SAINTS DON’T MOAN

Chapter 20

Penelope

God was washing away my sins. He was purging me with his rain from above, purging my impure thoughts about Miguel. I began to sob as I ran down the seemingly endless path. I was in so much distress that I could not appreciate the view of the lake as the rain covered the waters above with the one below. At the moment I was experiencing a picturesque nightmare.

I tried to run faster, hoping the view of Miguel’s house would come into view but I could not see what was in front of me. The rain blinded me so all I could make out was a blurred view of the pavement in front of me.

I stopped momentarily to clean my face and I saw him then—Miguel standing in the rain like a f*****g greek god carved like a statue from the classical greek era. Even with my blurred vision, I could still see that he was sexy. He was so sexy that I wanted to strip off the shirt that clung to his upper body, exposing his perfect abs and toned muscles. I wanted nothing more than to gobble this man up and yet I had to practice restraint. I could not jump him because I had made the decision to become Jesus’ eternal bride.

My chest welled up with anger the more my desire grew. It felt like God was testing me, asking me if I was really ready to be joined with him forever. And yet I stood there, looking at Miguel petrified, angry with him for being so goddamn sexy. Miguel was quite literally my own forbidden fruit. So close and within reach and yet full of knowledge that would poison me forever.

And because I could not have him, I had to vent my frustration at him so I yelled, “You just left!”

My scream was so loud that it may have drowned the rain but I did not care. I did not care if my voice reached the church ahead or if it reached heaven above. I just needed to scream my gut out.

“And then left me? How the hell was I supposed to find my way back under this dreary weather?”

I was not sure I was making much sense. All that mattered was that I was communicating how anguished I felt on the inside. I was quiet for a while, waiting for Miguel’s defensive response. Instead, I was rewarded with silence. Clearly, he did not care that I was drenched from the rain. He just stood there and watched me like he was secretly amused.

“You… just get out of my way,” I yelled some more, walking past him furiously. The least he could do was to pretend that he cared! It was the only thing I was asking for!

As I ascended the front porch where there was finally shade from the heavy rain, I wiped my eyes clean. I turned back once and Miguel had yet to move. My eyes had a mind of their own as my gaze lowered to his buttocks. His trousers were wet and standing in the rain, he looked like he was wearing tights. A gasp escaped my lips as my eyes took in his firm well rounded buttocks. There ought to be a special place in hell for men who dared to have such nice ass.

I swallowed, trying to contain my lust as I turned to face forward.

I opened the heavy brass door and stumbled immediately into a tall bulky man. I almost fell over at just how breathtaking he looked.

Why Lord?

Why send these temptations my way now?

“Sister Pene…”

I sauntered inside, locating my room as quickly as I could before any more lustful thoughts could settle on my mind.

“Damien!” I heard Miguel’s voice faintly as I closed my room door.

I shut my eyes and allowed my imagination take over.

His voice in my ear, his hands on my face, his tongue welding with mine… caressing, kneading, exploring, kissing just about every entry point in my body…

His big hands were on my breasts, touching, squeezing, teasing my n*****s…

Clack!

The sound startled me out of my lurid thoughts. I opened my eyes and saw that my rosary had fallen from my wrist to the ground, giving me a rude awakening. My heart raced as I faced the choice to heed God’s warning by picking up my prayer bead or take my hands off my breasts as they held on for dear pleasure.

“You’re a saint,” I said softly, addressing no one but myself, “you’re a saint.”

I repeated the words over and over until I fought my animal urge to rub my groin on any hard surface just to climax.

I let go of my breast and inhaled and exhaled loudly.

One thing was certain though, I could not remain in this room any longer. I had to escape myself.

So I stripped my clothes quickly and changed into my habit, picking up my rosary and wearing it on my neck. I looked at my reflection in the full length mirror and was satisfied with the deception. No one looking at me now would think that just seconds ago I was close to an orgasm.

I exhaled loudly again.

This was the way to go.

The only downside was that I would have to return into the rain but that was a lot better than having to deal with my lust alone in this room.

As I felt a slight tingle between my legs, I ran to the door and opened the door with the speed of someone escaping a predator.

I shut my door softly and walked through the corridor with unhurried steps. I stopped when I heard the voice of a man I assumed was Miguel’s friend, “Who knew the great and sexy Miguel Ramirez could be this insecure? huh?”

“I am not…” Miguel began to defend himself but was interrupted by the sound of someone pounding the door heavily.

I came out of the hallway into view of the large parlour but no one could see me. The two men had their backs to me while their attention remained on the door.

“What the hell Claudia?” I heard Miguel ask.

“I’m really sorry,” I knew the voice of that woman and it filled me at once with contempt, “I was in the neighbourhood when it began pouring and this was the closest place I knew.”

She was definitely lying. If it was a shelter she required, she could have visited the church nearby.

“You can't come in here, Claudia,” Miguel’s tone was surprisingly firm, “I'll order uber for you to…”

But his friend who stood just inches behind Miguel inched closer to see who the unwelcome visitor was.

“Who’s there?” he asked.

He gently pushed Miguel aside and allowed Claudia to enter the house. I wanted badly to punch his dummy head.

“Let’s be hospitable to those in need,” I heard him say, which caused me to roll my eyes.

“Thank you,” Claudia's eyes had shifted to Damien which made me feel better just a little bit.

“I’m Justin River,” Miguel’s friend introduced himself to her, “what's your name, pretty woman?”

I cleared my throat to announce my presence because it felt suddenly like I was in some weird porno movie and this was the foreplay for all the involved characters.

The three of them instantly turned to look at me.

“I’ll be attending Vespers,” I announced, trying not to look at Claudia’s huge breasts which were visible in the transparent dress made even more sultry by the rain.

“Is there an umbrella I can borrow?” I asked, choosing to look up because it was the only place my eyes were safe from this lust-haven.

“I can drive you,” Miguel offered but I shook my head immediately.

“Absolutely not,” I said, keeping my refusal firm.

“There’s an umbrella under the kitchen sink,” Miguel said, “I’ll get it…”

But I was on my way to the kitchen before he could complete his sentence.

I found the umbrella and walked immediately to the backdoor of the house situated in the kitchen. There was no need to torment myself by going through the front door. But just before I could make an escape, Miguel appeared in the kitchen, blocking my path entirely with his still soaked body.

“You’ll catch a cold if you go out in the rain,” he said, his tone low and filled with a dangerous obsession that slowly peeled at layers of my resolve.

“Why do you care?” I hated that my voice had grown weak.

“It would be a pity if you could not work tomorrow,” replied Miguel unfeelingly, “I wouldn’t want to lose a volunteer staff to the rain.”

His words angered me.

I pushed past his bulky frame, opened the door and stepped out into the heavy rain.