It calms me a little, but not enough to rid me of the knot twisting in my stomach. Would he see me as weak for still being affected by him? Or would he even care at all?
The door creaks open behind me. I tense, spinning around, half-expecting it to be him. But it’s Megan, her face apologetic as she approaches me.
“Sorry to interrupt, Lia,” she says, wringing her hands nervously. “I just got word that the Mountain Co. meeting… it’s been rescheduled. Adrian’s still tied up with other business.”
My heart drops, though I can’t tell if it’s from relief or disappointment. There’s a hollow feeling in my chest, like the anticipation was sucked out, leaving a void.
“Okay,” I say, my voice more steady than I feel. “Thanks for letting me know.”
Megan hovers for a moment as if waiting for some kind of reaction. When I give none, she nods and slips back out.
I turn back toward the skyline, releasing a breath I hadn’t realized I was holding. The meeting is postponed—but it’s not canceled. It’s coming, like a storm I can’t avoid. And with it, everything I’ve tried to keep buried might come crashing back to the surface.
I close my eyes again, letting the wind wash over me. I remind myself, this time, I’m in control. Whatever Adrian’s reasons are for coming back into my life, they don’t define me anymore.
I’m not the same girl I was. And neither is he. At least, I hope not.
- Writer
