The Wolf Within

How To Begin

** Lia’s POV **

As the elevator doors opened, my heart sank. Dakota was up on the walkway, staring at me with big eyes filled with terror. Great, she hates me for sharing a room with her last night. I knew it. I knew I should have gone to a different room! 

“Hey,” I said, with a small smile as I raised her tea in the air. “I’ve got your tea here.” I hoped that would break the awkwardness which occupied the space between us. However, I stayed where I was and waited for her to give me permission to move closer, just in case. 

However, she stayed perfectly still and only moved to bite her lip instead as a flash of panic crossed her eyes. Then she called out, louder than necessary, “Are you a werewolf?”

Well s**t. I was not prepared for that. “Um…” I hesitated. Half of me was so relieved that she had figured it out, the other half of me was scared senseless to think that the fear written all over her was actually a fear of me. I closed my eyes and took in a deep breath. Her nervousness was palpable, and all I wanted to do was comfort her. 

I opened my eyes and exhaled, then looked up at her with all the comforting feelings I could muster in such a tense situation. “First things first,” I heard myself saying. I paused for another moment as I tried to find the right words. Goddess, help me. “I want you to know that you are completely safe here.” 

“That doesn’t answer my question.” Dakota stated, her face now colored with a hint of coldness.

“I know. I just,” I paused again and set my coffee on the nightstand and clutched her tea with both hands. “I promise to answer all of your questions. May I come up there first?” The only way I would be able to get through this conversation was if I knew I could hold her at a moment's notice if she had a meltdown. I stood, waiting once again for permission. 

She gave the tiniest little nod and whispered, “Don’t forget your coffee.” I smirked a little as I grabbed it and made my way up to her, so she wants me to be comfortable even when she’s upset. 

As I neared the top of the stairs, I held out her cup of tea which she hesitated to take. She watched me for a moment, unsure of whether or not she could trust me. “I promise, it’s just tea, not poison. You can smell it to make sure if you’d like.” I joked. She only grimaced, apparently it was far too soon for jokes. 

Dakota brought the cup of tea to her nose and sniffed the small hole of the travel lid, then looked at me as she moved it to her lips. “It’s ok, really.” I assured her and with that, she took a small sip and I was rewarded with a small smile. “Is it good?” I asked. “I wasn’t sure if you liked cream and sugar, or lemon. I decided to go with cream and sugar. I hope that’s alright.” I added. 

She nodded, “It’s good.” She looked back down at the cup and whispered, “you still haven’t answered my question.” Her eyes met mine again, this time, they held something different. When I was down by the elevator I couldn’t quite see it, but as I sat next to her, it was plain as day: pure vulnerability. 

“Oh sweetheart,” I heard myself say before I could think about it. I blushed a little as I tried my best to stop myself from wrapping my arms around her. She was in an extremely difficult spot and, even though I was her mate, she might not be ready for that level of intimacy. No matter how ready I was. I continued, “It’s all going to be alright. I promise.” I looked down at my own coffee, why am I so nervous? I thought to myself. This feels like coming out all over again. I let out a deep sigh, shut my eyes and said, “Yes. I am a werewolf.” 

I wanted to see her, I wanted to look into her eyes and see that it would all be alright, but I was completely petrified. She already hates me for sharing the room with her last night, there is no way she is going to accept this. 

** Dakota’s POV **

“Yes. I am a werewolf.” Lia said and immediately fell silent. I could hear her breathing harder and waited for her to continue. As the silence permeated the space between us, I chanced a look at her. Her eyes were shut tight and her jaw muscles rippled as she clenched it shut.

I had no idea asking that question would be so hard for her, but her answer was even harder for me to believe. For twenty-seven years I had been told that they were one of the many creatures that were solely myths and legends. They never really existed. Yet, here I was, having a supposed conversation with a werewolf. My mind remained shut down, unable to process the information which had overloaded it for the past half hour, save for one voice. 

As I stared, blatantly, at Lia’s clenching jaw, my supposed wolf brain piped up. 

WB: I know we have been told time and time again that werewolves don't exist. That your feelings weren’t valid. That I’m not real, but please. Ask her. Look at her Dakota. She has the same injury as that wolf. Ask her to explain how she got it. I swear, it will prove to you that you aren’t crazy and that I really do exist. 

I sat there and willed my mouth to open, to ask the question I now wanted answered so badly. Yet, as I sat there, the words refused to come to the surface. I decided to rehearse in my head, it was then I remembered that Lia had responded to one of my thoughts only a few moments earlier.

Lia, if you can hear me, answer this question out loud. How did you get that injury on your shoulder?

To my great and yet, not so great surprise, the theory proved to be true. Lia opened her dark eyes and looked deep into mine. Her face and body radiated her honest intentions as Lia began, “Well, last night--”

** Lia’s POV **

With each moment of silence, my stomach sank deeper and deeper as dread began to take over. It got to the point that I was sure that if I opened my eyes, Dakota would no longer be there. I knew better because I could hear her heartbeat quicken in response to the stressful answer I had just given her. However, no one ever said werewolves were always rational, and my own anxieties started to mess with my mind.

Just as I was about to bury my head in my hands, ready to cry from such a painful, nonverbal rejection a thought pierced through my scared mind. 

Lia, if you can hear me, answer this question out loud. How did you get that injury on your shoulder? 

I opened my eyes in surprise and the tiniest bit of hope set in seeing that she was really still there. I set my coffee down, and looked deep into her eyes.  Searching them for a clue to how she might be feeling. The blue of them now turned a stormy sea green as they readied themselves for an onslaught of tears, no doubt in response to such a high level of stress. My heart melted at seeing her pain and I yearned to hold her in my arms, but she didn’t ask for that. She asked about my injury. 

“Well, last night I had gotten some frustrating news from a close member of the pack and I decided I wanted to see you again. I decided that I couldn’t wait until morning and shifted hoping that you would be more receptive to seeing my wolf form again and maybe even call me about it the next day. However, as I got to the edge of the forest, I saw a hunter stalking his way up to your porch.” As I explained what had happened, I could feel the hairs on the back of my neck stand up and my voice grew hoarse and gravelly.

My wolf felt threatened again just at the thought of our mate in danger. I clenched my eyes shut again and took a deep breath, I tried to calm myself as much as I could. As I did so, I felt Dakota’s hand rest on my left forearm, which sent sparks all over my skin. After a moment, my anger melted away as my wolf realized that our mate was safe and sound near us. 

I opened my eyes again and went to lay my hand on hers, before I did, I glanced up into her eyes for permission. She gave me a small smile and, with that, I covered her hand with mine.I continued, “I saw how scared you got and then I heard the whistle. That blasted thing.” I spat the last sentence out as I remembered the growing list of pack members, from not only my pack but the surrounding ones as well, who had disappeared. I looked back to Dakota and saw confusion on her face, so I explained. “That thing, when blown, bothers our wolves so deeply that it forces us to shift. The shift only stays for a few seconds, but to a trained hunter, it’s plenty of time to confirm their suspicions. You, however,” I looked down at her hand and began to caress it with my thumb, “didn’t.” I stated, and met her gaze again.

“Even though you didn’t shift, I knew he wasn’t going to leave you alone. I couldn’t bear to see you hurt, or worse. So, I did what I had to do and attacked.” Her eyes widened as I said this, fear creeping in again. “I tried my best to protect you,” I said quickly, I needed her to remember that I wasn’t a scary wolf. I wanted her to know that I was her wolf. “As I did that,” I started again, “he fired the gun.” 

As I said that, my shoulder burned with phantom pains. I was mostly healed by this time, but the area still hurt a bit. 

“May I see?” Dakota asked, as she removed her hand from my forearm and stared at my bandage.

“Um, sure. I mean, there isn’t much to see now, it’s mostly healed.” I replied as I moved the strap of my tank top down my shoulder and began to peel away the bandage.

She leaned in closer to see the small scar from the entry wound better. Her face was blank as she brought her hand up and ran her finger over the scar. “Told you, mostly healed. Call it a perk of being a werewolf.” I laughed. 

She didn’t. Instead she just stared back at me, completely unsure. “I’m sorry,” she started, “but I don’t know if I believe you.” Her voice was still quiet, though it carried notes of suspicion. “All of this is just,” she paused as she gestured to everything around her, “too much to take in.” She gave an exasperated chuckle and said, “seriously, when do the cameras come out and everyone tell me I’m on a reality prank show?”

“What could I do to prove it to you?” I asked quickly. Please, Goddess help me. 

“Show me.” She said, her eyes looking deep into my soul as she did. “Show me your wolf.”