The Other Roommate

13 - Canvasses And Napkins

Alex and Callie were in a little painting studio on a Sunday morning. It was the younger girl's idea and Alex was not complaining given it was with Callie and she loves creating art. Furthermore, any excuse she could use to spend more time with her roommate, she would gladly take. Alex was going to think of something if that plan did not arise anyway.

They were in an old building with high awning windows and exposed brick walls and beams. If it were dark, it could very well be used in thriller movies, but it seemed as if it was Alex's environment and Callie was oddly calm about it. It may be just the ambience or Alex's hand gripping hers might have done some magic.

"Before I let you guys go crazy with the painting, there are a few pointers that I would like to discuss." The male instructor who couldn't have been more than mid-thirties began, speaking professionally. He stood in front of the little group of people with his canvass to his left and a table with a hodgepodge of painting materials behind him. "The paint that come in tubes are rather thick and stiff. I have thinned the oil paints with a slow-dry medium to a glossy, mayonnaise consistency and they're all in the mason jars on this table."

He had previously introduced himself as Bobby, welcoming his new students to the class. Bobby wore a simple black tank and worn out and paint stained jeans with his old combat boots. His unruly dark hair was of medium length as he sported a scruffy look completed by a five o'clock shadow. Bobby had an old white towel shoved in his back pocket.

Callie was trying to fit the puzzles together, she feels as if she has seen the guy before. She kept a close eye on the teacher's mannerisms and his features as she was drowned in her thoughts. She looked for the time in her life that she had met the guy, if she had met him at all.

"Thinning is a good technique to allow you to add more detail to your painting. It would be easier to spread the paint and to paint layers over it." He explained, running his hand through his hair before he reached back on the clump of eight kinds of paintbrushes. He held each one out explaining their main uses and the most common ones artists use.

Bobby put the small brushes down and picked up a palette with globs of red and white paint by the edge, holding it up. "This is what you call a palette and this is how you hold it." He demonstrated the proper handling of the wooden plate. He then picked up a two inch brush and scraped a little amount of red paint down and started tapping it. "I personally like tapping on the paint to give the brush even volumes so when you start brushing, you won't have clumps of paint in some areas while the other has virtually none."

The instructor did a couple of brush strokes in the middle of the canvass and showed them how to smoothen out the patterns and blending them by gently brushing with a clean brush. "You can use this as a backdrop for the object you're painting or you can paint the exact background you see. It's up to you."

"As far as strokes are concerned, you can just brush in one sweep or make depth through textures with more layers of paint. Either way, I'm fine with that. I don't expect you all to make layers and have particular brush strokes to show motion or stillness in your paintings given that not only is this is a beginner's class, it's not a formal one either." Bobby swiveled to face his class, waving his arms to different directions as he explained. "You all know people come here for recreational purposes. Besides, self-expression is warmly welcomed. Anything you decide on doing with your paintings is valid." He stated, offering his class a grin.

"Shall we?" Bobby extended his arm towards the other side of the room with canvasses and chairs circling a high stool with bunch of bananas perched in the middle.

The bartenders and the rest of the class of 10 walked towards two of the seats with Callie to Alex's right. The older girl had grinned the moment she saw how excited her roommate was at the sight of the bananas. It had amazed Alex how such a simple, quaint object elicited such positive feelings towards Callie. It was her favorite fruit after all.

"Cal," She leaned closer to her with that hushed voice, resting her hand on her roommate' lap. When Callie turned to face her, she continued, "Why did the banana go to the doctor?"

Callie was more than confused at the question and the sudden outburst that came with Alex's broad smile and mischievous looking pair of green eyes. Despite being the constant source of bad jokes, Callie was being outshined by Alex's playful side.

She let out a sigh as her eyes rolled. She begrudgingly queried, "Why, Alex?"

Alex's smile grew wider that her eyes were barely open. Her body had begun to tremble from the initial stages of her forthcoming laughter. Her last resort was to brush her hair back to gain some sort of control - psychologically hyping herself up. "Because it was not peeling well."

The older bartender felt incredibly appalled that the corny joke made her laugh harder than it should have. The feather light feeling in her chest had astounded her and she felt that way because she was letting her child-like playfulness win her usually brooding character.

"Oh god!" Callie groaned despite her crumbling front. She was about to lose it and laugh along with her roommate. "When did you become so cheesy?"

Alex shook her head, tapping Callie's lap repeatedly while shaking her head. "That was a total knee-slapper."

Callie was amused as evidenced by her laughter. Callie had sealed her eyes shut from, praying for a gush of composure to seep through their veins. She did not want to disrupt the class that were busy marveling at their painting materials. She wanted to be disappointed at herself for laughing but the joke was right up her own joke's street. Both roommates had slapped their hands over their mouths to muffle the noise they were creating. They had leaned against each other's shoulders, giggling like little children.

"My turn. My turn." She excitedly tapped Alex's hand on her lap. She gasped for air and took deeper breaths to replenish her oxygen supply.

Callie was doing a good job at composing herself but when Alex looked up with her noticeably red face, she just blurted out laughing again, snorting in the process. The embarrassment of the pig-like sound was enough to snap Callie out of it while it only intensified Alex's laughter.

She pushed Alex upright, deadpanning, "What's the difference between ignorance and apathy?"

Alex simply shook her head at her inability to speak. She was gasping for air as if she was being choked.

Callie narrowed her eyes at her roommate in annoyance begrudgingly muttering, "I don't know and I don't care."

Alex frowned, jutting her bottom lip out as she held her head low. The last part of the statement echoed in her head. Her old fear of having no one to stay by her side no matter how many times she has screwed up or how less her achievements are or the kind of person she is and will become. She was instantly sent to a state of despondency despite knowing it was a lighthearted joke. It had genuinely scared Alex, especially because the statement came from the girl she's falling for.

"Aw, babe. Don't be sad." Callie coaxed, holding Alex behind her neck and pulling her close so that her lips were pressed to her roommate's forehead. "I'm sorry. That was a joke."

She graced Alex's forehead with gentle chaste kisses as her other hand made it to the green-eyed girl's cheek, her thumb running through the smooth surface. Callie felt Alex's cheeks tighten to a smile, or a smirk, she was not sure until she pulled away.

"You called me babe." Alex looked up with the gentlest of smiles.

Day five. Check.

The warmth in Alex's chest had caused her heart to tumble in glee after hearing the single word. It was the very word that positively stunned Callie - making her question why she had not admitted to her feelings for Alex the night Colin came to the bar. Callie had called her the endearment several times. However, that was the first time she had ever said that without playing pretend and Alex was especially delighted by that.

Callie furrowed her brows, feigning indifference, "I know that."

She took Alex by surprise when she pulled her for a brief, breathtaking kiss on the lips.

"Alright. Let's get everybody situated." Bobby instructed, breaking the little moment up. He looked around the circled group, making sure they were all set. "You're painting bananas today as you can see. You can choose to draw an outline with the pencils in your painting materials or just paint right away. Any questions?"

The class shook their heads with individuals muttering a "no" which made Bobby leave center stage to oversee the painting process. He stepped aside but not before running his hand through his hair.

Callie gasped as soon as she reached for the two-inch brush for her background. She gripped the wooden handle tightly, sitting straight as she remembered who Bobby resembled. She gave her roommate a knowing look with a smirk that barely resurfaces.

"You would look like him if you were a guy." Callie wiggled her brows at her baffled roommate.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Alex protested to no avail. Her roommate was ignoring her while drawing an oddly shaped banana.

Bobby gave the group an hour to finish their work. The true beginners of the class had to be satisfied with their ordinary, single and/or messy jumbled strokes while Alex was extremely proud of herself given her painting showed depth and texture. Her stokes had perfectly captured the stillness of the banana while ensuring its vibrancy and life. She even gave the light's reflection on the yellow surface its shine.

Alex wrote "Callie's Morticia" on the bottom right corner of her painting, making her grin in the process. She had just branded herself as Callie's and she felt marvelous. Her roommate saw her writing the little inscription and decided on putting "Alex's Merryweather" on hers.

The little proclamation of ownership made Alex's heart leap. Whatever that meant for the status of relationship excited her to great ends. Callie didn't have to write it but she did and that gave Alex hope and confidence with wherever their "relationship" will lead.

They proudly showed each other their paintings, Callie laughing at her miserable attempt at the art but ceased when she saw how detailed, how animated Alex's painting was. It was as if the bananas in her painting were real and she was just to reach for one of them and eat it.

Thirty minutes later, the bartenders were in a local pizza shop. They had left their paintings at the studio to allow for proper drying and they were looking for a good lunch. They were in a red leather padded booth with a green table - two of the colors of the Italian flag.

Callie scribbled something on the white napkin while they were waiting for their pizza and drinks. She then timidly handed it to Alex who was particularly confused as to what the random dashes and dots meant. She looked at Callie like she was a crazy person, scrutinizing her with that intense stare. The younger girl was nervously tapping her fingers on the surface.

"What is this?" Alex incredulously waved the napkin slightly with her elbow set on the table. She raised a brow up, pursing her lips.

"Alex, what do you call an apology with dots and dashes?" Callie bashfully retorted with a sigh, hoping that expelling air would release her from anxiety.

"This again?" The older bartender complained, slumping back down in her seat. She slouched, holding the napkin with both hands, observing it. "Cal, it was a one-time th-"

Alex was mostly annoyed that she did not know the answer to the corny joke.

"A remorse code." Callie reluctantly interjected, clenching her fists with her eyes shut. "I'm really sorry about yesterday, Alex."

Shunning Alex away had been constantly bothering her despite them patching everything up and the older girl not showing any sort of resentment. Her mind may have been distracted by Sydney Tucker but it was inundated by thoughts of Alex - how she makes her feel, her kisses, her touch, even just the way she looks at her and that sultry raspy voice of hers. She would constantly feel weak in the knees, her stomach in turmoil, her lungs desperate to expand while her heart - her heart would have did a somersault or a double back flip if it were physically possible.

Seeing Alex so disappointed, so hurt was crippling her. Her stomach was particularly sour that she almost felt as if she was intentionally ingesting acid in her system. She was physically in pain and as far as her cardiovascular area is concerned, it felt as if it was crumpled first then pulled out and stomped mercilessly. What exacerbated the situation was, she knew she caused it.

Alex straightened up, surprised. She brought her brows up high, widening her eyes. "You must really be sorry. You used my real name." She nodded before breathlessly muttering a, "Wow."

The green-eyed girl smirked knowingly that didn't elicit any other reaction from Callie other than the diarrhea looking face she's been sporting which caused Alex's heart to sink. She reached for the younger girl's fists and unclasped them. She slipped her hands in Callie's - cradling her roommate's fingers in her palms.

"Cal, I told you, I forgive you. It's not even a big deal. You were worried about hurting her feelings and that's fine." Alex reassured her, running her thumbs through Callie's knuckles. "It's okay. It's not like you kissed her or anything." She jested, hoping to make the air lighter. She forced a smile, twisting her head slightly.

"I just...I'm really sorry." Callie shook her head and reluctantly looked up to meet Alex's tender gaze. "I'm sorry, Alex."

Alex let out a sigh in defeat, desperately hoping to soothe Callie with her next attempt at comforting her. "It's-"

"Your order, ma'am." Tina, the female server who may have been in her late teens, interrupted holding a wooden platter with their Margherita pizza.

The first word out of the server's mouth or the slightest whiff of the pizza's aroma perked Callie up, with the broadest grin grazing her lips. She unintentionally retracted her hands from her Alex who shook her head, smiling in amusement.

Alex thanked the server before Callie's antics nabbed her full attention. "Had I known pizza was the key to that smile, I would have yelled at Tina to hurry the f**k up."

She chuckled as she watched Callie struggle to pick up a slice, hissing in pain at how hot the food is. Alex observed her roommate's next move, hoping Callie would not put the pizza in her mouth just yet. It was still piping hot and the younger girl's hands were trembling from the heat while her eyes were bulging out of their sockets and her drool would have dripped from her mouth.

Callie did shove the pointy end of the pizza and took a bite of it, or at least tried to.

"It's hot." She slurred while her tongue stuck out and scrunched up face, crinkling the bridge of her nose - her words incomprehensible. She fanned her mouth with her hand and breathed through her mouth to alleviate the pain.

Alex laughed a little too much that her stomach was starting to feel painful with her arms clutching onto her belly. Tears had begun to pool in her eyes as the constant jerking force on her shoulders worsened. Callie's look simply fed her amusement. She was barely able to say anything without pausing as her giggle fest would ensue.

"Hey Cal, while we're at it, why did the hipster burn her tongue with her pizza?" She leaned in closer with a knowing look making Callie scowl at her. Alex was practically panting from laughing so much. "She ate it before it was cool."

As Alex continued her string of laughter, Callie was not finding the corny joke or her pain funny, or Alex's laughing at her.

"Watch it!" She threatened as she put the pizza down to her plate. Her little display of dominance looked like a kitten trying to roar like a lion to Alex. "I just apologized, Rivera."

"Okay. Okay." Alex begrudgingly muttered, raising her hands up in defeat. "I'm sorry, BB."

The mere mention of the acronym of her nickname sent a plethora of emotions to Callie. She had badly wanted to figure the two letters out and had not come close to the words they stand for. However, the acronym also is a signal that Alex was trying to lighten the situation, which Callie accepted easily.

"One of these days I will figure that nickname out." Callie spoke, exasperated. However, she looked down on her plate and saw the mouthwatering beauty that was waiting to be devoured. "But I'm hungrier so let's leave it at that."

"I'm going to tell you one day." Alex teasingly proclaimed, reaching for a pizza for herself.

The younger girl looked up inquisitively at her roommate, momentarily leaving her pizza slice untouched. "I thought the joke was a one-time thing."

Alex simply chuckled, enjoying Callie's youthful curiosity.

"I'm open to change, honey."

The two roommates enjoyed their pizza with occasional casual chatter, talking about work and sometimes Denise and their living arrangements. They had discussed about how they both met Jazmin and Rachel, sharing little funny stories here and there.

Alex hated casual conversations but the one she had with Callie was riveting to her.

Back at their apartment, Denise was still in deep slumber. Neither one bothered to wake their other roommate up considering her angered ape nature when she is suddenly snatched away from the clutches of slumber. Neither wanted to be nagged, punched, kicked or all of the above.

While the youngest of the three savored her sleep time, the bartenders barely had enough sleep. They were only able to comfortably zone out and rest their tired bodies for three hours at most. It was quickly taking a toll on Callie especially with a full belly.

Alex, on the other hand, retrieved her hardbound notebook and sat on her usual spot at the dining table. She had already made coffee and was waiting for the machine to finish brewing. Callie, across her, looked miserable. Her hands covered the entirety of her face while her elbows were perched on the table. Her thumbs were massaging her temples as she coped with the throbbing headache she was feeling. She was groaning quite a lot.

"Cal, are you okay?" Alex worriedly asked, setting her open notebook aside to a sketch of a familiar rooftop.

"Can we stop the talking for a little bit?" Callie indignantly retorted. The strain in her sleepy voice was evident despite being muffled by her hands. "My head is about to explode. I need a big ass bowl of coffee."

Alex pushed her seat back, thankful for the carpet underneath. Otherwise, there would be a particularly irritating scratching that Callie would hate. She had cringed at the thought of seeing an angered version of her roommate with red veins bulging over her already reddened and tired, half open eyes.

Alex came back bearing a green stoneware soup bowl with handles that had "soup" written in bold with what seemed like entire content of the coffee pot inside, and a smaller ceramic cup in her other hand. She merrily perched the soup bowl in front of her roommate and sat with the white ceramic cup in her hands.

The sound of the gentle collision between the bowl and the wooden table prompted Callie to drop her hands. She had immediately groaned. It was either from the bowl in front of her or the pain in her head.

"Smart ass." She complained, dropping her head backwards. "Whatever happened to figuratively spoken words or metaphors?"

"You did say big ass bowl." Alex lifted the cup to her lips, shrugging her shoulders. She smirked knowingly given her mischievous display. "What Callie wants - Callie gets, darling."

Alex took a sip of her drink before reaching for her notebook and putting it back in front of her. She lifted her black sketching pencil with her brows furrowed in concentration. Her left hand was set on the top left corner of her notebook to offer herself more control and to keep it from moving.

Callie silently observed her roommate while trying to enjoy her coffee which was still in the soup bowl. She watched Alex begin to draw the banana they had painted from memory. She had known Alex was a great illustrator given the first two works of art she had seen that were made by her roommate. It had fascinated her that the loud and foul-mouthed Alex Rivera found her little paradise with a movement of the wrist.

The notebook had a sealed envelope attached to the inner back cover which got Callie wondering what could be so personal that the contents needed to be shielded from plain view.

"How come you didn't tell me you draw? And paint?" She unsurely queried, unable to contain her curiosity.

Alex looked up with a confused look across her features. She twirled the pencil between her thumb and index finger. "You see me doing it literally everyday. I didn't think words were necessary."

Callie shook her head incessantly. She was never one to snoop on other's personal business. She had thought that the notebook was merely a journal and that in its essence is private.

"I didn't see. I thought you just write."

"In that case, your eyes were necessary." Alex quipped, smiling to herself. She had forgotten how grumpy her roommate was without the coffee.

"Very funny, Morticia." Callie let out a sigh in frustration, rolling her eyes. "What do you do besides sketch?" She begrudgingly asked.

Alex could still rile her up so easily, just like the first day - only this time, her roommate was able to make her smile with the most ease.

Alex shrugged her shoulders like it wasn't a big deal. "I write stuff." She retorted vaguely given the vast array of the things she jots down.

"Like what?"

"Like 'Callie Maxwell accidentally kissed me today.'" Alex hesitantly retorted. She held her head low in embarrassment and let go of the pencil. She played the blush off by looking indifferent as she peeled page by page in search for something.

Callie, having known Alex for a couple of months, was almost sure her roommate was joking. She incredulously observed Alex's minute movements but was unsuccessful in seeing her entire face, the green-eyed girl's head being bowed down to the notebook in front of her.

"I'm not kidding." Alex insecurely muttered as soon as she stopped skimming the pages of her notebook. She reluctantly looked up and pushed her hardbound book close to her roommate.

Callie looked down and saw the familiar cursive scribbles of Alex's handwriting which indeed said the exact sentence, word for word. It didn't have a date on it but it did have a smiley face right next to the period. She traced the inscription with the tip of her finger lovingly, feeling the mild groves that Alex's lightly pressed handwriting created.

She was amazed at the discovery that her eyes widened coupled by her gaped mouth. Never mind the drowsiness, she was awake like she had a good night's sleep. Callie may have just discovered how much she meant to Alex that the older girl had to write about her in their turbulent times, and it was euphoria.

"Can you tell me about your banana painting?" Callie probed given that they were still in the subject of art, she might as well ask and fill her curiosity up with deliciously succulent knowledge. "Your brush strokes were nowhere near novice."

"I think brush strokes aren't generic in the sense that they aren't always the same from a painter to another." Alex began monotonously with an aimless looking down at the surface of the wooden table.

Her embarrassment had dissipated and the gentleness in her features were long gone given the question. She was always uncomfortable when it came to vocalizing her feelings or her fears. She looked thoughtful yet the distress in the way her brows were held low, the tightness in her jaw were evident.

She swallowed hard amid the sickening knot at the pit of her stomach. "I think it represents the person they are or the feelings that are most ostensible in them. Lines and curves tell a story. It conveys something and if people don't pay attention, or if they focus on its artistry, they could miss it."

Callie was determined not to miss anything ever again. She was to find meaning in Alex's minute actions and make sense of everything - of her peculiarities, her anger or even her bliss. Alex had easily become one of the most important things in Callie's life. By the disgusting feeling she felt when she ignored the older girl, she knew Alex was worth so much more to her than anyone ever did.

And right at that moment, Callie could sense Alex's discomfort. She wanted her roommate to feel like she was there and it wasn't just words, she wanted to show her with her actions. It was as if an invisible hand had pushed her to get up and sit on the chair which was directly to Alex's right. She pushed the seat closer and adjusted it so that her entire body was facing her roommate.

"What do yours say?" Callie cautiously asked, reluctant to meet Alex's gaze. She set her hand on top of her roommate's lap. Alex looked up at her and gave her a half-hearted smile which Callie reciprocated with a gentle reassuring one.

"Mine is of conflicting strokes that overlap in many points. It represents the chaos I have seen and felt in the world. The judgment and disdain in people's eyes when they realize I'm a gay high school drop-out who works at a bar is just staggering. They're always asking if I even have dreams or ambitions at all or if I could reach those without a stupid diploma. It was just too much." Alex whispered the last sentence, fearing that she would choke on herself. Her eyes were covered in a layer of moisture and her tough façade was crumbling down.

She felt free as soon as she finished speaking that her chest felt as if the ginormous mammoth that dwelt in it had somehow trotted its way out. She was used to taking care of other people that even she had forgotten herself. Nobody really asked how she's feeling until Callie came. The younger girl's soothing strokes let her know that somehow, someone is still there for her.

Callie instinctively held Alex on either side of her neck with her thumbs stroking her cheeks. She pulled her roommate close to her as she leaned in to plant soft kisses on Alex's closed eyes that immediately spilled tears.

Alex had never cried in front of anyone. She would always pretend to be angry or anger herself with anything and everything just to avoid tears or weakness. Alex cried in front of Callie and it was a humbling experience for her.

"I want you to know that even when your eyes are closed, even when you can't see anything, I will always be here for you and that I care about you, a lot. I will never judge you just because you don't hold a prestigious degree or the gender of the person you love." Callie affectionately proclaimed with her low voice, looking at Alex's weary green eyes with a smile on her face. "And like I said, you're more than enough. You can dream of anything you want and they will always be rational, valid and reachable. I will be the first person to rub that in the faces of the people who ridiculed you or ever doubted you."

Alex's layers were slowly peeling - revealing an insecurity that is completely hidden to most people. She had been fighting her inner battles by herself and without the help of anybody else which could be by choice or by default. She was brave but the bravest people have their own fears. She was strong but the strongest people sometimes fall apart.

Right at that moment, despite her not being the usual source of strength, Callie was strong because Alex needed her to be.