Chapter 33: Elinor
424 Words
The fire crackles in the hearth of Castle Mona. My refuge, my home.
I’m snuggled up on a large sofa with sagging cushions, and buried under a mountain of throws. Still, I’m frozen. The cold seeps into my veins, into my bones, into my soul.
But what is happening to me?
Sighing, I get up and walk to a narrow window. Through the window, I see the moon. It is full again. My fingers tighten on the cup of tea I’m holding. I bring it to my face and the white curls rising from it warm the tip of my nose.
But it’s not enough.
In this ancestral setting, this residence which saw the birth of generations of Mona, little has changed. My family has always respected traditions. Our laws. When I returned, my parents welcomed me with open arms, but I could tell in their eyes that they didn’t understand. In the eyes of Liv, my sister, it’s something else entirely. I read boundless admiration in his eyes. An admiration that wasn’t there when I was just a teacher at Wiccard Academy.
The Wiccard… I tried to resume my post, but in vain. Rediscovering this all-too-familiar environment, forcing a smile in response to Lise-Ann’s pettiness, bending my neck before a Levenach who was both contemptuous and evasive… I couldn’t. I quit.
Even staying with Neeve and Sixine in the loft is beyond me. They remind me so much...
Say it. Say it, finally admit it. Free yourself from this weight.
But I shake my head. My phone is ringing. It’s Six. I pick it up and hold it to my ear. But the words don’t come out. My gaze remains riveted on the moon, and I see only him. Even though the Bretton Pack Alpha is on my mind, I refuse to say his name. However, these few letters whispered aloud would fill the emptiness of my heart, I am sure. But I can not. That would be yet another betrayal. I hang up without a word.
Inside an inlaid wooden console to my right, I know my father stores his best bottles. All I had to do was reach out, open the little door, and grab one of them. I could also go up to my room, I used to hide boxes of anxiolytics everywhere. In case.
Temptation makes my heart beat erratically. Will I give in?
In me, the pain is so sharp that I would like to scream. And I wish that howl was that of a wolf.
Cooper.
- Writer
