Assassin X

Raven

What had happened? Raven was running silently back through the alleys and knew that she had to go to Papa's, she had to tell him that she had missed the mark. But why she had missed the mark she had no idea. She had done everything she was supposed to, pulled him out of the restaurant, made sure he was alone, and then quiet as a cat snuck up behind him, ready to strike.

But someone had been there too. In the same alleyway that she had been. Quietly following behind her just as she'd been following behind Elias.

She didn't want to go to Papa's house and tell him that she'd failed. Partly because she'd never failed before, partly because she was almost relieved she hadn't made the kill.

It wasn't as if killing the other men had felt good, it was just that she believed in Papa and the words he spoke. She believed he wanted to right the city and the world and take over to make a better place. And those she'd already gotten to hadn't left the world sadder with them no longer in it. But when Papa had told her about Elias, her next mark, something hadn't felt right.

Sure, he'd cheated his way into power, and stolen money, and maybe wasn't the best person to be running a school district, but there was nothing he'd done that he deserved to die for. Those others had hurt and killed people, but Elias had just been a scummy person.

Yet, she followed Papa's word as if it were her Bible. After all, he had believed in her when no one else had. How could she not follow his every word? Still, she was relieved that the hit didn't work on Elias, not until she could feel comfortable with doing it.

When Papa found out what had happened, what was he going to say? He'd never been angry with her before, he'd always been so proud of her, but she imagined when he found out she'd let Elias escape then she'd be in trouble. Sick to her stomach, she trolled the streets thinking it through, trying to find a bit of courage to tell him what had happened.

She wasn't even sure she did know what happened exactly, but the call had to be made. He'd be expecting her to call to tell him the deed was done, he wouldn't be expecting to hear she had failed.

The phone rang twice before his voice picked up, always smooth like silk and she had found comfort in hearing his voice.

"Hi Papa," she said, the worrisome feeling seeping out immediately.

"Raven,”he greeted.“How did it go?”

She took a deep breath and forced her words out, the frost of her breath floating in the air in front of her.

"I failed Papa.”

Raven was sitting on a freezing bench looking out at a lake. The blackness of the water, still in the night, looked like it could swallow her whole. The last time she'd felt so alone, so scarred of what may happen next was when she'd been living on the streets, right before Papa had saved her. Had he not found her and taken her down to her cell, she didn't know how much longer she could have lasted. Squatting in ram-shackle homes with no heat and rats running around, the cold constantly making her sick no matter how many blankets she stole, the lack of food making her stomach churn in hunger pains almost constantly.

Papa had brought her out of all of that. And up until then she'd been a good child, one of his best. He doted on her constantly and she always accepted it.

But Raven had let him down at the most crucial moment so far.

"What do you mean you failed?”His voice still sounded like his own but there was an edge to it, one that she hadn't heard before and she couldn't help but wince.

"Something happened, he got away.”

Dead silence.

A shiver ran up her spine and she felt herself cower in worry about what was going to happen next, what he might say to her.

"Where are you?”he asked.

"Black Stone Lake,”she answered. Papa would have to know that she was on her way to see him but she had chickened out.

"We can't talk about this while you're in public. I'll see you in my office,”he said sharply and hung up the phone.

Tears were springing to her eyes and she knew that most people with real parents probably felt this way when they got in trouble. Maybe if they took the car without asking or snitched money out of their mother's purse. But Raven knew she felt worse than all of those children because if Papa tossed her out then where would she be? What would become of her?

The answer was as clear as the cloudless night; she'd be alone and back on the streets without a family to protect her.

Stalling for as long as she could she watched the water, finding it remarkable how much it looked like glass when it was calm. The reflections of the city lights were a perfect mirror image of the world she lived in. What would it be like to drown, she wondered fleetingly?

Would it be peaceful under the water, watching the world from above in the silent bubble of being underneath it all? Or would it feel frigid and panicky as you watched the world above slip away but you were powerless to stop it?

Those thoughts should have seemed depressing but they didn't, not to Raven, a trained killer. The questions didn't mark those of someone suicidal but instead of someone curious. How could a trained killer not be curious about death and the way the grim reaper came to take her victim's lives?

There was no sense in putting off the inevitable any longer, she needed to tell Papa that someone had been following her, that it was her fault for not being more careful and letting her mark get away.

Raven stood from the bench, her body numb from the cold, and listened to the crunch of stones underneath her boots. She bent and picked one up, admiring its smooth texture and the weight of it in her palm. Turning it over and over until she had it memorized, she suddenly tossed it forward, letting it sail down toward the water, losing sight of it in the night.

The glass picture below her shattered as the ripples ripped through the water from the tiny stone she had put into the world.

***

Papa had brandy waiting in a shining crystal glass the moment she walked into his office. The warmth filled her body as she felt herself begin to thaw out from her time on the bench.

"Raven, please, sit,” he told her.

Raven took the glass she was offered and sat in her favorite leather chair, hoping that it wouldn't be the last time.

"You need to tell me what happened,” he pushed her.

His voice had lost is edge but his eyes carried a storm that she knew he was trying to hold back from her

"I don't know what happened Papa. I went through with the plan, made a threatening phone call so that he would leave alone, and I was in the perfect hiding place. I was right behind him, just mere steps, and I thought I had him, I would have had him. But then there was a noise behind me, like someone had kicked something, and it banged down the sidewalk.”

Papa hadn't sat down to hear her story. Instead he peered into the fireplace, its flames roaring warmth that she couldn't feel.

"I turned to look back and didn't see anyone. At first I thought it as maybe a stray cat or something but I felt eyes on me, someone was watching. When I turned back around, Elias was far out of my reach so I slid back into the alley and ran as fast as I could away from there.”

"You're sure someone was watching you?”

Raven thought about that. She hadn't seen anyone at all, not even any movement, but she had felt it, there had been someone watching her just as she'd been watching Elias.

"I can't be positive, but I know what my instinct told me,”she said with confidence. After all, it was Papa that had trained her to use her senses, to harness her instincts, and be what she was.

"Did they see who you were?”

Raven shook her head. “It was so dark, if I didn't see them they couldn't have seen me.”

"I thought when I made the call to the police that something like this may happen, I just didn't think it would happen to you.”

The way he said it, there was no denying how disappointed he was in her. Raven felt her insides coil tightly, upset that she'd made such a big mistake.

"I can tail him again, I can get him next time. I know it,” Raven pleaded.

Papa shook his head and she didn't argue further.

He looked at the clock on the mantle and she listened with him as the seconds ticked by. After leaving her cell underground she was much more aware of the power of time.

"It's late, you have a shift at the coffee house in the morning. Go home. I will figure something out.”

There was no warmth in his voice and Raven felt as cold as she had sitting out on that icy bench. But she knew better than to argue with him. Instead, she stood silently and set the brandy on the end table, the drink not even touched.

As she walked home she thought about the coffee shop, it was the only thing that made her feel light in her life. Every other aspect of her life was shrouded in mystery and the only contact she had was with Papa and the family. But in the coffee shop, she was able to talk and laugh, just as the rest of the world did. So even though she lay her head down on her pillow that night, restless and scared, she woke to her alarm without pause to get to work on time.

She may have to live a life of secrets, but at least when she was behind that counter, with the customers and co-workers surrounding her, she felt as if she lived a normal life like anyone else. And now that she'd met Alex, there was a little extra motivation that came along with it. She had a secret hope that she would see that smooth talking vanilla latte drinking guy that had made her blush deeply.

She thought back to those startling aqua eyes that he had, they were impossibly bright. Such a stark contrast to the darkness that she was so used to seeing. He wore his brown hair shaggy and just slightly dropping seductively into his eyes. She liked that he didn't spend time primping himself, making himself look perfect but rather knew that he already was perfect just as he was. It took a certain amount of confidence to look that way and to have such a lopsided, sexy smile that he was clearly well aware worked wonders on women.

Hell, she hadn't been interested in dating in years, having been taught that there were more important things in the world, but Alex had gotten her mind churning, hoping to see him each morning. It had gotten so bad that Raven had taken to watching the door as every customer passed through it, wondering if he was ever going to walk back in.

She had a feeling he would.

But if one of those days it was him, she didn't know what she'd do other than blush at his charm and the way his eyes searched hers, as if he could see right through her. If he could though, she knew he wouldn't like what he saw. She didn't like what she saw when she looked at her own self in the mirror, but what choice did she have?

This was the life she'd been given, there was nothing that could change that.