Stolen Innocence

Chapter Fourteen

Two weeks had past now, and it had really taken a toll on my mental state. I felt like I was just starting to get my freedom back, and now I felt like I was trapped at home all over again. The doctor explained to me all the options Pregnant women have, there’s adoption, temporary foster care, and the termination, which was also know as an abortion.

The word abortion/termination; for some reason, it sounded horrible I thought. I know I hadn’t planned on any of this to happen, but ‘terminating’ sounded like I was committing murder. It sounded wrong, and it felt wrong for me personally, although I understand why other women would think it was right-Everyone’s situation was different. I had spent the week searching the internet for so many different things, abortions, terminations, foster, adoption. Every one of them made me feel horrible, none of them felt right.

Ella had been checking on me daily, to make sure me and the baby were okay. She said she would be there for me no matter what I chose to do. But she made it clear that if I kept the baby she was to be called Aunty Ella. Which we both agreed was super cute. I loved the fact I also had Ella to talk to about everything. Ella was truly the best friend I could ever ask for.

Ricky and I had still been messaging each other, I missed seeing him. But I thought it was a good idea to keep my distance, and keep things simple between us. Until I had made my mind up. He kept asking me to come out for a movie or dinner, but I didn’t know how to explain that I was pregnant. It just made things harder, besides, who would want to date a girl who was pregnant with her rapists child. Just thinking about it, made it sounded horrible!

My parents had been open about everything, if I wanted the baby, if I chose to put the baby up for adoption, or terminate. They were both fully supportive with what ever I decided. They never pressured me into anything. We kept trying to continue our lives as normal. They worked, I studied, and Dad even helped one of his friends move. We often talked about random things to do with babies, the crying, the diaper changing, the lack of sleep, the struggles, the giggles, the laughs, the cuteness. I like hearing about it all.

Laying there in bed one day while my parents were at work, I was holding the ultrasound picture. Ever since I first looked at, I found myself looking at the photo a few times a day. I don’t know how long I was staring at it for, but I kept smiling. Looking at that photo made me feel happy. I think I finally knew what I wanted to do. I wanted to keep the baby.

I knew there was a lot involved with keeping the baby. The first thing was, making sure Colin was never going to find out about the baby. I going to try my hardest to hide it as much as possible, even if I had to be at home everyday. My mind was made up, I was going to be a Mum- I was going to try and be the best Mum I could be. Now I just had to tell Ella, Ricky, and my parents that there was going to be a baby.

I got lost googling things, researching about it, made me feel excited. I had a lot to learn, and what about baby names, and baby things I needed. Reading about labor sounded a little scary, I don’t like feeling pain in general. There was so much to learn, and heaps I didn’t even understand. I was excited, and happy to tell my parents this afternoon; They were going to be great grandparents.

Ding Dong the door bell rang, so I got up and made my way to the door.

“Who is it?” I asked, with my hand on the door knob,

“Hey Em. It’s me, Ricky. I just thought I would come visit you to see how your doing” Ricky called through the door,

Hearing his voice made me smile, but I felt nervous, because I needed to tell him I was pregnant, and I was going to keep the baby. I took a deep breath and opened the door.

“Hey Ricky, I’m okay now” I said with a smile, and to my surprise he was standing there holding a bunch of beautiful red roses. They were stunning, the aroma they were producing I could smell from where I was standing, they smelt amazing.

“These are for you.” He said with the biggest smile on his face,

“Aw, thank you so much Ricky! They are beautiful!” I said, as my face lit up with happiness, I had the biggest grin on my face, “Come on in, I’ve been wanting to see you, so we can have a talk” I said smiling, even though I was extremely nervous.

He walked through the door and I asked him,

“Oh, how did you know I was even home?” I chuckled, not that I ever went out,

“Pete told me you were home” He grinned cheekily,

“Pete? As in my father Pete?” I asked him confused,

“Yeah your Dad” He laughed,

“Uh huh. Right. So you are him are friends now?” I questioned him doubtfully,

“Actually we are.” He it confidently,

I sat there speechless. They were friends?

“While you were in hospital, after he yelled at me, I ended up having a good talk to him. I told him the truth. All about my parents, and about Colin not being my brother, I told him everything. Your Dad is a really nice guy by the way. Anyways, we ended up exchanging numbers, and I’ve been messaging him daily. Checking up on you” Ricky explained,

I found myself staring at him, I was a little shocked,

“Right, so you guys are best friends now?” I chuckled.

“Yep, Pete is my new best buddy” Ricky smiled and nodded his head.

We sat down on the lounge next to each other, and I was just looking at him in disbelief. I still couldn’t believe that my Dad had made an effort to get to know Ricky. I thought it was sweet that they were getting along good. Their ‘bromance’ was building, how cute.

“So, how are you feeling? Honestly.” He asked concerned,

“Well, I’m getting there. Slowly.” I said with a smile and a sigh. I suddenly remembered I was pregnant, and I needed to tell him. He deserves to know the truth.

“Do you know what’s going on, with me?” I asked him awkwardly,

He looked at me straight in the eyes,

“I know Em. I googled Gestational Diabetes when I got from the hospital, because I was freaking out about you. But don’t worry. I haven’t said anything, or told anyone. I wouldn’t do that to you. I would never tell Alice, Tom or Colin. Colin doesn’t need to know, he doesn’t deserve a baby, he didn’t even deserve you” He was rambling nervously,

“It’s okay Ricky, I believe you. I know you wouldn’t tell them.” I smiled

“I moved out” He sounded so excited as he blurted it out,

I looked at him shocked,

“What do you mean? You moved out of your house? Your Dad’s home?”

I asked him confused.

He nodded,

“What, Why?” I questioned,

“Because I couldn’t stand living under the same roof as him. After what he done to you. Every time I looked at him Emily, I wanted to hurt him, over and over again. I hate him so much” I could hear the anger in his voice as he spoke about Colin, and his hands were shaking slightly too,

“It’s okay Ricky, I never expected you to get involved with any of my drama, and I never wanted you to get in trouble” I told him gently,

He looked up at me and gave me a smile,

“I know you never expected it Em, but I like you a lot and he hurt you, so I want to hurt him” He explained, and I understood what he meant,

I founded myself blurting out,

“I’ve decided to keep the baby Ricky” I was so nervous after I said it, I couldn’t even look at him,

“That’s great Emily!” Ricky yelled excitedly, and it made me jump slightly, I didn’t expect that reaction.

“Really?” I asked him nervously

“I mean, its totally your choice Em, after all, its your life, your body. But I’m glad your keeping it” Ricky genuinely meant it.

I felt overwhelmed, and the tears were starting to fall from my eyes,

“It’s been a hard decision, but I feel like it’s the right one. After all, its not the baby’s fault, he or she didn’t have a choice about any of it. The thought of an abortion makes me feel sick. Regardless, it won’t fix what’s happened to me, or what Colin did. Why should an innocent child suffer because of him! I’ll move away if I have it Ricky, I will leave this whole damn town behind and I’ll give this baby the best life I can. I will struggle, I will make mistakes, but my baby’s life will be filled with love.” I cried as I said it all, but that was exactly how I felt, and I meant ever single word.

Ricky grabbed me, and pulled me in for a hug, he squeezed me tightly. I cried onto his shoulder, and I didn’t even care that it was embarrassing.

“Emily, this is why I like you; a lot. Because you’re strong, determined, your beautiful. But, the best part is; your going to make an amazing Mum” He spoke softly into my ear, and I cried even more as he said it.

“Thank you” I sobbed,

Our embrace last a few minutes. I enjoyed every second of it, I felt like I belonged in his arms. Once we finally released from each others grip, we sat there talking for ages. Ricky told me had moved a few streets away from my place, apparently my Dad had even helped him move. It clicked it my head, I remembered my Dad telling me he was helping a friend move, it all made sense now.

We talked, we laughed, it was amazing. Being near him made me happy. I found myself wishing I had dated him instead of Colin. Ricky is an amazing person, and I really liked him. I wanted him in my life more and more. But i don’t know if he would date someone who’s pregnant to another man. Ricky left about an hour later, and I sat there preparing to tell my parents I was keeping the baby when they got home. Ricky gave me his new address, and told me I was welcome any time.