Moon Kissed

chapter 9

*Nicole's POV*

I sat on the bed watching TV with him nearby. I could feel his eyes on me almost constantly. I wanted to be closer to him but I fought the urge and focused on the TV. Without thinking I scooted a bit closer to him and I could feel his warmth. It was so comforting just having him close by. I felt ridiculous asking him to stay but I didn't want to be alone right now. His warmth eased my mind and my muscles. I wanted to surround myself with his warmth. I tried to focus on the TV but all I could feel was his eyes on me and I felt myself growing more and more uneasy.

I let myself focus on anything but his eyes. Soon his warmth had seeped deeper into my mind and I felt myself drifting off to sleep. I was consumed by the darkness for a while before I felt the ground give out from under me. I watched as I fell and landed hard on a cold floor. It was like looking through a smoke screen. Everything blurred and I heard the same voices that tormented me for years.

“Come on Nikki…”

I cried and tried to back away as I saw a sickly hand reach towards me.

“Nikki, Don't lie… You like this.”

I cried more as the men I hated grabbed me and pinned me down.

I wanted to scream but was quickly silenced by their hands as they covered my body and held me down. All I could see was their sickly grins as they tormented and touched me.

“Hey! Nicole.. Wake up Nicole”

This was a new voice. I didn't recognize this one.

“Nicole! You're alright! Wake up Princess.”

I squirmed to get away but felt something warm envelope me.

I wanted to get away from here! I needed to escape! But this voice is calming me down a bit.

I cried some more until I felt a warm zapping feeling on my face. My eyes jolted open at the sensation. I looked around frantically with tears staining my face. My eyes landed on a pair of striking blue gray eyes. My nose filled with an intoxicating scent. And I felt myself being held by large muscular arms. I didn't know what to do but the moment his hands held my face and I saw the raw emotion in his eyes I lost it. The sobs came rolling out and I could not stop the fear and sadness that escaped me again and again. We didn't say anything for awhile but he sat holding me to him, shushing me gently as I cried onto his shoulder.

“Nicole…” His voice came out hesitant and concerned.

I looked up and sniffled.

“Please… What is happening…”

I shook my head as more tears filled my eyes.

I couldn't tell him. I couldn't.

I heard him sigh deeply and look down. I knew he couldn't understand why I wasn't talking to him but I knew he wouldn't understand what I had to say either and I couldn't risk being hurt again.

I shook my head profusely and closed my eyes tight. I felt his arms lace around me and hold me into his chest. His head buried into my neck and hair. I felt him breathe in and stay that way for a long time. I inhaled his scent and let myself calm down from the nightmare that haunted me.

I felt my wolf distant in my mind whining. I knew that she was torn. This man was apparently my mate but to protect her and myself we couldn't accept him. Although I will admit I was very confused as to why, if he is my mate, hasn't he called me out or tried to mark me?

Maybe he isn't my mate. Who knows. My heart ached at the thought of him not being my mate. I couldn't let myself get consumed by the bond. He couldnt be my mate nor I his.

“I'm sorry..” I muttered into his shoulder.

He pulled back and looked me in the eyes.

“Nicole I’m sorry but I can’t help you if you won’t let me in. Please let me in. I need to know what is happening”

His words hit me hard and I wanted to break down again. I took a deep breath and kept my eyes down for a while. I closed my eyes before I nodded. I didn’t plan to tell him everything but I would answer some questions to keep him off my back a bit.

I opened my eyes to see him staring at me with a bit of shock on his face- clearly not expecting me to agree to this. I knew this was not going to be easy but maybe some peace of mind will come from this.

He sat up and moved me off his lap and grabbed a glass of water from the nightstand. After handing it to me he sat down next to me and took a deep breath.