The healer and the broken alpha

Chapter 6 : never letting go

Dax could hear the pack gathering outside in the backyard and saw Alpha Neal and the wolves from the White Thorn Pack talking to some of the pack members. They all looked so at peace and happy with their lives.

Lives I wanted to destroy. He thought to himself

His father was right. Living with the people and living the lives of the ones he wanted to kill was the worst punishment for someone like him.

He saw how the mothers looked at their pups with love and how their mates held them, knowing they were safe and together. He would have destroyed their happiness.

His eyes roamed the crowd outside his window until they settled on a familiar dark brown head of hair.

Diera was standing alone off to the side, wearing a denim shirt and black jeans. Her hair framed her face, a few strands resting on her shoulders. The wind blew her beautiful locks back and her scent was carried through the air, making his insides churn with want for the girl standing outside.

His mother walked out with a few of the pack women following her, carrying bowls and platters of food. They set it down on a long table surrounded by many round tables of ten. His father gestured for everyone to come forward once the food was laid out, and he watched the kids run for their plates.

Alexis and Iris called Diera from across the lawn, and he saw her flinch, caught off guard. Seeing her so vulnerable made him want to hold her, to keep her safe from the world that had made her so scared.

Everyone had gathered around the tables, and he watched her walk to the area reserved for her pack. She placed her plate down beside a boy and began to sit when he saw a boy grab her arm.

His fists clenched. *How dare he touch my mate!* He stormed out of his room and went downstairs. He was about to open the door leading to the backyard when he stopped, his hand on the doorknob.

How would the pack react to him being out there? His father? His mother?

He pulled his hand back and shoved it in his pocket when he heard, "You gonna come outside? You are still a part of the pack and it is a pack dinner."

Damon stood behind him, his expression neutral, avoiding eye contact.

"I don't think they want me out there, little brother," he said, gesturing outside.

"Damon. My name is Damon. I hate it when you call me 'little brother,'" Damon said, scolding him.

"Can you blame me? Mom tried and failed to rhyme your name with mine," he said with a smirk.

Damon's face turned red. The fact that their mother had told them their names were meant to rhyme always bothered him, but it was the easiest way to get him to talk when they were kids.

"Stop being an ass and come outside. Mom has been worried." Damon stepped past him and walked out the door.

He followed behind, keeping his eyes level in front of him. Damon went ahead and sat by Iris while he lingered back. When the pack noticed him, they fell silent, and he could see their eyes going back and forth between his father and himself. His mother got up to greet him but fell back into her seat when Alpha whitetorn stood up. He bowed his head, directing his eyes down to show respect and to hide the embarrassment that would surely come when he was told to leave. But instead, his father's words shocked him.

"Come and join us, son."

He walked around, and since the seat separating her and the boy was left vacant, he sat down.

Dinner ended, and many of the families had returned to their homes. He watched as Diera spoke to some of his pack members, and he knew he couldn't weigh her down by claiming her as his mate. She deserved a mate who could shift, who had a wolf. The night grew upon them, and he saw Diera lingering by the tree line, away from the crowd. He knew this was the best time to get her alone. He crossed the lawn, dodging a few children running around with their friends. Her back was turned to him, and he grabbed her hand, pulling her into the forest.

The tingles from the contact confirmed it was him, so she didn't protest, letting him haul her deeper into the trees. He stopped when he reached the familiar clearing, the pond glistening behind him.

"You need to leave."

He kept his eyes down, unable to look at her. Every cell in his body pulsated with want for her, but she deserved better than me he thought to himself

"If you leave now, your wolf won't feel like she's missing something. And since I don't have a wolf, she won't have anything to reach out to."

He heard her step closer, and he looked up to see her eyes level with his.

"What I've always wanted and hoped for is a mate. I'm not going to run away just because he has his own baggage to deal with. You don't get to decide that for me." She held his gaze and continued, "Just because you made a bad choice, and now you have to deal with the consequences, doesn't make you a bad person. It doesn't make you any less deserving."

He watched her clench her fists and scowl at the ground beneath her feet. "I see the way my pack looks at my brother — they worship him. I see the way they talk to my father. You saw how they looked at me. I c-can't allow you to be the mate of a mistake."

His voice cracked, and he raked his fingers through his hair, turning away, unable to look at her. "I will only hurt you."

It was physically painful, telling her to move on when she was his.

"I've been hurt before. I can deal with it."

He turned to see her standing there, tears in her eyes. The wind blew through the trees, and her hair was blown forward. Her mystifying scent invaded his senses, and before he knew it, he had her pressed against his chest. He felt her small arms wrap around him, and he buried his face in her neck, pulling her closer into his embrace.

"I see the sadness in your stance. I know you have been hurt. But I can only bring you more pain," he whispered against her collarbone.

"You have been the only good thing that has come into my life for a long time. I don't want to let you go."

He pulled back at this, placing his hand on her cheek, tilting her head up.

"We can't tell our packs about us being mates not yet ."

“Anything you say”