Pride Prejudice and Prodigy

A Change of Heart

Chapter 17 ~ A Change of Heart

Elizabeth resolutely turned Georgiana away from the rose garden, and almost dragged her down the first path that would take them out of sight of the lovers: James Darlington and the Countess de Namur.

Georgiana seemed unconscious of their direction. She walked doggedly onwards, as quickly as possible, tears streaming down her cheeks. When they had gone a good distance from the rose garden, Elizabeth stopped Georgiana, and embraced her. Georgiana now began to cry in earnest. She spoke not a word as her sister attempted to comfort her. Eventually, Georgiana allowed herself to be led back to the house, where she straightaway rushed upstairs to her apartment.

Elizabeth instructed the butler to serve refreshments to her guests upon their return to the house, and requested him to give them her apologies: both she and Miss Darcy had taken too much sun, and would not be well enough to rejoin them. She then retired to her own apartment, for she had not the slightest wish of seeing either James Darlington or the Countess de Namur – ever again.

Elizabeth had refreshments sent up to Georgiana, but when she visited her sister's apartment, she saw that the food lay untouched. Elizabeth attempted to encourage her sister to speak, but she would not respond. Georgiana sat huddled in her favourite chair, her body shaking and shuddering with grief. All through the afternoon, she sobbed wordlessly. It was plain that she wished to be alone in her grief, so Elizabeth confined herself to looking in on her sister every hour. Georgiana's abject misery broke Elizabeth's heart, and there seemed nothing she could do to help her poor, suffering sister.

It was not until Elizabeth's final visit, at bedtime, that Georgiana finally spoke. Once started, the words gushed forth in a searing torrent. Georgiana recounted to Elizabeth every detail of what had passed between James Darlington and herself. She spoke of their profound friendship, which had swiftly transformed into the deepest, and most intense, love – for her, at least. It was only in the last few days that she had finally allowed herself to believe that he might return her love, while all the time, she feared that it must be eclipsed by the Countess de Namur, should that French siren desire him. But yet she loved him, despite all her fears, for she was entirely unable to do otherwise; her heart was his completely. And now it was utterly crushed and shattered.

There was nothing Elizabeth could say to ease Georgiana's pain. She hugged her, and knelt before her, holding her hands while she cried and cried, until exhaustion eventually overcame her, and she allowed herself to be helped to her bed.

***

The following morning, when Elizabeth entered her sister's apartment, she was surprised to find Georgiana at her toilet, preparing herself to go downstairs. Georgiana seemed entirely altered from the previous evening. It was as if all the emotion had drained out of her. She was calm and passive – lifeless almost – as if something had died within her during the night. It discomposed Elizabeth greatly to see her thus.

“Georgiana, I intend to go to Kympton directly after breakfast. I am so angry with Mr Darlington that if I do not tell him what an abominable, deceitful, rogue he is to his face, I shall never again feel at ease.”

“What good will it do? It is all too late now; it will make no difference,” said Georgiana, bleakly. “I never wish to see him again.”

“I will be most surprised if, following my dressing-down, he does not depart Derbyshire this very day. And I doubt, very much, that he will ever dare show his face in these parts again.”

Georgiana made no response; she just sat staring at her pale reflection in the mirror with unfocused eyes.

“My dear, you do not look well. Stay in your apartment; I shall have breakfast sent up.”

“I must go down later,” said Georgiana. “Lord William comes this morning.”

“Oh, dear, I forgot all about Lord William,” said Elizabeth. “Never mind, I shall send a message to The Grange, informing him that you are not well, and requesting him not to come. I shall also politely decline the invitation to visit Hampshire on your behalf.”

“No,” said Georgiana. “Do not send a message, I wish to speak with him.”

“Are you certain, my dear? Are you sure that you are strong enough? You know how persistent he can be. You will need all your wits about you to decline his invitation.”

“I do not intend to decline anything,” replied Georgiana.

“What? You intend to accept the invitation to visit Hampshire?”

“No, I intend to accept his offer of marriage.”

“Georgiana, are you certain you know what you are about?” demanded Elizabeth, in astonishment.

“Yes. I am certain; it is exactly what I want.”

“But… only yesterday, you told me that you had no love for him. How can you now be contemplating marriage?”

“I have no love for Lord William, it is true. I have no love for anyone any more. I gave all of my love to that man, and he tore it up and threw it away. There is no more; I shall never feel love again. Twice, in my life, have I entrusted my heart to a gentleman; and twice, was I utterly duped and deceived. Following the first occasion, I became cynical about love; I was no longer able to believe in it. I decided that it was all fancy and self-delusion. But when he appeared in my life, all my doubts gradually dissolved. This time I was certain that I had truly found love, of the highest order. It was an emotion so exquisite, so superior in every way to that first childish indulgence that I was convinced this time it was real. However, as it has transpired, on his side at least, it was nothing – nothing at all but my own wishful thinking and delusion. Never, again, shall I allow myself to believe in love.”

“My dear Georgiana, you have just experienced an enormous disappointment, and it is very natural that you should feel deflated and bitter about life… and love. But you are yet young, my dear, and these feelings will eventually diminish and pass with time. At this moment, when you are cast so low, it would be a very great mistake, I believe, to make a decision of this kind, and commit yourself to a marriage which will last your whole life long.”

“Lord William is a good man, and I am certain that my chances of happiness are as good with him as they can be with any other. And at least, with him, I may be sure that his affection is genuinely for myself, and not my fortune. When we marry, and I wish for it as soon as may be, he will take me away from here, and away from the Darlingtons. I do not blame Lady Darlington or Julia in the least; but I cannot see them without thinking of him – and that, I cannot support!”

“Georgiana, my dear, you are in no state to make such a decision. Lord William may indeed be the very best match for you; I have always liked him very much. But today is not the day on which to make such an important decision – even though, perhaps, it may be the right one. You are not yourself.”

“Oh yes, I am very much myself,” said Georgiana, gravely. “Yesterday, I was not myself; I was distraught and discomposed. Today I am most certainly myself – or at least that which remains. Something has died within me; an emotion that I shall never again know or feel. I may not be happy, but my mind is clear and rational. Do you believe I am better to remain here, like this? Dwelling on all that has been, and all that might have been? Dwelling on that which is now lost forever? Would you have me live out my life in bitterness, consumed by disappointed dreams? In marrying Lord William, I shall leave this sad episode behind. I shall make new friends in Hampshire, and strive to make him a good wife. At least I shall have something to aspire to, something to occupy my mind… something to stop me thinking about…”

“Then I shall not go to Kympton, Georgiana; I shall stay here with you.”

“And do what? Tell Lord William I may not marry him? You know perfectly well that my brother has already sanctioned the match.”

“No, that I would never do.”

Georgiana sighed deeply. “Then go to Kympton and say what you must say. Leave me here at Pemberley, to say what I must say. I know my own mind; I am no longer a naïve young girl.”

***

Elizabeth was shown into the sitting room at Kympton, where all the occupants of the house were gathered. She found herself unable to say the harsh words she had intended to Mr Darlington, out of respect for Lady Darlington, who loved her deceiving and undeserving son so excessively. Elizabeth decided that she must wait until they were alone to do justice to his treachery… and her anger.

When the pleasantries were completed, she said, “I come with news from Pemberley; although it will hardly be a very great surprise to any of you.” They all looked at her expectantly. “Georgiana is to marry Lord William Beauchamp.”

She stared straight at James Darlington as she uttered these words. He looked suddenly grave, and the blood drained from his face. “No!” he said, jumping to his feet, and rushing from the room.

The three ladies sat in stunned silence. Elizabeth felt most uncomfortable. Finally, the countess spoke. “Mrs Darcy, is it possible that Miss Darcy was in the vicinity of the rose garden at Pemberley, yesterday? And did she, perchance, happen to see Mr Darlington and myself there?”

Elizabeth coloured. “Yes, we were there together. We saw the two of you beside the sun dial. You have no idea of how greatly it discomposed Miss Darcy,” said Elizabeth accusingly.

“So discomposed, that she has decided to accept Lord William's addresses?” asked Julia.

Elizabeth nodded gravely.

“But is it final? Has she given Lord William her word? Is it really too late?” asked Lady Darlington anxiously.

“Too late?” repeated Elizabeth, confused.

“Has Georgiana positively accepted Lord William's offer of marriage?” demanded Julia.

“She is utterly and irrevocably determined to marry him,” said Elizabeth.

“But she has not yet given him her promise?” asked Lady Darlington, urgently.

“No, he comes to Pemberley this morning, and Georgiana is resolved to accept him.”

The countess jumped to her feet. “She must not! Have you come in your carriage?”

“Yes, of course,” replied Elizabeth, becoming increasingly bewildered.

“Then you must return to Pemberley, immediately! And I must accompany you! I must speak with Georgiana!” said the countess imploringly, as she attempted to pull Elizabeth to her feet.

Elizabeth was stunned. Lady Darlington and Julia had also risen to their feet, and together with the countess, hurried Elizabeth from the house.

“I shall explain everything to you in the carriage, Mrs Darcy,” said the countess.

***

As they alighted from the carriage they saw a gentleman approaching the main entrance. It was Lord William. Upon seeing them, he stopped and came towards them.

“You must detain him,” whispered the countess to Elizabeth, “while I speak with Georgiana.”

Elizabeth nodded. After they had made their formal greetings, Elizabeth said, “Lord William, I must apologise on behalf of Miss Darcy. She was a little indisposed this morning, and I fear that she is not yet ready to receive you. Would you care to take some air with me?”

“It would be my great pleasure, Mrs Darcy,” he said without suspicion.

The butler showed the countess into the morning room, where Georgiana sat stiffly in her chair, awaiting Lord William. Upon seeing the countess, she rose, ashen-faced, to her feet and without troubling with the usual pleasantries, said angrily, “How dare you enter this house! Please leave immediately; and do not return, so long as it remains my home. I never wish to see you again!”

“I am here at the express invitation of Mrs Darcy,” replied the countess, resolutely. “There is something I must tell you; something that your sister wishes you to hear – something that you must hear!”

“Please leave me!” cried Georgiana, glaring at the French woman. “There is nothing you can have to say that I should ever wish to hear.”

“You are angry with me, because you saw Mr Darlington and me together in the rose garden yesterday.”

“Yes! I saw you! Why have you come? To taunt me? To thrust your dagger deeper into my heart and twist it?”

“No. I have come to tell you that Mr Darlington and I are not lovers; that we have never been lovers.”

“How do you expect me to believe such brazen lies, when yesterday I saw you two standing together by the sun dial, holding hands, and gazing into each other's eyes like the most devoted of lovers? There is no other explanation.”

“Yes, there is! What you and Mrs Darcy saw yesterday was an act; a charade; a sham.”

“An act? I do not believe you, madam! You must think me some kind of silly, naïve, girl, who is gullible enough to believe such preposterous falsehoods. Or, perhaps, you believe me to be so besotted with Mr Darlington that I will grasp at any straw that might allow me to again be deceived by that insincere rogue? You are wasting your renowned acting abilities on me, madam, for I am no longer an innocent… I am no longer deceived by that scoundrel.”

“Let me ask you, Miss Darcy: how can you be certain that what you witnessed yesterday, from quite a distance, was real, and not an act?”

“Because I had already seen enough of you and Mr Darlington in each other's company, both in London and here in Derbyshire, to suspect that you have long been lovers. Of course, I tried to persuade myself that it was not so; to delude myself into believing that it was all my own imagination. But there was nothing imaginary about what I saw yesterday.”

“You are quite mistaken in the matter, Miss Darcy. What you saw yesterday, was an act, a performance, intended to create the illusion of a liaison between Mr Darlington and myself.”

“You are making not the slightest sense! Why would you and Mr Darlington wish to convince either Mrs Darcy, or myself, that you are lovers, if you were not?” demanded Georgiana.

“The performance was not intended for you and Mrs Darcy.”

“Then, for whom was it intended?” demanded Georgiana distrustfully.

“Miss Beauchamp.”

“Gwendolyn? But why?”

“Can you not guess? Between her and Lady Beauchamp, poor Mr Darlington has had no peace. Miss Beauchamp is constantly pursuing him. Her mother engages in increasingly transparent hints of her desire for them to marry, and he is too gentle and considerate of them both to rebuff Miss Beauchamp outright. So, I conceived of the plan for her to catch us en flagrant délit, and so end all her hopes of receiving Mr Darlington's addresses.”

“How can I be sure you are telling the truth? It looked entirely real to both myself and Mrs Darcy.”

“I would certainly hope so; I am an actress, after all. But if you cannot trust me, you may ask Julia Darlington, who also played a part in the deception. It was she, who led Miss Beauchamp to the rose garden; although by a different route, and to a different entrance, than that taken by Mrs Darcy and yourself.”

Georgiana felt weak at the knees and had to sit down, in the light of this new information, which she realised must be true. Whatever she might have allowed herself to believe of Mr Darlington, Julia would never lie to her. The countess must be telling the truth: it was all an act.

“You said, before, that you and Mr Darlington have never been lovers; yet you seem to be very well acquainted.”

“But of course. He and my late husband, the Count de Namur were very good friends. My husband was a brilliant composer. He stayed one summer at Darlington Hall before we married. Mr Darlington was later our guest in Namur. Sadly, my husband died three years ago, and with all the recent troubles Bonaparte is making on the continent, I decided to seek refuge in England for a time. Mr Darlington was kind enough to assist me in establishing myself here.”

“Sometimes, countess, when I see you look at Mr Darlington, I see an affection which exceeds mere friendship.”

The countess sighed. “I shall be honest with you, Miss Darcy, and confide in you something I have spoken of to no one. I have always considered Mr Darlington one of the most exceptional gentlemen of my acquaintance. When I encountered him in London for the first time in several years, I found myself feeling very differently towards him, than previously, when the count was alive. I must admit to being fascinated by him, drawn to him – desiring him. I began imagining how it might be if we were to become lovers, or even perhaps to marry. Though it was a most attractive idea, I could also see difficulties: Naturally, I wish to return to France when peace is restored; whereas he is so very close to his mother and sister that he would not wish to leave England.

“But this was all in my fancy, you understand, Miss Darcy. We women like to indulge in such things. My dreams did not last very long, because I soon realised that I could never win his heart; which I must tell you, was a most unusual experience for me. It soon became apparent to me that his heart belonged entirely to another, and there was absolutely no hope that it could ever be mine. It was quite a puzzle, because I had not the slightest idea of the identity of this extraordinary creature who had captured the most worthy of hearts.”

“And have you since discovered it?” asked Georgiana hesitantly.

“Oh yes,” replied the countess smiling. “I knew it instantly, the moment Mr Darlington introduced you to me in Lady Basildon's supper room. There was not the slightest doubt in my mind, that the possessor of his heart was you, Miss Darcy.”

“Me?” asked Georgiana.

“Yes, of course it was you; and still it is you; and if you will allow me the audacity to speak it: I am certain that he possesses your heart in equal measure. Is it not so?”

“Yes, it is so,” replied Georgiana accepting the warm embrace of the countess and crying with joy.

The two ladies found they had much to say, and were presently joined in their delightful conversation by Elizabeth, who had been presumptuous enough to inform Lord William that Miss Darcy, with the greatest of gratitude, had chosen to decline Lady Beaumont's kind invitation to visit Hampshire. Elizabeth had also confidentially counselled the gentleman, that contrary to his mother's hopes and aspirations, it was her belief that there was not the slightest likelihood of his present attentions to Miss Darcy bearing fruit. She gently, but firmly, advised him of the wisdom of looking elsewhere.