Chasing Her Light - Resisting My Brother's Bestie

Dirty *POP*

I try to forget about Chase and throw myself into my work, not even stopping to eat. I feel sick and I'm barely able to nibble on anything I had brought.

I read and make lists and look up grammar and format until my eyes are nearly crossed. My fingers are cramped, my glasses are smudged and I've run my fingers through my hair so many times I'm sure it looks completely unkempt. I'm suddenly reminded of Doc from Back to the Future. I burst into nervous giggles, the kind you have when the only other option is to cry.

I sit up slightly in my seat, my fingers clicking on the keyboard, making notes. I reach over into the inbox for another folder and feel only plastic. I look down at it, surprised. I have no more work to do. That's impossible. I've only been working for two or three hours.

I look up at the clock and my vision blurs. To my surprise, it's four. I had started work just past 7:30 this morning. I blink, trying to clear the tiredness from my eyes. I'm sure they're bloodshot by now.

My ears are nearly ringing from hours of music, most of it depressing and vengeful (think Alanis Morissette circa 1995) and all the stuff that I consider to be darker. Neoni, grandson, Imagine Dragons, Story of the Year; really anything with a strong bass, hard guitar riffs and angry lyrics.

I'm that angry teenager again. The one who dyed her hair crazy colors, using cosplay as an excuse. The one who had piercings and tats that her parents never knew about. I'm that girl who couldn't wait to grow up, to be the adult I thought would be able to escape everything I went through, everything I was. I wanted to hide from it forever.

I was free until my past came back to bite me in the ass in the form of Chase Gray.

I rub my temples and sigh. I feel drained and too tired to care about anything.

I turn my music down and absentmindedly begin reorganizing everything. Maybe today wasn't a complete waste. My inbox tray is satisfyingly empty. At least that's one thing that was good about working like a beast.

Just as I finish packing my things, I hear a thud and feel a gust of air. I freeze for a split second and then close my eyes with a sigh as I recognize the scent wafting through the air. I reluctantly pull my head up and force it to turn in the direction of the perpetrator while trying to keep a neutral face.

"Hello Vivian," I say flatly.

*𝘗𝘖𝘗*

Ugh, not the gum thing again. She acts like a middle school mean girl.

I resist the urge to roll my eyes. She's looking at me with this sad puppy dog face with a tinge of snarkiness that's barely noticeable unless you can see past her facade of helplessness.

"What?" she asks innocently, tilting her head slightly. She smacks her gum casually with her arms lightly crossed across her chest. She's so thin she looks nearly serpentine and the gum popping isn't exactly keeping her from looking like a toxic predator.

*𝘗𝘖𝘗*

I grit my teeth to keep from saying anything she would regret. I pop my lips.

"What do you need?"

She pouts at me -

-NOT THE POUTING THING!

I am so done. If she pouts at me one more time, I'm gonna rip her lips off and feed them to the pigeons that are always sitting outside the building.

"Could you pleeeeease proof these for me?" she pouts.

*𝘗𝘖𝘗*

Oh

My

God

I ignore the urge to fulfill my promise.

𝘞𝘩𝘺 𝘸𝘰𝘯'𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘥𝘰 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘰𝘸𝘯 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘬? I inwardly grumble. It's all too much. I suddenly feel deflated, too tired to deal with this s**t; with her s**t.

*𝘗𝘖𝘗*

I can't even get mad.

I give her a tentative smile. "Sure Vivian. When's it due?"

"At 4:30."

*𝘗𝘖𝘗*

I blink several times before I lift my eyes to her with a blank stare.

"4:30 today?!" It's 4:10 and I'm supposed to leave at 4:30.

"Yes."

*𝘗𝘖𝘗*

I groan internally and resist the urge to rub my eyes. I'm too tired to argue. I don't feel like fighting her anymore. At this point, I don't care.

"Of course. I'll have this done before I leave."

*𝘗𝘖𝘗*

"Just make sure it's in Chase's inbox by 4:30. You don't wanna get the blame for anything going wrong, do you?" She smirks at me, her blonde hair perfectly styled into layered waves.

*𝘗𝘖𝘗*

My smile falters a little. I force it back onto my face and nod.

She lets out one more pop before she walks away. No, no. She nearly slithers away. At least in my head she does.

I push my chair back from my desk. Chase?

I thought he was gonna be "Mr. Gray." He's not one to be so casual when he's in a position of power.

I stretch my arms up and yawn. I feel a row of pops up my back, relieving the pressure I had from sitting for so long. I'm actually really surprised that no one bugged me today but I guess everyone saw how much work I had to do and didn't want to disturb me. I'm known as the resident workaholic.

I rub my face with my hands and bend over the manuscript. I let out a tired breath as I assess the few sheets. Yeah 4:30 is doable.

Ten minutes later, I realize that helping Vivian was a mistake in more ways than one. There is no way I would get this done by 4:30. When I had agreed to help, the manuscript hadn't looked that long but the font is tiny. I put my head down on my desk. I'm tired. Just tired.

I pick my head off the desk and hunker down, ready to finish it. Before I know it, it's nearly 6. I only have one paragraph left, thank God.

I quickly look it over and don't see any big mistakes. I can't say that for the rest of it. The first half read like a middle school essay. I'm surprised that we even accepted the project. I paperclip the stack and place it back into the folder before shooting an email to Chase with the edits.

There are only a few people left, most of them packing up their things to leave. I stand and feel the blood rush to my head. I grab onto the edge of my desk and close my eyes until the dizziness passes. I take in a shaky breath and grab the folder, tucking it under my arm. I walk past my coworkers exchanging smiles and waves.

I walk towards Mr.Tatum's office and it's not until I get to the door that I realize I don't know where Chase's office is.

It doesn't matter right now.

I'm 99% sure he's already gone. I sigh in relief. I don't feel like dealing with him, much less seeing him again.

I casually walk past the first few offices, not seeing his name. It's not until I get to the end of the hallway that I finally see the corner office with his name on the door. I'm the tiniest bit jealous of him. It's a beautiful office with floor to ceiling windows all the way around except for a stretch of hallway.

I place the folder into the box drilled into the solid section of wall, just to the side of the door. As I turn to walk away, I hear the doorknob turn. I turn my head back and I can only look at it in horror.

𝘐𝘵'𝘴 𝘱𝘳𝘰𝘣𝘢𝘣𝘭𝘺 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘤𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘯𝘦𝘳𝘴, I try to soothe myself.

But I know deep down that it's not. The door opens and I'm standing face to face with Chase.