The Detective's Partner

Chapter 7

Elizabeth’s POV

Slamming the door, I walk a few steps before sinking to the floor. What the hell did I just do? I wanted to cry, to scream, to run away. The moment I’ve dreamed about for the past 10 years just transpired yet it couldn’t have happened at a worser time.

As much as I wanted this to happen, I didn’t think it would be like this. Not when there were other people in play. Other people who would be hurt. People that I hurt. I immediately think of Evan. He was being an ass at the moment, but that didn’t warrant this, this betrayal.

I love Evan, I truly do. He was there for me when Matthew wasn’t. He cared for me when Matthew didn’t. He loved me when Matthew didn’t. ‘But he isn’t Matthew,’ my heart told me. The tears that had threaten to fall, now running fast down my face.

‘He said he won’t leave again,’ my heart argues. ‘What if he lied? He left you before,’ my logical reasoning fought back. ‘He wouldn’t leave after we just had s*x, would he?’ ‘There’s no way you could work with him if that’s as far as the relationship will go. You know that. You’re only going to want more,’ my reasoning slamming into me like a punch to the face.

My stomach was churning. Every thought making me more nauseous. I force myself into a crouching position before hearing my phone ding. It was from Matt. I hesitate before opening it, closing my eyes in shame.

‘Liz, I’m sorry. I never intended for all of this to happen. To put you in a dreadful spot especially with Evan. But I want you to know that I don’t regret what we did. And I’m not going anywhere. I’m not leaving you again. I won’t make that choice again. -Matt’

I let out a slightly audible sob, cursing myself afterwards for doing so. I looked back at his door only a few feet away. It would be so easy to just walk away, to act like nothing happened. Leave him like he had left me.

But the thought of doing so horrified me. Never seeing Matthew again would destroy me. I stand up, my last sliver of strength pushing me back to his door. I had to talk to him, to know where we stand. I stare at it for what feels like forever before I gently knock on his door.

A few painstaking seconds go by before I start regretting my decision. I turn to leave when the door swings open. “Elizabeth. You’re back,” his face full of shock. “I never left,” I said pushing past him into the living room. I couldn’t bring myself to look at him. I knew if I did, there was no stopping my emotions.

“I… I’m so sorry Liz. I should...” his words taking me by surprise. This wasn’t his fault. It was mine. My self-control was obviously something I needed to work on.  “Don’t. I wanted that to happen as much as you did,” I interrupt.

He stares at me woefully, his body language screaming despair. “Liz,” his voice soft. The anguish in his eyes pulling mine to his. “I can’t lose you again,” I cry out, my voice breaking with each word. Sobs taking over me causing havoc.

Matthew pulls me into him, resting his chin on my head. “Oh Lizzy. You won’t. I promise. Shush. I’m here.” He says his voice wavering, yet soothing. He could be screaming or yelling, his voice would always be comforting to me.

I calm down after a few minutes, and my sobs turned into silent tears. Taking a step away from him, I quickly wipe my face. I had to of looked terrible. Rarely do I cry like that, but when I do, my face becomes covered in splotchy red marks.

I look up to Matthew and notice him smiling at me. “I know I look horrible,” I say shaking my head slightly. He c***s his head still smiling. “No, you look beautiful,” his words putting a small smile on my face. A few awkward seconds go by before he speaks.

“You came back.” He looked so relieved. “I… I’m glad you did.” “I wasn’t going to. I, uh, never made it past the hallway.” He eyes me questioningly. You could tell he was surprised by my confession. “But I couldn’t leave without finding out…”

He c***s his head, “Finding out what?” My stomach churning. This was it. “Just do it, Elizabeth,” I scream to myself. “Without finding out if you loved me, too.” My voice coming out more powerful than I thought.

I could feel his stare piercing into me. Bracing myself for his rejection, I close my eyes. Whatever the answer, I’ll get through it. I’ll get through it.

“Elizabeth, I…”