Intersex

Chapter 12.

My body fell onto the bed like a rag doll. I pulled a large pillow up to my chest and nuzzled it, held it tightly as I Jayden laid down next to me. His warm, bare chest met my bare back and I shivered in comfort. His skin was so smooth, so soft and comfy. His arm stretched over mine under the covers, gently draping over my own arm as he tangled our fingers into a soothing hold.

"You're so cold..." he chuckled as his warm feet met mine. The only cold part about Jayden was the tip of his nose which felt almost frozen as he nuzzled the back of my neck.

"No, I'm not..." I growled at him. "You're just warm..." Well, I was pretty cold but I wasn't in the mood for Jayden tell me that.

"Your room's quite cosy..." he murmured. "Not sure why your bed is so big though..." He snickered. It was true that I had a big bed, it was my parents' old bed. They had given it to me when I moved out since they had bought a new one anyway.

"Shut up, Jayden..." I groaned as I tried to fall asleep.

He pulled me closer to his chest and comfortably wrapped his arm around my waist, hesitantly letting his hand hover over my stomach. I could tell how desperately he wanted to touch it, his hand was twitching with the desire to rub my belly. It was strange to me, my stomach was still flat as a board and it probably would be for quite some time. I could even see a difference.

I felt myself dozing off as Jayden places his warm hand on my bare skin. His other hand was in my hair, gently rubbing my scalp and twisting my hair around his fingers. His touch felt like it had when he first played with my hair back when I fell asleep in Mrs Taraha's classroom. He swirled his fingers over my stomach, drawing small circles over the skin with his index finger.

"Thank you for letting me be here..." He whispered.

"Only till I fall asleep..." I murmured. Honestly, having him play with my hair and rubbing my belly was the most comfortable thing ever. It was so comforting and cuddle that I didn't even remember the times when I had struggled to fall asleep in the past.

"Okay... I'll leave before you wake up..." he chuckled.

⚥ ⚥ ⚥

I woke up feeling even sleepier than I had been when I went to bed. It was close to 8 pm and I was alone in my bed. I didn't want to get up. Voices were coming from the kitchen, more than one. Brian was home but there was someone else. I sleepily got up, rubbing my eyes and groaning as I stretched out my body. My stomach growled.

"Brian!" I called as I yawned, grabbing a sweater off the floor and lazily pulling over my head. The apartment was far too cold for my liking and I shivered as I staggered out to the kitchen. It smelt like ramen. "Brian..." I mumbled, repeating myself since I hadn't gotten an answer.

"Hey, kid!" He called. He turned to me, flashing his flushed face. Jayden turned as he heard me coming into the kitchen and gave me a nod, beer in hand.

"You're drinking..?" I groaned.

"And eating ramen, yes." Brian smiled goofily. "Want some?"

"Yes please..." I mumbled.

Jayden has a strange look on his face. Both of them were obviously tipsy but that wasn't the reason why he was staring at me. His grey eyes pierced my tough facade so easily that I nearly broke down in tears. It was unfair how pretty he was.

"I thought you said you'd leave when I fell asleep..." I muttered.

"I was going to, then your roommate came home and offered me a drink..."

"So?"

"So technically... he invited me to stay..."

"Jayden..." I groaned. My eyes felt like bags of sand in my sockets; heavy and dry. My eyelids begged me to let them fall back over my eyes and crawl back in bed but my stomach said otherwise as it growled at the scents around me. I looked up to see Jayden smirking at me, his eyes were full of lust. "What?" I hissed.

"You just look so cute right now..." He mumbled.

My face heated up and he smirked at me again. "You're drunk..." I snarled in annoyance.

"Which means I'm all the more honest..." he said in a low, husky voice. My face got even hotter and I was sure that he could tell how much I was blushing.

"Shut up..." I murmured.

"Calm down, Micah..." Brian chuckled behind me. I had forgotten that he was in the room and as soon as he spoke I whipped my head around, shooting him a glare. "Someone's hormonal..." He muttered under his breath.

"What'd you say?! I'll kick your ass!" I yelled and pushed my chair back. My legs tangled in the chair's legs as I stormed toward him and I yelped as I felt my body stooping forward. I instinctively did my best to flip my body to the side as I fell, landing harshly on my hip with a loud thud. "f*****g chair f**k!" I yelled and kicked the chair over where I sat on the floor rubbing my sore side.

Before I knew it, Jayden was by my side, holding a hand on my stomach with a frantic look on his face. His breath hitched in his throat and his face was drained of colour.

"Are you hurt?!" He yelped. "Is the baby okay?!" Jayden wrapped an arm around me and pulled me off the floor much to my displeasure. I would've much rather regained some strength before standing up which I could've done perfectly fine by myself.

"Let go!" I snapped and smacked his hands off of me. "D-Don't touch me..." my eyes watered yet again and I rubbed them in frustration. Why did I have to cry every single time something even remotely unfortunate happened? I rubbed my hip in annoyance and shot the chair on the floor a glare. "Oh my f*****g god I hate everything!" I yelled and kicked the chair again. I was usually so cool-headed and calm despite my bad temper so the sudden mood swings were very, very annoying. My foot ached. "You better be f*****g adorable and charming as f**k you goddamn shrimp!" I yelled at my stomach, causing both Jayden and Brian to glance at me with worried expressions.

"Okay..." Brian said as he poured the ramen into a bowl. "How about you have some food and snuggle up on the couch..?"

"Don't tell me what to do!" I squealed as I took the bowl from him and marched out into the living room. After putting the bowl down and sitting down on the couch I teared up again, further adding to the rollercoaster of emotions.

I rushed back into the kitchen and threw myself into Brian's arms, hugging his waist tightly as I sniffled.

"I'm sorry that I'm so annoying!" I squealed. A vibrating laughing erupted from Brian's chest and he wrapped his arms around my neck.

"It's fine, Mickey..." He cooed. "Go eat your dinner..."

My cries calmed as I took in Brian's familiar scent. A part of me settled down in the comfort of Brian's arms. He was the best 'pretend older brother' anyone could have. Not a jock, not a nerd, not a shut-in. Brian was hipster-geeky and well-liked by pretty much everyone. Sure, secretly he was a bit nerdy but it wasn't something that dominated his personality to the point where it made him boring or uninteresting. He was nerdy in a retro way. Nerdy in a cool way. Geeky in a way that made him feel comfortable to be around.

The blanket I wrapped around my shoulder quickly warmed up and I let my body disappear into it as I slurped my noodles. The more I ate, the sleepier I got and if keeping my eyes open was difficult before, it was nearly impossible now. I drank the last soup in the bowl and chewed the last noodle before pushing the bowl away from me on the table in front of the couch. I'd been surreally sleepy for the past few days and while I did enjoy actually sleeping for once, I also found it annoying how much rest my body required. For someone who's only a few weeks into their pregnancy, I sure was feeling drained. I wasn't even showing yet and on top of that, the foetus was still the itsy bitsy tiny. To think such a small life could cause these many changes in my body would never not be frustrating.

⚥ ⚥ ⚥

I spent the remainder of the week studying to the best of my ability and working extra shifts on the weekends. I knew full well that my body couldn't take it but if I was having a baby then I needed the money, every last cent.

"Micah..?" Brian stuttered as I pulled my jacket over my arms. It was only 7 am and if I was lucky they'd let me go before 9 pm. The work hours were inhumane but the payment was great and as long as I had time to eat, I could go on.

"Yeah?" I slurred and turned to Brian. His eyes were wide and a worried frown covered his face. His glasses had slipped down onto the bridge of his nose but he didn't seem to care.

"I really don't think you should head in today..."

"Brian... I need the... money..." I sleepily griped.

"Micah, you need rest... you're pregnant, you shouldn't push yourself..." Brian grabbed onto my arm as I stumbled to the side. "It's not good for the baby..."

"I'm fine..." I insisted. My mouth formed a melancholy smile and I looked up at Brian.

"You're exhausted, Mickey..." Brian said, tugging me into a hug. "You should get some rest..."

"Resting is all I do..."

"That's because it's exactly what you need... I don't think you realise how much more energy your body is consuming right now... Your body is producing more blood to carry nutrients for your baby and your blood pressure is low... Seriously, Micah... I know you want to make sure you have enough money to care for your kid but right now you're literally harming it by being so active..."

"Stop being a smart-ass..." I whimper. Suddenly my legs started feeling shaky and my arms fell to my sides.

"There you go..." Brian cooed. "I'll call your boss..." My body was lifted off the floor and I felt my head resting against Brian's shoulder.

"Stop... I need to go to work..." I argued but as I voiced my opinion, my body didn't agree with me as it fell limp in Brian's arms. I always wondered where he hid all those muscles on that scrawny body of his. He was a lot stronger than he looked but so was I. The eye can deceive you.

Brian gently placed my body on my bed. "I work today so I'll make you some lunch you can heat up, okay?" He said as he tucked me in.

He stopped by the door as he was about to leave and turned his face to me.

"By the way..." he began. "When are you going to tell your parents..?"

My parents... I hadn't seen them in a few months now. "I don't know..." I mumbled. "Soon, hopefully..."

My parents had been high school sweethearts. They got married after college and after several miscarriages and a stillbirth they found out that my mom had a very slim chance of being able to have children, they were heartbroken. One day in late December though, my mother woke up to unpleasant nausea. She was 42 at the time and they had given up on having children nearly two decades ago. The doctors told her that she ran the risk of having a mentally disabled child but my parents didn't care. I was their miracle and I was born perfectly healthy.

"I should visit them more often..." I mumbled to myself as I snuggled into the blankets. They'd be good grandparents. At least my child could enjoy having some, unlike me. They were old now and it was starting to become apparent. Hopefully, they still had enough time left to see their grandchild grow up.

My hand wandered over my flat stomach. The resentment I had felt only a few days ago was completely gone. I had only known of my pregnancy for a few days but I was becoming attached to the idea of having a child. Before all of this started, I could never imagine ever even wanting children. But now things were different. I could see myself cradling an infant. I could see myself holding the hand of a toddler, helping a child with their homework and comforting a heartbroken teen.

My eyesight blurred as I stared at the ceiling. It was impossible to resist the temptation to sleep. My body felt heavy.