The assault on Jackson’s fortifications was a fiasco, costing the British two thousand casualties including three generals and seven colonels, all of it in the span of only thirty minutes. Amazingly, Jackson’s rowdy outfit had lost less than one hundred men. Future President James Monroe, who had, of course, not yet devised the Monroe Doctrine, which essentially would tell Europeans, and everyone else, to “stay the Hell out of the Western Hemisphere,” would later praise the General, and future President by saying, “History records no example of so glorious a victory obtained with so little bloodshed on the part of the victorious.” The stunned British army lingered in Louisiana for the next several days, most scavenging for crawfish and flying fowl, and dodging alligators, though a few hear
