Healing Together

Chapter 5: Truth

Monday morning.

“Literally all you’ve been talking about is Sen.”, Joyce began babbling on just like always.

“No, I have not.”, I said in my defense.

She turned to me and c****d a brow as if she were surprised, “Are you actually serious or are you just playing dumb?”

“Joyce, why can’t we just walk to school without arguing?”, I responded.

She rolled her eyes, “Honey, I’m not even trying to argue, I’m just genuinely concerned... you really don’t think that you’ve been constantly talking about Sen?”

“Nope.”, I said while holding my head high.

“You can’t be serious, Meg.”, Joyce said.

I crossed my arms, “Fine, you’re right! I can’t help it though. I like him... a lot. Maybe too much. I don’t know.”

Joyce smiled, “And there’s nothing wrong with that, girl! I’m so happy for you. Have you guys made it official yet?”

I stopped walking and stood still. Somehow, it had just crossed my mind that we weren’t actually official. We didn’t have a title. He didn’t ask for me to be his girlfriend and I didn’t ask for him to be my boyfriend. Although, he has insinuated that he wanted a future with me. But still, I wasn’t sure what that made us in the meantime.

Joyce put her hand on my shoulder, “Are you okay?”

“Oh. Yeah, yeah... I’m perfectly fine.”, I said.

“Okay, so come on, we gotta get to school.”, she responded.

I nodded and continued walking.

Once Joyce and I finally made it to our school, we both went to my locker. We were actually there five minutes before first period started, which was very rare for us. We’d usually show up seconds before the bell rings.

~After fist period~

“Come with me to my locker, I have way too many books in my backpack. My back hurts.”, Joyce said.

I nodded and began walking with her to her locker before hearing a deep voice come from behind us.

“Hey, Joyce... looking good.”

Joyce and I both stopped in our tracks. Before turning around, Joyce looked as if her soul had left her body. “Megan, Is that... is th-“. . .

Before she could finish sentence, she had already been spun around and held...

Her eyes lit up from excitement, “It is you! It really is you, Chris!”

Chris was Joyce’s boyfriend... well, ex boyfriend. He had went off to college since he graduated last year. I was confident that the both of us were confused as to what he was doing back in Pittsburgh, inside of the high school at that.

I watched Joyce’s excitement increase the longer she looked at him. I was nothing but happy for her. When she found out Chris was going to college in California, she was completely heartbroken because she knew that she’ll never be able to see him. They were literally across the country from one another.

I personally felt like Chris’ decision was a little selfish. But then again, I didn’t... because I knew that going to a University in California has always been his dream. I just hated that I had to see my best friend so heartbroken over the summer break before senior year started. With that being said, I was very happy to see Joyce reunited with Chris again... but him being back gives him another chance to hurt her again. I didn’t want that to happen.

“Why are you here?”, Joyce asked Chris.

“Well, um... it kinda just wasn’t for me.”, he responded.

She made a screwed facial expression, “What wasn’t for you? Cali or college?”

Chris began scratching his head and constantly breaking eye contact as if he were embarrassed, “Uhh... kinda... both.”

“What?!”

After hearing that, I’ve had enough. I tried understanding where he was coming from but all that I could think about was how he left Joyce completely broken. He left her broken, sad and depressed, to the point where she couldn’t get over him. Now that she finally did get over him, he comes back. He came back with a fresh chance to break her heart again. Not that that were his intentions, but I just hated the thought of it.

“Joyce, I’m gonna head to class. I’ll give you two your privacy... nice seeing you, Chris.” I said while interrupting their conversation.

“Nice to see you too, Megan.”, he responded with a smile.

I turned around, rolled my eyes and began walking.

Megan, it’s okay. Joyce is happy. Joyce is happy. That is all that should matter.

I walked into my second period classroom and sat down at my desk. Holding my head down, I began doodling inside my notebook while waiting for class to begin. While still looking down, I saw black shoes standing in front of my desk and I felt someone looking down at me. I felt my space being violated so I lifted my head up to see who it could be.

It was Sen.

He smiled, “Hey mama. Forgot I had second period with you?”

I smiled back, “Well, to be honest, yes. I haven’t seen you in school in a while.”

“I’m back. You don’t have to miss me anymore.”, he said before making his way to his seat.

Just like on his first day here, he sat behind me.

Seconds after the bell rang for second period to start, Joyce walked in and took a seat. She gave me a look that confused me; I couldn’t figure out what she was trying to tell me. I couldn’t tell whether she was happy or not. Her disposition looked as if she were sad, mad, and somewhat happy all in one. I made sure to keep my eye on her throughout the class period. Chris just came back and he was already causing her to act like this.

Trying to pay attention in class, I felt my phone vibrate on my desk. I tried to check my phone as discretely as possible because Mrs. Morgan hated when her students would use their phones. After checking my phone, I noticed that I got a text from Sen. It read:

what’s wrong with your friend?

I laughed to myself and looked behind me to see Sen smiling. He then mouthed the words “text me back”. So I did. Well, at least I tried.

“Miss. Sefir, are you on your phone?”, Mrs. Morgan asked.

I felt everyone’s faces on me but I wasn’t at all embarrassed for some reason, “Um, I apologize Mrs, Morgan.”

She shook her head no, “Please exit the classroom, Megan.”

I picked up my things and did as she said. There was only ten minuets left of class anyway, so I didn’t stress it. After exiting the classroom, I texted Sen.

Me: See what you did? You got me in trouble.

Sen: lol I thought you‘d know how to pull it off.

Me: Whatever. That woman already has a personal vendetta against me anyways.

Sen: why do you say that?

Me: Trust me lol. I just know she does. You better stop texting me before she catches you and kicks you out of class too.

Sen: nah I’m a pro.

I chuckled to myself and started walking. I thought about Joyce and how she could be feeling at the moment. I felt bad. Not because Chris came back but because she had a lot to think about. I just wanted to be there for her.

“Wait up!”, Sen said while walking behind me.

I turned around and laughed when I saw him, “I thought you were a pro, what happened?”

“Hahaha”, he said sarcastically. “Nothing is funny because unlike you, I got kicked out on purpose.”

“What do you mean?”, I asked while rolling my eyes.

“I’m saying that I purposely made sure that she saw me on my phone, so that I could be with you. I didn’t want you to be lonely. Also, it was kinda my fault.”, he explained.

I hugged him and looked up, “I missed you.”

“I missed you too, mama.”, he responded before kissing me on my forehead.

I smiled, “I’m glad you’re back in school.”

“I know you are. I am too.”, he said.

We continued walking around, waiting for the bell to ring for class to end. I was surprised we weren’t stopped by a hall monitor since we both didn’t have a hall pass. But I was just happy to be with him.

~After school~

Joyce and I were on our way home. I wasn’t sure if I should ask her about Chris and how she felt about everything. I didn’t know if she would want to talk about it, but I asked anyway... just to see.

“So how are you feeling about Chris coming back?”

She rolled her eyes, “I feel like it’s some bullshit. I’m not gonna lie though, when I saw him I was so happy. It’s like all of my feelings for him got released and are no longer bottled in. But then I got mad at him because how come he was so sure about leaving for college and now all of a sudden he just feels like college wasn’t for him?”

Although that was exactly what I was thinking, I couldn’t say that. I wanted to make her feel better.

“Maybe he was very sure and then after his experience, he just realized that he didn’t like it. I’m sure he didn’t want to hurt you, Joyce.”

She looked at me and smiled, “You’re right.”

“Are you Alright? Do you want me to come over.”, I asked her.

“No, it’s fine Megan. I’ll be okay.”, she responded.

We arrived in front of Joyce’s house and hugged each other. She smiled at me but I could see a tad bit of sadnesses in her eyes... but Joyce is the kind to tell me her feelings over the phone so I knew I could just call her.

I continued walking and as I turned the corner, I felt a shoulder wrap around me. Without stopping or looking up, I said “Hi Sen.”

“You’re already that familiar with my touch? Damn.”, he said while letting out a laugh.

I actually was. I just knew that it was Sen because the way he touches me is so gentle. The energy that my body picks up whenever he touches me, is unreal. I could never mistake his touch for someone else’s.

“Yes, I am. You should be flattered.”

“Trust me, I am. If my arm leaves that much of a spell on you, I wonder what my lips do.”, he confidently said.

I laughed, “Oh your lips does wonders. No doubt about that.”

“Come to my house and they can do more wonders.”, he quickly responded.

He was so aware of how he made me feel and whenever he bragged about it, it made me even more attracted to him. His confidence was so admirable. I loved that he knew how to separate his confidence with his romantic, charismatic side.

“I would love to but I can’t.”

“Why not, love?”, he asked.

I looked at him, “I have to study for calculus. Plus, your mother is sick and I don’t want to be in her home without her knowing I am there. I’ve done it once and I felt like it was disrespectful.”

“I love how much respect you have for my moms, Megan... I’ll tell her you’re coming. I want you to feel respected too and not like a secret.”, Sen explained.

I smiled, “I really do appreciate that but I’m still gonna have to pass.”

“I can help you study. I took calculus last year and I’m not bragging at all but it was my strong suit. Whatever I can do to spend time with you, I’ll do it.”, he said.

Hmm... I didn’t really think of Sen as much of a math guy but that is what I get for assuming, I guess.

“I’ll go.”

He smiled and immediately called his mom. “Hello?. . . Hey ma, how you feeling?. . . Good, good. Uh, I just wanted to ask if Megan could come over? I’m helping her study calc. . . Yeah? Okay, ma. I’ll see you. . . I love you too. Bye.”

“She said she was okay with it and she likes you, now come on.”, he said.

We arrived at his house, I watched him unlock the door, and we walked in to see his mom lying down on the couch.

“Hello, thank you for allowing me in your home”, I said to Sen’s mom.

She looked at me and smiled, “No problem, sweetie. Such a nice girl.”

“Alright ma, we’ll be upstairs. You need anything?”, Sen asked his mom.

“No, I’m okay baby.”, she answered.

We headed upstairs and walked into his room. I took my backpack off, placed it down at the end of his bed, and sat down. He then sat next to me.

“I’ll take out your notes, which notebook is it?”, he asked before reaching into my bag.

“The yellow one. Take out the yellow folder as well, please.”, I said.

Sen nodded and took both of them out of my bag. He then handed them to me, “Show me what you need to study.”

I began flipping through the pages of my notebook while I felt his eyes on me the whole time. He then took the notebook out of my hand, placed it on his bed and kissed me.

“I’m sorry, you just look so good.”, he said.

I smiled at his compliment and leaned in to kiss him again, “You don’t have to apologize, I as waiting for that.”

In the middle of our kiss, Sen did something completely unexpected and started tickling me. Because I was extremely ticklish, I began laughing hysterically and even kicking my feet... which was actually very embarrassing. But Sen found it funny.

Sen began laughing the hardest I’ve seen him laugh, “You’re so funny. How are you that ticklish?”

“Why would you even- I hate you!”, I responded while laughing with him.

I picked up his pillow and hit him across his forearm with it.

He laughed, “You don’t know what you just got yourself into.”

Sen picked up another pillow and we began having a pillow fight. Everything was going so perfectly; we were having so much fun. Although I should’ve been studying, Sen and I were in our own world.

I sat up on the bed, “Okay, let’s start stu-“

Sen cut me off by hitting me with the pillow again, I ended up losing my balance and fell off the bed. We both started laughing again.

Sen reached his hand down to me from on top of the bed, “Here, take my hand, clumsy.”

While still lying on the floor, I looked under his bed... I saw a whole bunch of medication under there. There were actually three boxes full of some sort of pills. I looked up at Sen, held out my hand and let him pull me back up.

“Come on, we should study now.”, he said after leaning in for a kiss.

I can’t be quiet anymore. I need to know what’s going on with him.

I pushed his face away and stared at him angrily.

Sen shot me a curious glance, “Whoa, what’s wrong?”

“Do you mind telling me what that is under your bed, Sen?”

His facial expression changed and he looked as if he had lost his best friend. I looked back at him, waiting for an answer.

I became impatient, “Well? Are you going to tell me?”

“M-Megan, I-“, he tried getting his words out.

He’s stuttering... I’ve never heard him stutter before.

“Sen... you’ve been hiding this from me, haven’t you?”, I asked.

He dropped his head down low, “Megan, I didn’t want to lose you. I kinda knew that I would have to tell you eventually but I didn’t want it to be this soon.”

“Tell me what?”

“Those are pills. I’m selling them... illegally.”, he answered.

I looked at him and lifted his head up so that he could look at me, “Why, Sen? Why are you doing that?”

His eyes began to water, “Because I have to, Meg!”. He raised his voice a little, “I had no choice. I still have no choice. He was threatening my family, I’m almost there. I’ll be done with it in no time. I just want him out of our lives; I just want him gone!”.

Sen started breaking down in tears.

I grabbed him and held his head close to my chest, “I’m so sorry this is happening to you. I really am... you’re gonna be okay, your mom is gonna be okay. Im sure of it... shhh, it’s okay.”

Sen broke away from my arms, “No. No! It’s not gonna be okay! I tried convincing myself that but it’s not! You weren’t supposed to find out. I didn’t want you to think of me as some kind of drug dealer; that’s not what I am! ... please just go, Megan. Just go.”

I stood up and stepped back to get a better look of him, “Do you really want me to leave, Sen? I think you need someone right now... I-“

“I don’t need anyone, okay? I never needed anyone, Megan. I was always on my own. I did everything for myself and my mom, I never really had a childhood. I was always an adult because I was forced to be one. You don’t have to sit here and feel sorry for me, just leave.”, he said while wiping his tears.

I walked up to him and stood directly in front of him, “Just call me or text me whenever you need to. I’m here for you.”

I kissed him on the forehead, gathered my things and started walking out of his room.

“Megan, wait...”, he called.

I stopped in my tracks and turned around, “Yes?”

“I’m sorry, I was just afraid to lose you. Please forgive me, I didn’t mean to be rude.”, he explained.

I smiled a little, “Apology accepted.”

Although it is terrible what is happening to Sen, I’m not completely sure how to feel about it... I just have a lot of thinking to do.

Sen’s POV

She was gone... I was left alone thinking about how she’s taken it. I wondered if she was still going to associate with me. I wondered if she was scared of me. I just didn’t know what to do.

*phone rings*

“Hello?”

“Need the money by 5/5. That means May 5th, Incase you’re stupid. It’s May 1st. You better have it or else.”

I balled my fist with anger, “Or else what?”

He laughed, “You'll see... We have your little girlfriend with us right now.”