CHAPTER 12: NIGHTMARE DECISIONS
1036 Words
Allison's POV
"What the hell did I just do?" I hit my hand to my lap as I felt my rear getting swallowed by the bed's thick velvet.
There was an agonizing feeling growing terribly cold in my belly. I tried to kiss him. The thought of it seemed like it would haunt me for a long long time. The image got right in my mind space once again. An embarrassing sight. Why did I ever think that he would kiss me back?
I face-palmed myself with both my hands, each flat on my face. I wished I could cry out all the anguish I felt within me, but nothing at all seemed to come of it.
The more I thought about it, the more it seemed to me that it would be better if I just crawled under a rock and lived the rest of my life under it. At least, no one would bother me there.
I fell on the bed, bending over my legs, and continued talking to myself. It was the only thing ironically keeping me sane.
All through the night, the entire ordeal continued playing to no end in my mind, until I fell asleep, crouched like a rat that had been poured really hot water.
My eyes opened up to a set of blue eyes staring down at me. Blue, as though the sky got swallowed up in all its Infinity into two tiny holes in his face. .
Once again, I drew myself in for a kiss, and he kissed me back. In my stomach, butterflies that I thought were so long dead got resuscitated, sprang back to life, and fluttered within me, causing an unending spiral of emotions.
But when we broke from the kiss, I saw that it was no longer Dylan. It was Aiden who was standing before me, his look sliced by a smile, his teeth on display just as he had done that day I was thrown in jail.
And then, again, I found myself behind bars. "What? What am I doing here? I promise I did not do anything. He is lying. Please I tell you, he is lying. I don't even do drugs. Laura showed up, standing just beside Aiden. She smirked at me, and then pulling Aiden towards herself, she kissed him.
"I am not guilty" I woke up saying. It was just a dream. My first conscious morning breath was one of relief.
My eyes moved towards the window. The crescent moon had been replaced by an orange sun. The sight of birds flying past it fed my mind an image of an artwork I saw in the hallway just the day before.
Speaking of yesterday, the memory of trying to kiss Dylan caused me to cringe right down to my bones. An icy feeling overwhelmed me.
"You know what?" I began. "Don't think about it. Just move on. Act like it never happened."
I stood up from the bed, stumbling from place to place. How long had it been since I slept in a bed? I thought. Two years in jail is not a joke; neither is it a laughing matter.
A knock came on the door. I already knew who it was. There was no one else either way.
"I'm coming." I moved towards the door and opened it, simultaneously dressing myself and my hair and wondering at all why I was even doing any of it when he clearly had said to me yesterday that he did not find me attractive.
Sometimes it's hard being a woman. You have to look good even though you don't have to.
I opened the door and found no one there.
"Here," a familiar voice said from below.
My eyes traveled below to find the old lady from yesterday grinning proudly at me.
"Did you think I would not find you?" she asked.
"Grandma... Brittany's Grandma" I said with forced excitement.
"Ehh... You don't have to deceive yourself that you are excited to see me." I could not believe it, she could tell that I was putting on a show.
"I'm sorry, Brittany's Grandma."
"You can just call me Estella. That is my name."
"Alright, Grandma Estella," I said, now propping up for the big question. "How did you find me?"
"Nah, I won't tell. An old lady has her secrets, just as much as you young people have your secrets. I should be the one asking the question here. It seemed like you had seen a ghost yesterday, I mean when you began running from Brittany and me."
"Oh," I exclaimed, placing my hand on my head, genuinely having nothing at all to say to redeem myself. "I am sorry." The words dropped from my mouth like a heavy weight from my shoulders.
"But it was not really you" I continued. "Grandma Brittany, I mean, Grandma Estella, I have been through a lot of things in the last two years. I am sorry that affected our first interaction."
"You don't need to explain, my child. I am an old lady. I have seen a lot of life to know that life is never unfair. But the best thing to do is to keep moving forward. To forge ahead despite your losses. Do you understand that? I do."
I nodded slowly, quite unsure of what to say to her. There was a sound of footsteps heading toward our direction.
"Who is this?" Dylan's voice asked.
"Oh." I stared at the corner where his voice was filtering from and caught his blue eyes. He was writing black body-hugging clothes that quite certainly revealed and drew out his muscular frame.
..." She is just my friend's grandma,," I managed to say in the middle of m,e, totally drooling excessively over his body.
"Wow, is this him?" The old lady winked at me. "Is this your husband?"
I stammered, trying to find words to say.
"Y, yes," he answered in my place. "Allison get ready. We should be going now. Today we are going to see my mom."
"Oulala, what a lucky girl you are" Grandma Estelle exclaimed, her old cheeks filled red hot. She literally had no idea what she was talking about.
- Writer
