Beautiful Ruins

Chapter#04

He had been feeling suffocated since what happened after school ended.His feeling were too jumbled up to stop at just one emotion. He felt frustrated, annoyed, angry and at the same time he wanted to run away from all this. Watching even the tiniest of fight, woke memories he didn't wanted to remember. But like a buzzing sound in his ear, it just never seem to leave him alone. He didn't wanted to be angry, didn't wanted to feel anything which would turn into regret later on. It has only been two days, two days of knowing her and he had been through more emotions then last two years.

To clear his thoughts, he had decided to go for a stroll and a smoke. A habit he had a love/hate relation with. Though he only started an year back, it had became quiet worse in very little time. But, he also didn't wanted to break this habit, didn't wanted to have a clear head all the time.

He had just walked out from his street to the road when he saw through the dim streets lights, a figure running with two men fast on her/his heels. Before he could think it through, his cigarette was on the ground and he was running and shouting at the same time.

Also immediately, the two men who he couldn't care to properly look at paused and start running in the opposite direction.

He turned to ask the person if they were okay and his eyes widen in surprise.

"Ace!" he called her out in surprise and annoyance. The annoyance was more towards himself and his lack of emotional control rather then towards the girl who was not even aware of doing anything wrong.

"Daniel! Thanks for that. What are you doing here?" her voice sounded even, unafraid. Normal.

Why are you at least not breathless? He wanted to ask but he saw no right to question.

She was smiling and seemed much different then how he had seen her previously. She seemed genuine, like a real person without a mask on. There was no indifference on her face or blankness in her eyes. The little source of light he had didn't hide the fact that she looked exhilarated. A very unnatural emotion to have under such circumstances.

"I was out for a smoke." he replied but his words sounded confused even to his own ears.

He didn't even realize when they naturally fell into steps and started walking.

"You live in this street?" she asked pointing at the street after his.

"No, the one before this one. What are you doing out so late at night?" he got to the main question which was bugging him.

"I was shopping."

It was then he noticed the bags in our hands. They looked heavy.

"C'mon, I'll walk you home." Despite the warning bells and hours of self lectures, he made the judgement quiet opposite of it all. Almost unconsciously, he had already taken the bags from her hand and had start walking. It was after few steps he realized that Ace was not following him.

He turned to ask her what was wrong and found her just staring at him, in confusion and there was certain blankness in her eyes like she had bit of her mask on. He couldn't found any words to say and just let her think whatever she was thinking through.

After a while, her expressions cleared but she didn't go back to being excited again but seem quiet normal. She wasn't indifferent but just casual. He wondered how many more masks she had in her collection.

She fell into steps with him and led him to her house. When they reached, he handed her, her bags and wished her goodnight except she didn't move. She seemed to be waiting for something.

"Aren't you going to leave?" she asked, genuinely looking confused.

"I will after you go inside." At least this is what his father have taught him.

"Why?" now she sounded more curiously then confused.

"Wha....why....? I..don't know." he answered, getting a little flustered. Wasn't that the basic manner?

"Oh." she said and then went inside without a word but she had turned to throw him a confused glance before closing the door behind herself.

He took a deep breathe to calm himself down. His ears felt hot despite the cold air.

The next day, he was having lunch in a burger joint with Matt. Though they were suspended, their parents weren't the kind to make a big deal out of such issues. Matt especially had very casual dads. They both were very free spirited and believed in freedom of expression. And they were extremely loud, maybe that was the reason Matt turned into such a quiet guy.

Andy and James weren't as lucky. Andy had 9 other siblings. His house already looked like a asylum on normal days with his two pair of very young twin siblings, it was a pair of girls and then boys. They only had an year of age difference and were very much like Andy in nature so it wasn't hard to guess how his mother must have reacted after knowing she would have to bear Andy home for two days as well He was probably slaving away at home doing chores.

James being from a single parent house, had to go to his part time job whenever he had extra time.

"What's been up with you these days?"

He raised his head from the food to look at Matt who was already staring at him with a calm face.

"What do you mean?" he asked, rubbing his thigh in nervousness.

"You have been so aggregated from past two days. Did something happened?" he asked while dipping his fry in milkshake.

Daniel went silent. He was thinking over whether he should say something or not. Matt was a very trustworthy person but how do he explain something to him, he himself didn't understand. And there was a part of him which was very afraid. Afraid that he might get answers from Matt, he is not ready for or dislike because he had a feeling that all his emotions had a very simple explanation but what exactly was it, he didn't know.

But he wanted to let it out. He wanted someone to give him an answer so he can decide what to do next, how to run away or how to stop.

"It's...Ace." he slowly said like he was testing the grounds.

Matt looked at him in surprise.

"Ace? Ace Adams?" he demanded like he was making sure.

Daniel nodded and slowly continued, "I am confused myself. When I first met her, there wasn't much. Sometime how she acted, it reminded me of how he did. I don't know why, I just felt a strong sense of similarity between them even though at the same time, they are nothing alike. It is scary and tiresome at the same time. I just want to stop being involved with her and yet I can't seem to do it." he didn't need to explain who he was talking about being similar to Ace, Matt knew already which was probably why he looked startled.

"You are noticing her." it wasn't a question but a statement which muddled Daniel.

Matt seeing that he didn't understand smiling softly and explained, "You are noticing her. Though you have probably met her more times then I have, you noticed these changes in her behavior. I didn't. In fact, I think nobody did. You are aware of her. Though, she is very pretty but to heed her at such level within so few days...." Matt stopped, his expression turned that of someone who was thinking furiously.

Pretty? She was pretty?

Daniel was unfortunately someone who had no awareness of ugly or pretty. For him, if the person had two eyes, a nose and mouth- it was normal. If they were didn't- they were disfigures. It was simple as that and these were the only two category he knew of but defining Ace as pretty, how would he know she is?

"Tell me, do you dislike her?" Matt suddenly asked.

"Dislike her? No, not all. I would say I have neither feeling of like or dislike towards her." Daniel answered with a shrug.

To his surprise Matt looked at him like he was a joke.

"Suuuurrreee..." He said like he didn't believe what nonsense he was speaking and then continued to asked, "Even though you believe she is similar to him, you don't dislike her?"

Matt's question had him froze in his mind because what he had said was true, even if he found her similar- he didn't dislike her. He had felt afraid of what she could be capable of but to dislike her, he had never thought of that. She didn't repel him and he didn't scorn her. He just felt angry and confused and annoyed, all at the same time.

"Daniel...."

"Hmm?" He shook his head and looked at Matt. He knew what his expressions would be like now. He knew he looked like he was terrified by what was coming next.

"Think through your emotions again, maybe- just maybe you actually like her...."