Hate or Love

Still My Lover

Estelle opened her eyes, and the first thing she saw was a naked chest. Her heart started pounding on her chest when she felt Victor's heavy arms around her body, trapping her on his chest.

How had they ended up in that position when they had fallen asleep both at the corners of the bed? She couldn't remember. All Estelle knew was that she didn't want to move. It felt warm and fuzzy, comforting even.

Like home.

She forbid the last thought out of her head. Victor wasn't her home. He would never be.

Raising her head a bit, she let herself admire his face instead. Had there ever been a more perfect man than him? It was the first time Estelle was watching his front hair fall loosely on the sides of his face instead of being tucked on the back of his head, and somehow it made him look less intimidating.

Just a young elf male with long light blonde hair that was sleeping on the same bed with her.

Just her lovely mate.

She found herself unconscionably stroking his hair, so gently, brushing them behind his pointy ear. Her thumb traced his cheek next, and then the line of his perfectly shaped jaw.

Their faces were close, inches away. Estelle closed her eyes and almost kissed him if only she didn't catch herself on time.

As if she was suddenly scared of her self, and what he could do to her body and her head as well, she tried moving away, run away from him as fast as possible. However, an arm held her firm in his body, not letting her move.

"Stay," Victor murmured, still half-asleep. "Stay in my arms just a little bit longer."

She closed her eyes, fighting with the conflicted emotions inside of her. How was it possible to need someone that much? How? Why was it so unfair?

"Victor, we need to get downstairs now, it's getting late," she told him in a soft voice, keeping her arms gathered on her chest.

"But you won't let me hold you again if I let you go now."

Her heart broke at the vulnerability in his voice. This wasn't like Victor at all. And the fact that she could bring up this soft side from him, it made her somehow want him even more, which by now, it wasn't possible.

But he was right. Estelle wouldn't let him hold her anymore. Because if she did, there was no more going back from there. She would give up to him, and finally be his.

And she wasn't going to do that anytime soon.

Victor Averell, King of Elfland was still her enemy. Still the murderer of her father. She might have forgotten this a few times on her way, but it was still buzzing on the back of her head, a reminder that made her have a little bit of self-control yet.

"Victor." Estelle was finally able to get away from his arms and get out of the bed. Instantly, she felt cold. Not because of the missing blankets, because of his missing arms.

This was becoming dangerous.

So, so dangerous.

When Estelle got out of the bathroom, almost ready to get out of the room, she saw Victor was ready as well, standing there tall and graceful with his arms behind his back, just like always.

"Good morning," she whispered, reaching for the bedside wooden table, to get the comb and brush her dirty blonde curls.

But Victor already had it on his hand. Without answering, he walked to her, starting to brush her hair softly, the whole time keeping eye contact with her through the mirror.

Somehow, it felt like the most intimate moment they had ever had. They had had two kisses by now, they had been flirting and bickering around a lot, yet nothing had felt like this.

Estelle was well aware, nothing would be the same after the night they had spent in each other's arms. She had made a grave mistake by coming here with him, and she would have to pay for it.

"Thank you." She averted his blue eyes in the mirror, looking at the curtains of the room instead. Why was it so hard to even say something sarcastic now? Hadn't they done this a lot? Throwing sarcastic remarks at each other the whole time? "You didn't have to," she added.

"But I wanted to," he finally spoke. "You're still my lover for the day."

She had no answer to that, but she knew the way her heart started slamming against her ribs was enough of an answer even to Victor.

A few minutes more, and they were ready to get downstairs and face Walton again.

Victor held her hand, reminding her it was act-time. As if anything had changed when they had been alone in the guest room.

"The lovebirds are finally awake!" Walton said, and if Estelle wouldn't get to know him a little bit the other day, she would say he was really happy to see them.

Just the way Victor looked at him was enough to show he didn't like the old elf, nor his strange humor.

"Good morning, Lord Walton," Estelle tried to smooth things over while faking a smile on her face and keeping her voice sing-song-like.

"Good morning, Princess." Walton took her hand in his and kissed the back of it. "Please, this way. My servants have prepared breakfast for you and the King."

Estelle acted as if she was honored by the gesture. "I really want to thank you for your hospitality," she continued, but her eyes grew wide when she saw David inside the dining room, seemingly waiting for them. "David?!" She almost shouted his name, shocked.

"Your Grace." David bowed down to her, a small smile playing on his face.

"I see you two have already met each other," Walton interrupted. "So I don't have to introduce you to my son, right, Princess?"

Instantly, she snapped her head at Victor, finding his eyes that averted away soon enough, for the very first time she had met him.

"No... you don't have to," she mumbled under her breath, still shocked. "It's nice to meet you again, David. I didn't think I would... see you here."

David smiled at her, a charming smile that almost drove Victor insane. "It's nice to meet you too, Estelle. I'm sorry I couldn't make it yesterday, but I'm happy you decided to stay."

Something didn't feel right about the way he said 'stay', without a definition after it, but Estelle tried to brush it off.

As soon as Walter and his son distanced themselves from them, instructing some servants around, she walked closer to Victor, reaching on her tiptoes to whisper in his ear, "Why didn't you tell me David was his son?" She asked, still confused.

"Because it didn't matter?" He answered bluntly, still avoiding her gaze, but his jaw was clenched. He was upset.

"Victor, of course it does matter! David is my friend."

"Exactly!" He snapped, but his voice was low still, and his hand hold hers instinctively, almost in a possessive matter. "I didn't want you to come here for him, I wanted you to come here for me."

She froze. Was Victor really jealous about her and David? Of course Estelle remembered him to be when he found them in each other's company, but she thought it was a momentary thing.

For someone who claimed to be cold and prideful, he was needy sometimes. And it was somehow endearing to watch.

They sat down on the well prepared table, next to each other, across Walton and David, along with Walton's wife that hadn't spoken a word even yesterday. The first conversations were simple, just small talk, before they switched to political ones.

Estelle was surprised to see how well-educated and diplomatic Victor was, when he had had no idea about court and King matters until a few months before. It was like it run in his blood, being a ruler.

"What is it that you really want, Lord Walton?" Victor blurted out, too tired of pretending. "There is something you want, isn't there?"

Walton smirked, clearly satisfied at the question. "Doesn't everyone, Your Majesty?"

"Then tell me and I will consider it," Victor said between gritted teeth.

"King Victor, I will bow down to you, become your strongest ally and your most loyal subject, only if..." Walton trailed off on purpose.

"If?"

"If Princess Estelle agrees to marry my son, Lord David."