Ya Amar (My Moon)

Forty

Amir was right. There were love bites on my neck and fingernails scratch running across my back. I shivered. He did all that. He marked me as his. My hair was a mess. The braids were scattered like a bed nest. The feeling I got was unexplainable. It was a mixed feeling. I had never felt so loved and cared for last night. He showed me what it meant to be loved and wanted. I walked into the shower cubicle and took my bath.

After my bath, I said my prayer. I took out a navy blue shirt dress then slipped into it. The shirt glided down to my knees. Amir was in the balcony, walking to and fro. He was on the phone. From where I stood, I could see the tension on his face. Whatever the person on phone was telling him made him tensed.

While I made my face up and tied my tiny braids into a bun, Amir came back into the room. He sat on the chaise longue scrolling through his phone, worry lines on his face. I used perfumed and walked to him.

"What are you doing on your phone?" I took his phone away from him and threw it beside him as I sat in between his legs putting his hands around me. "Is something wrong? You look tensed" I leaned into his chest playing with his hands.

"Nothing is wrong with me" he kissed my neck.

"Your face says otherwise. You are worried. What happened on the phone now?" I pushed my head to the side to give him more access. "I have forgotten you won't tell me" I said remembering last night when we were being chased.

"I love you" he wrapped his hands around me opening a button of the shirt I wore. "You give me so much joy than I could ask for" he traced kisses to my shoulder.

"Sometimes, your words just take me off guard" I said sincerely. "I don't expect some words from you but you just say them and they make my heart fluster" he stopped showering my neck and shoulder with kisses then sighed. His warm breath fanned my skin.

"Santino is back. He has come back" he said, his voice dangerously low.

My heart tumbled with fear as my body grew still. His words sank into me causing unexplainable emotions to go on inside me. My breathing seized. I do not know this Santino but knowing he was back caused fear in me. I sat motionless not able to think or speak. Why does he have to come back? What Amir had told me about him had said so much than I expected. Santino was heartless and had caused lot of problems in my husband's life.

Slowly, I got out of my husband's hold getting up. My legs shook under me but I tried to maintain my balance. Amir had his head bowed. A countenance I had never seen on him framed his face. He sighed setting back into the chair and dropping his legs on the floor.

"He came to see me in my office on your first day at school. I don't know how he knew I am back but what baffled me the most was he knew I am married" he said, his voice low. "I was surprised too and he just laughed reminding me of how cruel he was and left" he stood up and walked to me. "Those men that chased us last night were his men. They were the ones who carry out his dirty jobs for him" he held my shoulders. "Angel, Santino is back into my life and the truth about it is he will not leave until he gets what he wants but I don't know what he wants" he gazed at me, his eyes filled with sincerity I could not deny.

"Then how did he know we are in Prague?" I asked finding the voice I lost unknowingly.

"I don't know" Amir shook his head. "He found us and I don't know how"

"Why didn't you tell me he is back?"

"Because then I did not have the courage to tell you" he held my hand. "I do not know how you feel about him. I did not want to scare you"

"But you are scaring me" I said unable to recognize my voice.

"I am sorry for that and there is one more thing"

"What?" I swallowed ready for a bad news.

"Our honeymoon has to end here"

"What?" I shouted.

"We have to go back to London"

"Why?" I shouted baffled.

"We have to end it here"

"Oh my God! Oh My God! Why? Why?" I shouted getting hold of my head.

The fact that we were going to end our honeymoon made me angry. I felt my head grow hot at his words. This can't be happening. My perfect honeymoon had being ruined! No Umrah! No Thailand!

"You have to understand"

"Understand what?" I barked. "I should understand the fact that my perfect honeymoon has come to an end. For Allah's sake I just wanted to get away with you and this. First we were shot at and now we have to go back to London!" I freaked out.

"We have no choice. You should start packing. We are leaving soon. The private jet will arrive in Prague in an hour and few minutes"

I knew I was red with anger. My blood was pumping hot through my veins. Everything I dreamt of just went down the drain because some stupid Santino De Angelis has come back. What a way to ruin my day and honeymoon. I knew I should be worried that we had some rebel back into our life but I was angry that my getaway has finished. Yesterday, I was having a nice time with my husband never thinking about some people coming after us. Overnight, everything changed.

I slammed the box into the booth of the rented car not waiting for Amir to drop his before closing the booth. I did not care. He should have told me since so that I would prepare my mind but no he refused to and hid things away from me. Amir tried talking to me but I had nothing to say to him. When my honeymoon had begun, I had to go back to London, back to my busy life. What will I tell my friends when they ask me why I am back early?

The flight back to London was an hour and forty five minutes. Amir's private jet had come to pick us. Throughout the flight, I had not said a word to him instead I made up for the sleep I missed the night before. When we were about to land, Amir woke me up and told me to use my seat belt. He was quiet and had a tired and worried look on his face but I did not care.

There were four black cars waiting for us at the airport when we got down. Vincent, my husband's manager and some workers were waiting. I did not know when he arranged it and I do not care. Vincent greeted Amir and I and I only mumbled to his reply.

"Welcome" Vincent said opening the back door for me to enter.

It reminded me of when I first came to London and had ridden to the manor in a convoy of three cars. Then I was awed and full of question but now that I knew the truth behind it, I just hopped into the car sulking. On our drive home, Amir called someone whom he spoke Arabic to. Since I knew nothing, I zoomed out of the conversation.

I stomped upstairs to our room when we got home. When I say home, I meant our new house. I did not care if my attitude was rude because the more I thought about my ruined honeymoon the more I got angry. I snatched my hijab away and threw it on the bed. Fuming like a mother hen, I pulled off my earrings. The room door opened as I threw the earrings on the dressing mirror. Amir walked in closing the door gently behind him.

"Angel" he called taking slow steps towards me.

"I do not have anything to say to you and I do not want to hear anything from you" I said before he could talk further.

"I am sorry but you have to understand"

"Yes, I have to understand that my husband is hiding so much from me and I feel as if I do not understand the man I married and my honeymoon was just cut short" I shouted.

"You are shouting. People are downstairs"

"Do I look like I care? I am angry right now Amir and I do not want to fight you. I just need some space. Solve whatever the problem is. Maybe later, I would have calm down and we would be able to talk better"

"Okay if you say so" he said and walked out.

After he left, I screamed out my anger into the pillow.

Stupid Santino! Foolish Santino! He ruined my honeymoon. How dare he? I yanked a blue jean romper from my wardrobe. When I catch him, I will skin him alive. He would never try such a thing with me. My husband was hiding things from me. I wore the romper. He does not trust me. I angrily buttoned up. What does he take me for? A fool or some naïve woman. He does not want me to be scared and he already scared me. I huffed sitting on the bed. I picked my phone up to call someone that we are back to London. I did not know who to call first whether Mahira, Mi Jin or someone from the manor. I called the last person on my call history, Mahira.

"Hello girl" Mahira beamed into the phone. I sighed easing the tension on my forehead.

"I am back to London" I said without returning her greetings.

"I see, why? I was surprised when you call came in"

"We are back, Mahira. We had to come back quick"

"Why? You were going away for a month"

"Something came up at Amir's office so we had to leave early"

"Ya Allah, this is bad"

"It really is and so annoying" I groaned.

"Sorry babe. Where are you now?"

"At our house"

"So did you see your wardrobe? Mama and I moved your stuffs to your house. Amir asked us to and we added more clothes to your closet" she said.

Because I was angry, I had not even noticed that they had moved our stuffs to our house. I had forgotten we did not move them before we travelled. I got up and walked to the closet. That was when I noticed the change. The rompers I wore was new. It was not in my clothes before.

"Yes I did. Thank you" I said looking at the closet.

My clothes, shoes, bags and others had added in number including Amir's clothes.

"Amir told us to do it. He does not want you to go through any stress when you arrive. We also stocked your kitchen"

"Thanks so much dear. May Allah reward you abundantly?"

"Ameen"

"How is aunt Sabr?"

"She is fine. I will inform her of your arrival"

"Okay then bye" I ended the call not waiting for her reply.

I called the manor and informed them of our arrival. Nani was full of questions and I gave them the same excuse then I called Mi Jin and told her I will be in school the following day.

I did not see my husband for the rest of the afternoon and evening. When I was hungry and knew no one was home except me, I went downstairs to the kitchen where I found bread and jam. Amir did not call. He did not even message me and he left me alone in the big house. My earlier anger was already fading but the fact that he left me alone made me sad.

I washed the plate I used and returned back to the room where I laid on the bed. My phone rang and I picked up the call.

"Hayati" Amir breathes into the phone, his voice sounded very weary.

"What?" I said.

"I had to be at work. I am sorry I did not inform you"

"Okay" I said.

"Noor" he called as I was about to end the call.

"Hm"

"I am so sorry. I am very sorry for the unexpected. I had no choice" I said nothing and ended the call.

He could apologise all I want. His apologises won't change anything.