Broken Souls

Chapter 15 - Bailey

After Logan dropped me off, I went straight to my room to avoid Leila. I didn't have the energy to answer any questions she might have. I took a shower and blow-dried my hair. Following Logan's instructions, I packed a bag, unsure of how long he expected me to stay. I packed enough clothes till Friday since I needed to return to work; I really do need the money.

I laid on my bed, contemplating how chaotic everything feels. When will life give me a f*****g break? I desperately need some normalcy. Eventually, I fell asleep. I was awakened by a knock on the door, unsure how long I had slept. Groggy, I stood up and opened the door. Logan walked in and hugged me tightly. "Hey, is everything okay?". He didn't say anything, just lifted me up. I wrapped my legs around his waist, and he buried his face in the crook of my neck.

Something told me he needed this, so I tightened my hold around his neck, squeezing him tightly. We stood there for a few minutes before he spoke for the first time since he arrived, “You all packed?” I pointed to my bag on the edge of the bed. He walked over, and slung it over his shoulder, still holding me as if I weighed nothing. As we left, he locked the door behind us. “You know I can walk, right? You can put me down.” He stopped and looked at me, and for a moment, I thought he was going to put me down. “I know you can walk, but I prefer you right where you are.” I shook my head at him. “Where are we going?”

"We're going to the house. Why do you ask?" he said firmly with a serious expression. "You know my room is right there, and I-I don't want to intrude on your lives, including your brothers', even though I don't know them. I don't want to be a burden to anyone."

We reached the car, and he guided me into the passenger seat. "Are you even listening to me?" My expression was serious. He looked at me and closed the door, then walked around to get behind the wheel. "I heard you perfectly fine. What makes you think you are a burden?" I knew the answer but didn't want to share it, so I stayed silent. "I'm still waiting for your answer, Angel," I gave him a stern look. "I don't want to answer that question right now. Ask me in about an hour, and maybe I'll tell you."

We remained silent for the rest of the drive to their house. Once we arrived and went inside, I finally noticed how beautiful their home was; it felt warm and peaceful. A wave of sadness washed over me as I tried to recall the comfort of my own home—the warmth and affection from my parents—which now seems like a distant memory, something I may never experience again. “Your house is really beautiful, and surprisingly clean for a house full of men”. He grinned back at me. “It must be something to do with our time in foster care. There were so many kids that everything always felt messy, so I guess it left its mark on us,” I walked over to the couch, and sat down, looking up at the ceiling. “Do you want some coffee?” he asked from the kitchen. “Yes, please, that would be great,” looking around the living room in admiration. Logan brought me my coffee and sat down next to me, turning to face me. “So, are you going to tell me why you think you’d be a burden?” I took a sip of my coffee, savoring the flavor, and squinted my eyes at him. “It hasn't been an hour. Do you need me to explain how time works?” He laughed, throwing his head back. I could easily get lost in that sound. “No, I know exactly how time works, but thanks for the offer. I’ll keep it in mind for when I forget. ‘Open book’, remember? That means every time one of us asks a question, the other has to answer.” I let out a frustrated sigh.

"I've been on the run for so long, constantly moving from town to town and keeping everyone at a distance. I honestly can't remember what a normal life feels like. I want to find a place to settle down and stay without constantly feeling the need to look over my shoulder. The reason I've kept people at arm's length is because I know that if I get close to anyone, they'll be at risk, and I don’t want anyone else to get hurt because of me. What I’m trying to say is that I don’t want to burden anyone with my problems. I know I’ll have to face my issues eventually, but I just don’t have the energy to do it right now.” I sipped my coffee in silence, not saying anything more.

"You know you can stay; you don’t have to run anymore. I’m here, and I’ll help you". For some reason, anger overwhelmed me at what he said. I jumped off the couch placing my cup on the coffee table, pacing back and forth in front of him. "No, I can’t stay. Unless I put that bastard six feet underground, or he manages to put me there first. I’ll never be free. He took everything from me and still controls every part of my life." Tears began to run down my face as I let all my frustration out. He remained seated on the couch while I vented, my voice rising with intensity. "I’m not your problem. I can’t be fixed. I’m damaged goods, and I never want to be the reason you do something you’ll regret. You deserve to be happy and live a life free without someone else’s burdens." I continued pacing when he finally spoke, "I already did." I froze, confusion written all over my face. "W-what do you mean, you already did?"

"Don’t ask a question if you’re not prepared for the answer. Just know that I have no regrets. It was a decision I made deliberately," he had a stern gaze.

I struggled to understand what he was saying. He got up from the couch, approached me and cupped my face in his hands, he tilted my head to meet his gaze, wiping my tears with his thumb. “I have answers to everything else you’ve mentioned, and I’m happy to share them. No one can be fixed—if that were possible, the world would be full of perfect people, but it’s not. You became my problem the moment I saw you at the bar.” I tried to respond, but he shook his head, so I remained silent. “You said I deserve to be happy, and I won’t be if you leave. Since you entered my life, I’ve felt an inexplicable pull toward you. Yes, we’re strangers, but I want to know everything about you. If you’re damaged, then so am I, and believe me, I’m beyond saving. We could be two damaged pieces that fit together as one.” He leaned in to kiss me, and I gladly responded leaning into him. We broke apart when the front door opened, and Logan’s brothers walked in.

I needed to wipe away the traces of my tears before facing everyone. After greeting them, I headed to Logan’s ensuite, shutting the door behind me, and sank to the floor, crying uncontrollably. It felt like the tears wouldn’t stop; after five years on the run, it seemed all the pent-up emotions were finally catching up with me. I stayed there for a while, trying to compose myself, knowing I had to go back out. Once I managed to calm down, I washed my face and walked out back to the guys in the living room,

I saw Brian in the kitchen preparing dinner, “Can I help with anything?” He turned and nodded approvingly. We spent the next hour working side by side in a pleasant silence—me chopping vegetables and him handling the rest. I haven’t felt this relaxed in ages. While Brian finished up, I set the table. It seems that their time in foster care left them with a belief that family meals should always be shared together, even though I’m not part of the family they insisted I join them.

We sat down to eat while the guys chatted about work. I couldn’t help but smile and enjoy their company. “Oh, your car is in the garage downstairs.” Justin told me, “You’re all my saviors; I owe you so much.” He shook his head, “You don’t owe us anything.”

I gave him a small, appreciative smile. After dinner, I instructed everyone to go sit down while I cleaned up. Initially, Brian and Logan resisted, but when I used my stern tone, they eventually complied. As I was rinsing the dishes before loading them into the dishwasher, I felt arms wrap around my waist. “Do you want to go stand in the corner?” Logan threw his head back laughing, which made me smile. "I’d like to see you try to put me in the corner and keep me there."