You Again

Chapter 5

Once we arrived at the clinic I was beyond winded. It felt like the air was being sucked from my lungs. We both collapsed on the rocking chair out side of the clinic.

Mom’s clinic was the sweetest looking cottage in town. It had a way of making you feel at peace. Mom used natural patterns and colors to connect to the earth.

There had always been a garden that a lot of the clients kept up with. She hung fairy lights a few years back at Aaliyah’s request. When we came the next year there were Mason jars scattered among the fairy lights hang from the roof. In the Mason jars were fairies molded from clay and painted beautifully. Mom later told me Ernest did that. He also made a Mason jar for Aaliyah with a little fairy that looked just like her.

I stood once I caught my breath. Walked over to the wind chimes. I ran my hand past the crystal chimes making them sing. I loved the gentle twinkle the colorful gems made.

I let us in to the clinic and head to the back kitchen. “So what was it you wanted to ask me?”

Ernest watched me closely as I prepared our coffee. His expression was serious as he assessed if I was ready to receive his request. “I want you and Aaliyah to come have dinner with my parents. I know that’s a lot to ask, but I thought that”-

“If we’re staying here you should try to have a relationship with your daughter,” I said finishing his thought.

“Only if that’s what you both want.”

I did not want him to do this if he wasn’t ready. Aaliyah was a lot more cynical and opinionated then we were at her age. She was a strong personality. I knew he could be weak or soft on her if he felt like she’d think he is a monster or something stupid like that.

“You really think you’re ready for that kind of relationship with her?”

“I’ve always wanted a relationship with her.”

“I do remember you begging me to not tell her about you.”

“And you told me a million times that I was stupid. And I agree. That was stupid. I want to be a dad.” His last statement made me wonder.

“Why don’t you and Cheyenne have kids… did you guys ever get married?”

“No and not yet.”

“What are you waiting for?”

“I don’t think she’d want us to talk about that.”

“Too damn bad. You want to be in my kid’s life, she’s gonna be a part of that too. So tell me.”

He studied me again. His expression still cautious. “I just wanted to be sure we won’t trigger eachother. Sometimes we feel like a trauma bond and sometimes we feel like we’re best friends. I’ve never felt like her spouse…”

That was not the answer I was expecting. Now I wanted to find away to never have started this conversation. He looked to be wishing the same. Or at least I thought.

“I also promised myself that if by some miracle I found myself in the position to be with you. I’d take it no matter what.”

God I wanted that. I wanted that more than anything. However Mr. Holland was early. He walked into the room as the air between us became charged. “Mr. Carmier, it’s good to see you again.” Mr. Holland said greeting Ernest.