Detective in the mist

One

“The year is 2067, technology will reach its peak. Global warming has already gotten out of control, the Condi-”.

These words wake me up. I must have left the television on last night.  I chose to set my alarm at 5 in the morning so that I could start jogging early but who am I kidding! Me and my demons know very well I’m not up to it. 

I turn on the lights to check the time on the wall, I do that because my grandmother used to, no other particular reason. Its 6:28. I get out of my bed to brush my teeth; I look in the bathroom mirror to see if my acne got worse. It turns out it hasn’t. in the midst of brushing my teeth; I remember the dream I had last night. I can’t quite get a grasp of the whole scene but I recall seeing myself. I run back to my bedroom and grab my phone to google the crumbs of information I retrieved from the dream before it disappears, to at least make sense out of it.

The top search result said “If you see yourself in a dream, it could mean you have concerns about how you're behaving. It might be time to think about how you're acting and make changes to your behavior if necessary.”    

Huh Strange! Although I wasn’t going to lie to myself, I do need some re adjustments in my life and it starts by cleaning my room, ugh! the filth.

My thoughts drift to the time I was happy and organized, I wasn’t always like this.  an extrovert who got accepted to her dream college, who was in a relationship she thought was going to last until marriage, amazing group of friends. I had it all.

The day after tomorrow marks the 3rd year since my sister was killed. I can still see the horror in my mother’s eyes, the helplessness in my father’s. The heart breaks along with the agony it brought to our family. Not to mention the injustice. It was truly unbearable. I sit on the edge of my bed processing the question that hits me every day and that is “what would have happened if I just let her use my car that night?”