her sweet chains

Episode 5

4 months later

As I’d predicted learning to suppress my shifts wasn’t easy. Now I had shifted twice the shifts seemed in a rush to occur and I felt shifts beginning several times a day. According to Dean it was due to my wild female hormones. I soon found that when my body began shifting it didn’t appreciate being interrupted. I did manage it occasionally by trying to get a grip on my emotions but I wasn’t very good at this being used to giving my emotions as much freedom to range as they wanted. While my control was proving difficult initiation was proving to be impossible. I was being given lessons daily which soon were all taken over by Darius, as I was rather emotional and being given an activity that I couldn’t do led to me having several tantrums and hence activity involving trying to initiate a shift turned into a lesson on suppressing one. Darius soon took over after a few incidents with my other would be teachers, including Derek who I accidentally knocked out when I whacked him around the head with a rather large tree branch fracturing his skull. Something the other boys found hilarious but unsurprisingly Darius didn’t.

           Derek hadn’t tried to kiss me since my birthday but I often saw him looking at me intently those golden flecks dancing across his irises a far away look in his eyes as if he was reminiscing about it. He had tried to mention it bless him, but every time he tried I either glared so intently he didn’t dare, walked away or punched him in the nose, all seemed equally effective . I knew it wasn’t the ideal way to be dealing with the issue but I didn’t want to deal with the issue and anyway I was still angry with him! We had been best friends for as long as I could remember and he was the one trying to screw it up. He was the one who wanted things to change and I found it exhausting trying to constantly beat him of not to mention the fact that I cared so much for him that constantly being a b***h and spurring his very sweet advances hurt so I didn’t want to constantly do it. But whatever it was it cost us our friendship and whatever he felt I didn’t and I couldn’t deal with it.  so I dealt with it the way my very short sighted emotions deemed best, the only response I ever do use- I ignored it. But despite our complete lack of intimacy everyone had still concluded that we were paired up, or would be as soon as I decided to stop playing hard to get and simply confirmed it to them all. I glared, growled and snapped at anybody who suggested this and I ensured I was NEVER alone with Derek any more and I was never affectionate towards him (like I was with the other boys as nobody saw that level of affection as odd) and because Derek was Derek he let me do this, like all the others he was one to let me get my own way. Anyway he seemed perfectly content to wait me out it was if we were playing a subtle game trying to outwit the other just because we both were desperate to win. Yet the rest of the pack didn’t seem to understand that we hadn’t mated as far as they were all concerned Derek was my mate and all the growling and glaring in the world wouldn’t convince them otherwise. I mean it is true that our err… encounter was rather more significant for us than it would have been for humans. Wolves are by nature very faithful our mates are more important than anything especially for the males their females’ lives are always placed above their own. And once we pair up with our mates from that point on there is no one else. It just doesn’t happen. Especially not for flippant casual s*x, so the fact that I was eighteen and still a virgin was not unexpected, as everyone believed I had my mate so once we started having s*x that would be it, just Derek for the rest of my life. Derek and Jamie were also err shall I say naïve to the lure of human erm interactions. Well I think Derek was . I knew if I actually asked him he would tell me but I just couldn’t bear to as I knew that would produce a very self satisfied sort of smile on his face.Dean wasn’t so naïve he was a slut. he seemed to decide on a most unique method of finding his mate, that is he decided the way to find his mate was to sleep with every woman he encountered just once (or twice)and hence if he found his mate he would soon know. But even a loveable slut like Dean would be more than happy to settle down, more than anything he wanted to find his mate and if he did I know he would treat her like a princess and would be faithful for the rest of his natural life. of the other two both my boys had followed the traditional that is Dean type route initially. then Rogers mate had died they had attempted to turn her just over a year ago (its unusual but does happen as sometimes the body rejects the change).the memory still haunted him his eyes had never lost the pain they constantly reflected his pain in the way his irises always contained flecks of gold. This had probably had something to do with why he then began to distance himself from the pack, he had worked outside the pack as a mechanic but after this death he had moved out of the Den and though he was with us for the large part of his free time he had been granted permission to live away from the pack in the nearby town. Carl similarly had believed he had found his mate in a human yet his heart broken by this callous women who I subsequently tracked down and broke her arm. It honestly was accidental but I didn’t regret it. I regretted the amount of trouble I got into for it. But not the action it’s drummed into us from birth

‘We are the pack. Protect the pack defend your brothers. If a brother is wounded the pack is wounded. If our brother is harmed the pack will seek blood, if our brother is harmed the pack will kill.’ So it seemed logical to me she broke Carls heart so I broke her arm.  But it wasn’t unusual for hearts of our brothers to get broken there are so few of us and humans are lot less faithful most relationships ended because the human left which was one of the reasons we didn’t like to date humans. So many of my boys would seem like sluts because they would sleep with women but not date them, unless they believed that they had met their mates. Still Deans attempt to sleep with the entire female population was still a little extreme. But if you did date and fall in love with a human there were two options live with it- often though this led to the human leaving it also made long-term issues (as we age very slowly once we reach our controlled level) also it can be awkward living with the pack and not being one of them. It can and has been done but it’s tricky. The other option is to turn them, they have to consent of course and it can lead to rejection if they turn out not to be your mate and of course it’s a strong leap of faith. But again its been done Katie (Geoff’s mate) and Connie (Andrews mate) were both former humans who had given it up allowed them to be turned for the one they loved and for them it seemed to work. Anyway my situation with Derek’s persistent well whatever game playing he was employing was even more infuriating due to my activity status that is I wasn’t permitted any. Four months after my first shift I still hadn’t mastered my control. The summer had come to an end but thankfully I hadn’t obtained control as that meant in the eyes of the pack I wasn’t an adult and hence was still permitted a certain amount of leeway when it came to making decisions and thinking of my future, which to me was a relief as I wasn’t ready I didn’t want to even consider the future. We each have to obtain a career to help the pack in some way. When we are young of course we attend school learning to live and disappear among humans is essential if we are to survive and after all we aren’t really completely separate from them, so we attend school. The only issue this tends to produce is we don’t tend to mix well, we go to class, we study and we talk to no one unless asked a question which we answer with as few words as possible. Then when we leave class we hang out with our pack. It’s probably the reason I’ve never developed the ability to be a girly girl I never had any girls to mix with, so all I know is what I learnt from my brothers and as you can imagine that doesn’t include much about high heels and lip-gloss or whatever it is girls talk about. In secondary school the fact that I hung out with my boys did make me a sort of bizarre friendship target for many of the ‘popular girls’. I seemed to be perceived as providing some sort of doorway to my boys; especially as their conventional simpering smiles got NO response. The boys they didn’t like to be pursued especially at that age, they just never got it! Too bad for them as by this stage many had obtained control of their shifts or had at least begun to show the physical signs that the shifts were impending, this gives them a look of pure raw power barely held in check behind a perfectly polite exterior. Their chizzled bodies strong arms and dark eyes that held those beautiful flecks of gold, and of course this combined with their complete respect for women my boys were the kind that were brought up to open doors pull out chairs and even stand when an unfamiliar women entered the room. Combined with their distant nature made them the dark brooding mysterious and of course gorgeous all the girls wanted.  Of course for a girl being different isn’t a good thing at school but I was okay being very strong and having several brothers who had liked to wrestle as children meant that I wouldn’t allow myself to be beaten up and name calling never bothered me that much, and when they did start to grate it only took a broken wrist and a fractured collarbone to make my point and since then the names had reduced to a series of quiet mutters which I could deal with. Our families were a source of curiosity  in the town many believing we were some sort of weird cult with so many of us living such secluded lives, so few of us working publicly in the town and of course the weird kids who were never seen anywhere alone and sometimes disappeared completely for months at a time. Of course this was necessary when we began to shift it usually required taking time out of school and repeating the year. But anyway once we do finish school its like for anyone else – Career. It takes a lot to keep the pack together so we all need to play our part so its not job its career we have to become someone whose good for the pack (not necessarily by providing money the pack owned most of the property of that town so money wasn’t a problem). Like Kate – a doctor she doesn’t practice anymore but we do all like to get ourselves into enough situations to keep her busy. Or Darius is a writer may not sound useful but it pays well and allows him to be a hermit without anybody thinking it strange. If you won’t choose a career it’s assumed you will become an enforcer which is what Derek, Carl, Pete (their dad) Dean and Geoff all did, seeking out rogues who trespassed on pack land and ‘dealing’ with them as well as ensuring our existence was as unnoticed as possible. Of course as a girl and Darius’ only child this wouldn’t have been a popular choice so I had to pick a career. Although the guys did keep suggesting a third option that is – expanding the pack! But I wasn’t about to start breeding a new generation no matter how eager the guys were to assist me with this course, but thankfully my lack of control gave me a temporary reprieve from having to make this choice. To be honest my shifts were perfectly timed beginning a week after taking my final A level exam so I wouldn’t have to repeat anything but still after four months of being confined to the grounds I was starting to twitch desperate for something to do. As an idea it was a teens dream but in reality it sucked, I was just so bored especially as I couldn’t rely on Derek to distract me. since the birthday incident things had been difficult well not for him as everything as far as he was concerned was going as he planned but for me it was all wrong so I’d been desperate to avoid being with him alone for too long .

           So I was BORED! And twitchy I couldn’t seem to distract myself properly by ANYTHING, not for long anyway. I’d read for three pages and get bored, I’ll play half a tune on the piano and stomp off with a growl, I’d flick through all the TV channels which filed up about two minutes of my day, I’d eat that was effective but even a wolf cant eat forever. In between these activities I’d just stomp from room to room noisily, walking in a room just to see if anything interesting was happening there, only to stomp out slamming the door when nothing happened to whisk me off my feet. Whenever I did spend more than a few minutes in a room I found myself striding from wall to wall like a cadged animal. Occasionally I went for a run that seemed to be the most effective thing as wolf or not I had always found running good for diverting my mind as it gave a sort of clarity when all you had to focus on was the pounding of your feet on the ground, the pumping of your arms the deepening of your breath. But none of these things worked forever.

“You’re going to wear a groove in the floor.” Dean said vaguely looking up from his magazine, as I paced up and down on the floor of the Lounge hands twitching desperate for some sort of relief. Dean shrugged and returned to his magazine flipping the glossy pages absently though his eyes kept flicking above the pages watching my progression as though amused by it. “Feeling a little lonesome?” Dean asked vaguely though his eyes were amused yet still intense as ever, I turned to him as a growl bubbled up from my throat, Dean simply raised an eyebrow, but his meaning had struck home- Derek wasn’t here. For the past week Derek, Pete Carl and Geoff had all been out hunting down a rogue who had felt a need to trespass into our territory, Dean was the only enforcer left behind as he had broken his femur a week ago when he fell of his motorbike. Although he didn’t seem to think a broken leg was sufficient reason to stay behind. This made me and Dean good or awful company for each other as both of us were simply frantic to be somewhere anywhere else. But whereas my restlessness caused me to be angry it made Dean playful not a good combination, especially as my restlessness had become more and more sever over the past week making Dean’s playfulness even more trying on my nerves. “You shouldn’t be lonely.” Dean said sweetly “he’s only been gone four days.”

“Five.” I snapped before I could help myself. Dean smiled to himself as he continued flipping pages casually, I walked over to the desk and very noisily pulled out the chair and flopped myself down to continue on with Jamie’s essay which I had been writing for him through sheer boredom on my part and indifference on Jamie’s.

“My apologies.” Dean said genteelly “five days and after all you still have the love bites he gave you to remember him by.” Anger and humiliation flared through me in equal measure and I knew my eyes were wide I spun round to face him growling,

“Did Derek tell you about that?” I growled annoyed realizing a second too late that this was completely the wrong response as I now had no chance of denying it now. Especially as I realised I had also instinctively clamped one hand to my neck and another was slung across my waist instinctively shielding the bites that Derek had inflicted the day before he had left. The boys of the pack being wolves we liked physical closeness and no not in a kinky sort of way. So The boys liked to watch films once a week  we had a film night in the enforcers house ( where Derek, Carl, Jamie and Deal all lived together) we all laid out on curled up with each other on a mixture of the big cushions and beanbags that littered their living room as we all half watched a film. This defiantly was just a comfort thing as I had been permitted there since before my shifts but it had simply become more comfortable since I became one of them, as this showed them proved that I was there simply as I was one of them. I lay there on the fig Orange ‘fat boy’ beanbag with Carl. I was in one of Derek’s T-shirts which I had been wearing to sleep in for as long as I could remember. I loved them as they were warm soft and smelled good, they also came down to almost my knees meaning I didn’t have to wear anything else  except my panties which made this outfit unbelievably comfortable. We were all together lying curled up together I had Jamie’s arm carelessly slung around my waist as I had my head resting on Carls hip as my feet constantly twitched around trying to evade Derek’s fingers as he constantly gently ticked at my soles. The others had all fallen asleep during the film some awful contrived tripe that Carl had picked off pay per view. Me and Derek seemed to be the only two still awake, as the others had fallen asleep. clearly annoyed at being relegated with me choosing to lie on the Carl’s beanbag, Derek taken to tickling my feet, which was probably the only reason I was still awake .I looked over at the screen as the two main characters whose names I dint know or care to know kissed in what was clearly meant to be some sort of emotionally charged finale. I clumsily wiggled out of the reach of my boy’s grasp twisting around and sliding over towards Derek’s arms settling myself down on his chest. Running my fingers gently across the taut muscles of his chest.

“This film sucked.” I said as the credits began to trawl up the screen. Derek just murmured a general sort of assent, “I think we should ban Carl from being permitted to choose.”

“The films not important.” Derek said placidly,

“Then what is the point of film night.”

“This.” Derek said pulling me closer “just being together.” He muttered rubbing his nose in my hair, “all of us. That’s what we like.”

“You like this.” I said flirtatiously tugging gently on Derek’s shirt with my teeth. His hands slid slowly up my back,

“You know I do.” He said softly into my neck, before suddenly growling as his roving hands had realised I wasn’t wearing a bra. for some reason his little growl affected me I couldn’t stop myself smiling flirtatiously I lifted myself out of his arms straddling across him but keeping my upper body away from his smiling in flirtation. Derek growled as he reached his hands up placing his hands on either side of my waist and then to my surprise began sliding them up though this time his hands were under my T-shirt. “Stop that.” I muttered half-heartedly shifting around in his grasp.

“Alright.” He said pulling his hands out too simply grab my neck and with too much force pulled my face too his fusing our lips together. I didn’t resist except to growl and nibble playfully on his lower lip. Derek’s hands slid back down to my waist again gripping firmly and yanking at my giant T-shirt trying clumsily to undress me without ceasing in his kisses. Derek growled and tore his lips away from mine in a second he had pulled the fabric swiftly over my head and flinging it aside. His hands began sliding around again as his lips locked on my throat kissing a path down it. He growled as if in pure pleasure as he nuzzled into the junction between my neck and shoulder. I cried out in pain as he bit down hard onto my shoulder. Derek suddenly shifted his hands and used this to flip me over I giggled as I somehow ended up underneath him the beanbag tickling my naked back. Derek returned to my lips for a few more moments before his lips slid again down my throat and across my breast.

“Derek.” I whispered. He groaned but ignored me, “not here.” I hissed he growled again and bit harshly into my stomach. “Put your teeth away.” I hissed again jumping as I heard Carl groan in his sleep and roll over. I squeaked jumping up causing Derek to tumble back from me and landing with a sort of thump on the floor. In an instant again fully dressed I settled myself back amongst the boys ignoring my last view of Derek who was glaring intently.

“Of course Derek didn’t say anything.” Dean said from just behind me making me jump as I’d been so involved in my daydream I had forgotten about him. “He is much too much of a gentleman for that. Its just you too are very involved with each other and erm…” he said making a brave attempt at trying to look awkward “you forget to be discrete we were all there after all and though we may have been asleep, we have very sensitive hearing.”

“You woke up.” I whispered in horror

“Not just me” he said smiling.

“You were all awake.”

“Yep.”

“Why didn’t you say something?” I growled through gritted teeth, Dean lifted his eyebrows as he continued to peer over the top of his magazine with a vague sort of interest.

“What would you have liked us to say?” he asked vaguely I glared at him intensely until I heard a loud snap and vaguely realised I had snapped the pencil I was holding. Dean just smiled and returned to his magazine. I lifted my glass and peering into my glass of juice as if expecting to find some answers in there. “I’m sure we would have said something if Derek had managed to get your panties off.” Dean said lightly “but he hasn’t has he not get anyway.” I slammed my glass down on the desk so hard it completely shattered washing orange juice all over the oak wood top. Dean looked up above the magazine again with a vague sort of interest.

“What has Derek been telling you?” I growled, Dean smiled

“Honestly Darling nothing. You just are very into each other at times.” he said slowly “you seem to forget there are sometimes others in the house. We have very sensitive hearing the walls aren’t lead lined, and to be honest in the very early hours of your birthday you two weren’t bothering to keep your voices down.” I turned away furious with myself  and clenched my fist, wincing a second later as the broken glass shards I was holding dug into my palm causing blood to drip down my hand. I gritted my teeth as I pulled the shards of glass from my palm before sweeping the pieces into my uninjured palm and dumping them in a nearby wastepaper basket before mopping up the Juice with a tissue while Dean regarded me and his magazine with pretty much equally divided attention. I pulled Jamie’s essay back towards me and focused on the page in front of me deliberately ignoring Dean.

“Its eighteen.” he whispered in my ear making me jump I had been so intent on ignoring him he’d been very effective at sneaking up on me.

“What?” I asked vaguely.

“Eighteen.” Dean said leaning my shoulder tapping the paper lightly. “I thought I’d help.” He said resting his chin on my shoulder “you looked stuck you’ve been staring blankly at that page for three quarters of an hour.”

“You have nothing better to do with your time than watch me read.” I said plainly still irritated at him.

“Not right now” he admitted before walking back flopping himself back down on the sofa. “You could distract me if you want.” he said vaguely I looked over “want to make out?” he asked with a flirty smile.

“Not right now but thank you for the offer.”

“Well if you change your mind I am always here for you.” He said again flashing that beautiful smile at me. If any of my boys could be described as drop dead gorgeous it was Dean when he chose to use that beautiful smile he could stop the heart of every girl in a four mile radius.

“Well thank you that’s good to know.” I said turning back to the desk, “I knew that was the answer by the way.” I said irritatedly scribbling the number on the jotter in front of me.

“Oh I know that darling.” He said softly “because Derek being here has clearly not affected you. Your not distracted. So you are of course well aware that you are not studying math you are writing a 2,000 essay for Jamie’s English lit homework on Macbeth so obviously you know the answer is eighteen .” Dean said smiling flirtatiously as he grabbed an apple ripping a large chunk out with his teeth.

“You’re a jerk.” I said flinging down my pencil irritably. Dean chuckled,

“And you’re missing Derek.” He said playfully “come on you can confess I won’t tell anyone.”

“I’m going for a walk.” I snapped pushing myself up and striding away quickly before Dean noticed the twitching that had begun in my legs. I instinctively pulled off the silver necklace from Derek and shoved it in my pocket. I strode quickly from the house and out onto the back lawn standing completely still for a moment breathing the clean cool hair slowly for a few moments hoping this would calm me as it sometimes did. The air brought the familiar homely smell of the forest mingled with the damp air from a recent downpour. My legs twitched more violently, I growled and stumbled on hoping being amongst the trees might help further, but then I paused looking across at the enforcers small house looking dark and deserted. Something took over me and I directed my feet that way pushing the door open (we didn’t bother to lock our doors here ever we actually had very few functioning locks as we all possessed easily enough strength to break them anyway).I didn’t even pause in the deserted living room I didn’t spare a thought for where I was going I just rushed as my arms were beginning to tremble, as I felt my muscles shifting trying to realign themselves. I walked swiftly down the hall and shoved the door hard with my shoulder stumbling into the room slamming the door closed behind me I breathed in deeply. I wobbled slightly as I stumbled over to the bed and flung myself face down on the bed nuzzling my nose into the duvet cover breathing in Derek’s scent. I sighed contently and wriggled up slightly until my head was resting on his pillow and wrapped the duvet around myself. I began to breathe very slowly only vaguely noticing that my twitches had stopped as I fell asleep.