This Feeling, It's Killing Me

Chapter 1

“Raku. How were the holidays?”

“Boring.” Raku replied.

The word boring had a totally different meaning for Raku. Raku, a 17 year old boy was attending his last years of school. His life was stuck in a never-ending cycle of food, study and homework. Nothing interested him anymore. Except his friend Dan. But Even Dan was tiring sometimes.

“Let me guess, A vacation to the mountains?” Dan asked.

“Yep mostly.” Raku answered.

“How’s that boring? That’s the ideal holiday plan.” Dan asked clearly perplexed.

“We have very different definitions of boring my friend.” Raku replied as he removed and wiped his glasses.

Both boys walked down the street chatting for a while. Morning breeze blew in the cold streets. The sun wasn’t up yet. It was rising, slowly. The boys walked down the line of merchants opening their shops. The whole town was waking up. Dressed in their uniforms, the boys were equally excited for the new semester, however having their own ways of expressing it.

“So any plans for the new semester?” Dan asked.

“I don’t see anything changing. Everything’s gonna be mostly the same I guess.” Raku replied.

“Well, this is our last year, Have to go through it with a blast. Try my luck with the ladies, if you know what I mean.”

“Come on Dan. Everyone knows that’s not going to happen, ever.”

“Yeah you’re probably right. But I’d like to give it a shot once. You should too.”

“No thanks. I’ve had my fair share of public embarrassments.” Raku replied.

Dan paused for a moment.

“Dude you’re 17. Children half your age know how to ride a bicycle. How did you think you won’t be embarrassed?” Dan said.

Raku stopped walking suddenly.

“Hey!” Raku agitated. “Not everyone knows how to ride a bicycle. Besides there were more important things I was busy with.”

“Say that to all those girls you rushed into.” Dan said smiling slyly.

“Urgh! I knew I shouldn’t have listened to you that day.”

“Whatever sails your boat.”

The both walked on for about 10 more minutes. A flock of girls approached. Both the boys looked at them for some time, sharing looks in between. One of the girls noticed the boys staring at them. Raku immediately turned his head the other way. Dan, however continued the gaze and also waived at the girl. The girl returned the waive with a smile.

“She seems kinda cute.” Dan said.

“Yeah. She does actually.” Raku replied.

They walked ahead for a few more minutes. Dan was telling his story about how his uncle took him to fishing at his ranch, and how he nearly fell into the lake. Raku was listening to him, often ending up laughing.

“Hey Dude,” Dan began “What’s the first lecture today?”

“Sometimes Dan,” Raku replied with borrowed gentility “I wish I could be that careless.”

“I don’t know man. I’m one of a kind.” Dan replied.

“Anyways. It’s Math first today.”

“Ugh! I’m gonna get so sleepy right away.” Dan pulled his hair.

“Okay crybaby. Let’s get some coffee first. That’ll help you maybe.”

“Yeah! Coffee sounds great. Let’s go! Besides we can even run into Sophie.” Dan said.

Raku’s heart skipped a beat at the mention of the name.

“Really?” He asked meekly.

“Well yeah, Sophie lives right off this block, You know that don’t you?” Dan asked.

Raku shook his head negatively.

“To be honest, I didn’t expect any better from you.” Dan said.

Within a few minutes, both of them walked out of the cafe with a sipper mugs in their hands.

“Nothing compares to the joy of holding a warm coffee cup in your hands.” Dan said taking a quick sip from his mug.

Raku and Dan shared an exceptional love for coffee. Raku absolutely loved every aspect of it.

“That Dan, is the first reasonable thing you said today.” Raku said with a genuine smile.

“Aren’t you drinking it?” Dan said with half his mug already done.

“Well, Coffee is nothing to be gulped, you have to savor it slowly. Let it dance on your taste buds, slowly. Just like this.”

Raku proceeded to put the cup up, towards his lips. Ready to let the divine taste touch his tongue. The first gulp was in his mouth. He closed his eyes. The coffee was amazing. He could feel the caffeine kicking in. He was drooling in the joy. Just then he was bumped into, a strong thrust hit him spilling the coffee all over his white shirt.

He was alarmed at the sudden barging in. He immediately looked around, searching for the intruder.

He looked ahead of him and saw a young girl, probably around his age. Her long brown hair flying around as she jostled around, trying to regain balance. Small streams of coffee spread all over her purple jacket. She turned around and looked straight at Raku, in the eyes. Her aqua blue eyes were filled with fury. Her cheeks turned cherry red. Her expressions quickly turned from clueless to straight up pissed.

“Hey watch out!” Raku said angrily looking all over his stained shirt and dipped tie.

“You i***t! You spilled hot coffee right onto me. And you’re such an insolent that you’re not even apologizing.” The girl raged.

“What the -. You should be the one apologizing. It was you who rushed into me in the first place.” Raku replied with equal rage.

“Hey keep it down you too.” Dan intervened.

“Shut it Wonder Boy!” The girl fumed at Dan before returning to Raku.

Raku was equally ready to fight back at her, but the girl was too intimidating. However, Raku wasn’t going to back out this easy.

“Hey Whippersnapper listen over her.” She looked at Raku. “You better apologize or I’m going to gauge your eyes right now and shove ‘em up your-“

Just then her phone started buzzing. She gave it a look.

“Ugh! Now I’m late.” She said.

The girl stormed off in the opposite direction.

Raku looked at his coffee-stained shirt.

“Ugh! This is not good.” Raku exclaimed.

“Not good? This is brutal dude.” Dan replied.

“Yeah, It’s the first day. I’m gonna make a terrible first impression!”

“Dude! You just got owned. By a girl!”

“No I didn’t.” Raku defended.

“Didn’t look like that from here.”

“Wait here, I’ll be back from the washroom.” Raku said.

“I’m not waiting dude. I’mma head out straight, don’t wanna be seen with a Whippersnapper.” Dan said sheepishly.

“Don’t call me that!” Raku exclaimed “Ugh! Fine. Go on. I’ll catch up.”

Raku returned from the washroom after a few minutes. His shirt still wet showed signs of a messy big coffee stain.

He looked around for Dan but his absence didn’t surprise him.

“Ugh! Stupid girl. That too on the first day. Can my life be any more uninteresting.” Raku exclaimed.

Raku was totally bummed up for the day. There was nothing that could cheer him up.

He felt something hard beneath his feet. He bent down to see it. It was something white, something round. He picked it up to examine it. It was a pearl earring.

“Good Morning Raku!” A feminine voice greeted.

Raku recognized the voice. Heck, He’d recognize the voice even in his dreams. He quickly hid the earring in his pocket.

He turned around to face a fair-skinned teenage girl with shoulder-length dark-brown hair that had one long strand of hair which she keeps combed neatly to the left side of her face and chocolate brown eyes. She wore a white school uniform and a black hoodie jacket. Her face had a warm friendly welcoming smile which instantly melted Raku.

“G-Good Morning Sophie.” Raku returned the greeting.

‘Sophie is here. This is really great!’ Raku thought to himself as he smiled cheek to cheek in his mind.

“Looks like you love coffee a way too much Raku.” A coldly familiar female voice appeared.

A girl stood beside Sophie. Her name was Tiffany. Tiffany was a bit shorter than her and had a stone cold face. Her stern look stayed the same always. As long as Raku could remember, he had never seen Tiffany having any other expression.

‘And the day just got even worse. Sophie has seen me like this. What would she think of me?’ Raku said to himself.

“I um- sort of had an accident.” Raku replied.

“Oh that seems bad. Your shirt is all stained!” Sophie replied with a worried expression on her face.

“I’m alright Sophie. Don’t worry.” Raku replied.

‘Damn. Sophie is really kind. She worries for everyone around her. She is just too good.’ Raku thought.

“Hey Raku. Care to join us?” Tiffany said.

“What?! Are you serious?” Raku said trying to hide his obvious joyful shock.

“Tiff!” Sophie said in a shocked whisper and wide eyed expression on her face.

“Well, We are heading the same way. It’s okay if you don’t want to. Like I understand.” Tiffany continued in a monotonous pitch.

“Yes Raku, We’ll love to have you.” Sophie replied.

“WHAAAT!!? Sophie will LOVE to have me. This is really great.” Raku thought.

They walked silently for a few minutes. Raku ensured he maintained a perfect distance between himself and Tiffany as not to make things any awkward. He looked at Sophie and looked back again. Whenever they caught each other looking at the other, they’d immediately turn the other way.

‘What am I doing?” Raku thought. “This is perfect. I should talk with Sophie. What should I say? Maybe something cool. No, I can’t pull off cool. Maybe something romantic? Or will it be too cheesy? Let’s talk about the weather. Yeah! That seems cool. Maybe I’ll notch it up with the conversation going. That sounds good. Start small’

“So Sophie.” Raku started.

“Did you hear about yesterday’s killings?” Tiffany intercepted.

‘That escalated quickly.’ Raku thought.

“Yes, actually. It sounded really awful.” Sophie answered.

“Yeah. The killings are really getting out of hand now.” Raku replied.

“My mom doesn’t allow me to go anywhere alone nowadays.” Sophie said.

“Times are hard nowadays. I hope the cops catch the murderer soon.” Raku said.

“Raku.” Tiffany said. “You’re the only one who comes from Westside right?”

“Yes actually. I walk alone to and from home every day.” Raku replied.

‘I’m sure Sophie will think I’m really brave.’ Raku gained a bit more confidence as he thought.

“Oh Raku. You should look for some company. A guy like you can get hunted down like a matchstick.” Tiffany said.

All his gained confidence shattered.

“I can take care of myself. Besides, there’s actually no one else from there so I don’t have any other option.” Raku replied.

“Hey Tiffany, I heard the family that got killed lived near you.” Sophie said.

“Oh, Yes. They moved in a couple of years ago. A couple and their daughter. They’d always be on the roof with their little telescope.”

“The police report mentioned a telescope.” Raku said.

“Well they were a fan of the stars. And now they’re with them finally.” Tiffany said.

‘Whoah. Not even a stutter. She’s got a really dark twisted mind.’ Raku thought.

They walked on for a while more until they finally reached school. Raku checked his wristwatch. They were about 10 minutes early. Raku looked at his shirt.

“You guys go ahead. I’ll see if I can do something about this.” Raku said.

He turned around and walked away.

“Hey Tiff. Do you think he’ll find some way to cover the stain? Poor fellow, I wish I could help.” Sophie asked.

“You could’ve offered your hoodie.” Tiffany said.

“Oh no! How foolish of me.” Sophie exclaimed. “I could’ve offered my jacket. It was perfect.”

Sophie suddenly went into a remorseful state.

“I thought you didn’t wanted to. He looked like he was waiting for you to offer it.” Tiffany said.

Sophie’s remorse turned worse.

“I’ll give him my jacket the first chance I get.” Sophie said.

Both of them walked to the classroom. Tiffany walked fast but Sophie often stood in the corridors looking around. After a few minutes they were in the classroom. All the seats were nearly occupied except a few stray ones here and there. They looked around but Raku was nowhere to be found. His seat was vacant. Sophie sat on her desk. It was fairly distant from Raku’s desk. It always had been. But as usual Tiffany was right beside her. The minute hand started nearing 12. Students started coming in. All the seats were filling in pretty quickly. Sophie took a quick peek behind. The desk was still empty.

Raku arrived after a few minutes. His shirt still showing the big brown spot. He quietly walked in and sat on his desk.

She looked behind. A seat close to Raku’s was unclaimed. She wanted to claim it before it was too late. But she kept holding back. All these years, as close she wanted to be with Raku. She just didn’t have enough courage to walk up to him. But, this was their last year together. Who knows if there will even be a second time? She had to take this leap of faith. She had to give him a chance. At last this was the last year. She had to let it loose this time.

She rose up from her seat.

Just then the Class teacher Ms Park walked in.

“Good Morning Students.” She said loud and clear.

All the students quickly rose from their seats to greet the teacher. Sophie stood up too, feeling grief about the lost opportunity.

“I see everyone’s here in time.” Ms Park said.

Sophie quickly took a peak behind.

“Not everyone.” Dan replied. “Some students are running late today.”

“Well they better have a good reason to. Besides we only seem to have two empty desks.” Ms Park replied. One of them being the last desk while the other one right besides Raku.

Just then a loud thudding of feet was heard from the corridor and then a quick series of knocks on the door.

“Come in.” Ms Park said.

A boy entered the room. Undone uniform, messy hair, still sleepy.

“Late Larry is here.” Dan said.

He looked around the classroom. He walked towards Raku. Raku nodded his head negatively. He didn’t wanted to spend yet another year sitting beside Larry. 4th grade was enough. Larry readily walked further back to the last desk.

“Anyways. As I was saying. We have a new student joining us today.” Ms Park said.

Just then the door opened. A girl walked in. Striking aqua eyes, long brown eyes. A warm greeting expression on her face. She was wearing the usual uniform with a purple hoodie over. Her hoodie was freshly wiped but had some stains over it. She looked around at her classmates.

“Good Morning Everyone. My name is Penelope, but you can call me Penny. I hope to spend a good year ahead and hopefully make some good friends.” Her sound filled with excitement.

Her eyes met Raku’s. They identified each other quickly. She was the girl from the coffee store. Both of their faces turned from shocked to agitated.

“Thank you Penelope. Please take your seat.”