After My Death, He Regretted Madly

Chapter 6

A thick, suffocating silence hung in the car.

The ring in the evidence bag felt like a sharp steel needle, stabbing through my chest until all I had left inside was a hollow, gaping void.

I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that it was the engagement ring I'd shared with Javier.

But the day I'd agreed to go undercover, I'd erased every single trace of my connection to him. This diamond ring, etched with his name, had been the first thing I'd hidden away.

I'd always imagined the next time this ring saw the light of day would be when I completed my mission successfully.

I'd stand under the bright sun, walk up to Javier, and tell him I was back to keep our promise.

Why on earth was a ring that was supposed to be tucked under my bed at home here now, being held up as ironclad proof that I'd betrayed everyone?

My stomach dropped like a stone. 'Mom… something must have happened to Mom!'

Just then, Javier spoke, his voice cold enough to frost over the glass. "We can try lifting fingerprints from the ring. It'll be rock-solid evidence to build the case against Jennifer."

I stared at his cold, indifferent eyes, and it felt like someone had stuffed a waterlogged cotton ball down my throat. I could barely draw a breath, my chest tight and burning.

A bitter ache crept up the tip of my heart, and I flashed back to the day he'd proposed.

His hands had been shaking as he slid the ring onto my finger, but his voice had been steady as a rock.

"Jennifer, I'll love you as fiercely as I cherish my oath."

Times had changed, though. His faith still stood as strong as ever, but every last bit of the love he'd had for me was gone without a trace.

The sunlight streaming through the car window seemed to pass right through my soul, and all I felt was endless, bone-deep cold.

"Javier, I have never betrayed my faith."

Once the whole mess at Evercrest Building was wrapped up, I followed the rest of the team back to the station, just like old times.

But right before we crossed the bridge, Javier spoke up. "Stop the car. I want to walk alone for a while."

No one tried to stop him.

I followed him down to the riverside beach, staring at his tall, lonely back. For a split second, I was right back at Frederico's funeral a year prior.

Everyone had turned out for that service. The air had been so thick with grief you could barely breathe.

Javier, Frederico's star protégé, had stood at the very front of the crowd. The raw sorrow in his eyes had cut right through the distance between us and stabbed me straight in the heart.

I'd hidden behind a tree that day. I didn't even have the right to cry.

I'd waited until every last person was gone, then walked to the spot where Javier had stood, knelt and bowed deeply, three solid, loud thuds.

"Don't worry, Frederico. I, Jennifer, will finish this mission successfully even if it costs me my life!"

*****

Javier, who'd been walking ahead of me, suddenly stopped in his tracks. I snapped back to the present and skidded to a halt, barely an inch away from him.

Then I watched as he pulled a red string out from under the neck of his shirt.

Hanging from it was the other engagement ring from our set. The very one.

My eyes went wide in shock. I stared up at him, only to see him yank the string off his neck, a cold, mocking glint in his downcast eyes.

In the next breath, he snapped his arm back to hurl it.

I lunged forward on instinct, screaming, "Don't!"

But the ring strung on that red cord passed straight through my ghostly form, as if I wasn't even there.

I couldn't feel physical pain anymore, but at that moment, it felt like something had slammed into me hard enough to shatter me into a million pieces.

I spun around to look at the river. All that was left was a tiny, rippling circle on the surface, fading fast.

My eyes burned red hot. All the raw, tangled emotions I'd been shoving down for days finally threatened to spill over.

'What if I'd mailed the evidence ahead of time instead of hiding it on me? Could I have avoided this whole mess?'

What if I'd caught the flaw in the plan before it was too late? Could I have saved the brothers who died in that explosion?

I grilled myself over and over, as if tearing into myself like this was the only way to drown out the searing pain of feeling like my heart was being ripped straight out of my chest.

Javier stared at the water, his eyes dark and unreadable as a stormy night.

"Jennifer, the only way Frederico, Captain Carmona, and all the fallen brothers can rest in peace is to bring you to justice."

At that moment, the river wind whooshed right through my soul, sharp as a bone-scraping blade.

It was nearly dusk by the time Javier made it back to the criminal police unit.

The second he stepped through the gate, I saw every single member of the team lined up at rigid attention in the courtyard.

A jolt of unaccountable panic shot through me.

Captain Morgan stepped forward and handed Javier a sheet of paper covered edge to edge with handwriting.

"The joint petition you asked for is ready. Every last guy on the team signed off, no objections."

Javier took the paper, and I craned to look at it over his shoulder.

My pupils shrank to pinpricks in an instant.

Joint Petition from the New York City Police Criminal Investigation Division to Revoke All Honors Awarded to Jennifer!