Don't. Please. Don't Make Me

Chapter One-3

She gave Sue's arm a reassuring squeeze before getting to her feet. Danny then moved off toward an adjoining table, her buttocks roving like two playful puppies. Sue smiled weakly and gathered up her purse.

She took one last look at her lovely daughter, sitting uncomfortably, it seemed, and wondered how she could possibly abandon Marcy in this place. How could she return home, relax, read or watch a program, knowing Marcy was here. Maybe against her will. Her heart broke with despair. As she watched, a young man in a red denim shirt approached the girl's table. He was clearly interested in Starr, chatting down into her upturned face and when Starr leaned toward Marcy, mouthing words, Marcy shrugged, stood and slid into another seat, allowing the young man to take her place beside Starr. In her new spot, Marcy was turned to face Sue and Sue felt her insides twist. Marcy looked directly into the darkness, right to where her mother sat huddled, and for one long horrid moment, Sue thought she had been discovered. But nothing happened. Marcy didn't cry out with indignation nor jump to her feet. She didn't race across to her mother's table and slam her fist down, demanding to know what she was doing there. Marcy just sat quietly, studying the shadows. She saw nothing. But Sue was jolted into the realization that now, there was no chance of escaping. Not without her daughter seeing her stand and move toward the exit.

Sue was forced to stay seated, right where she was, cowering behind her table. She was trapped; until such time as Marcy chose to vacate her new chair to visit the ladies' room or to take to the dance floor. Sue looked desperately to where her waitress, Danny, was coyly flirting with the customers at the next table. As the sweat broke out across Sue's shoulder blades, trickling down the indent of her spine, Danny swiveled on a spiky heel and their eyes met. Danny slipped her tray under an arm and arched a slim eyebrow in Sue's direction. Sue looked back at Marcy who was still looking intently into her eyes without seeing. Danny took a step toward Sue. God, what am I about to do?

Sue motioned weakly to Danny, picking up an imaginary glass and pressing it to her lips. “Are you sure?” Danny mouthed the words, a look of disappointment spreading behind her eyes. Sue nodded yes, and watched as Danny lifted a shoulder and turned toward the bar. God, she had done it! Made the decision and now felt sick to her stomach about it. Fighting the tremble that was incapacitating her fingers, Sue undid the top two buttons of her blouse. Marcy still watched.

Danny was at the bar now, sliding her tray across. Sue felt like she was facing a death sentence; just had a couple of minutes to go, before they threw the switch. Danny chatted with the bartender, a decent looking guy with smoky dark eyes. He laughed; said something in return. Sue pried open a third button and was aware of the cool air between the deep-V of her bra. The bartender was pouring liquor in a crystal glass; adding ice and soda. Only a minute more, Sue despaired. He put a coaster and the drink on Danny's tray, added a cocktail napkin and spoke a parting word. Danny picked up the tray and turned in Sue's direction. Oh god!

Her head rolled forward and her hands felt empty and weak. It was almost time. The inevitable couldn't be avoided. Sue took one last glance at her daughter, silently praying that she would rise from her chair and move across the room, thus allowing a moment to escape. But it wasn't happening. Marcy sat fidgeting with her drink, still staring across to where Sue hid in the darkness. It felt daunting, to be undressing in front of her own daughter.

Her time was up! As Danny approached her table, Sue slipped the last of the buttons on her blouse and eased it from her shoulders. “You sure you want to do this,” Danny gave her a weak smile and set the coaster down followed by the rum and soda. “I had him make you a double. Figured you might need it. Are you ok?”

“Not really,” Sue confessed, reaching back to unclasp her bra.

“So why, then?” Danny balanced the edge of her tray on the tablecloth, her eyes were full of concern. Maybe even pity.

“I wish I could explain,” Sue tried to form the words while pushing the straps from her shoulders; the cups dropped away and the cool air was suddenly playing tiddly-winks with her n*****s, causing them to spring up, twisting. “Just something I have to do, that's all.”

“Well for what it's worth,” Danny replied smoothly, looking down, “you're lovely.” And with that, she turned away to attend to other customers.

With Danny gone, Sue looked about, feeling abandoned. A couple of neighboring men turned casually to look, but crossing her arms along the edge of the table and sliding forward, she thwarted their view by crushing her n*****s into her forearm.

Sue checked back on Marcy. She sat listlessly, eavesdropping on Starr's conversation with the new boy. Now all Sue wanted to do was get out of the club unnoticed by her daughter; go home and cry! She took a sip of her drink and struggled not to cough it back up. God! It really was strong! She sucked in a breath. The rum fell hard on her inexperienced stomach but thankfully, seemed to steady her nerves.

The music changed, slowed, and a rush of couples crowded the dance floor. Young women, naked to the waist, threw arms about the necks of young men and swayed dreamily. Starr's new acquaintance stood, pulling her up and slowly, they moved to embrace, Starr's breasts lifting as he swung her around and around to the sensual wave of sound. Sue's heart went out to her daughter; sitting alone, neglected. Sue knew she should have been happy that some young buck hadn't moved in on Marcy, singling her out to press his advantage. But Marcy's pale solitary figure seemed so desperate. So remote. Sue wanted to rush to her. Gather her up in her arms and make her life perfect.

“Mind if I join you?”

The voice was close by Sue's ear! Made her jump!

“Wha-a-a-a?”

He laughed when he understood that he had startled her. “Sorry, ma'am,” he backed off a step, “didn't mean to frighten you.” He shrugged apologetically. “Just was wondering if you'd like some company; someone to talk to?”

“No. No I'm ok,” Sue half turned before realizing that her right breast had lifted free of her arm. To his credit, he didn't gawk. “I was just going,” she explained, readjusting her position. “Time I got back home!”

“Well just until you finish your drink, then,” he pressed. “You've got a bit left.”

In truth, Sue had most of her glass left. “Yes,” she agreed. “Still some left.”

He took that as an invitation to sit and Sue didn't have the will to argue. And he was young; almost innocent. She dimly figured she could hold her own.

“Everything alright at this table?” Danny had appeared at her elbow, dropping in like a guardian angel. It made Sue smile secretively, but it was also nice that Danny was keeping an eye on her.

“Yes... And thank you,” Sue replied, relaying a private message of gratitude with her eyes. But Danny was watching her new companion with suspicion.

“And what are you drinking, partner?” Danny's pointed remark was in reference to his red checked cowboy shirt.

“Bud Light,” was the reply, color rising along his neck.

“And another rum and soda?” she finally acknowledged Sue with a glance.

“No, this is fine,” Sue responded. “And thank you again.” Danny gave her a glimmer of understanding before turning on a heel and, skirting the dance floor, moved toward the bar.

“I don't think she likes me,” he stated under his breath as Danny retreated.

“She's ok,” Sue came to his rescue. “She's just looking out for me; that's all.”

“You're a couple?” his brow arched, astonished.

“No... no. Nothing like that. She's just... well just a good friend.” Sue felt a little pang in her heart. She had told a fib but deep down, it astounded her to realize that she wanted it to be true. She had just met Danny but already she felt they shared something important, and she wanted to count her as a friend.

“I was just wondering, that's all,” he said, defensively. Sue took a moment to study the young man who had chosen to share her table.

He was Marcy's age, maybe a year older and indeed, with his cowboy shirt, looked like a kid from the farm. His unruly hair was the color of wheat bran, his eyes clear, clear blue, and his mouth was slightly lopsided. He was all home-baked apple pie and, looking down at his hands, he nervously played with his fingers. A nice looking kid.

“So you going to introduce yourself?” Sue prodded. “I believe it's customary. At least it was in my day.”

“Oh, of course. I'm sorry.” A bit of brightness appeared in his eyes. “I'm Jeff,” and he extended a hand.

Sue froze. Common courtesy demanded that she extend her hand in return, lifting her arm from the table top where it was providing minimal but adequate concealment. To shake his hand would present him with an unobstructed view of her breasts. Their eyes locked and he read the horror there.

“Sorry,” he back peddled. “I didn't mean... it wasn't a trick or anything...”

Sue felt exasperation cloud her thinking. She wouldn't wish a “first date experience” on anyone, especially on herself, and yet here she was, all the miserable anxieties of her youth returning like stale smoke.

“Look, forget it. Ok?” Sue did a little back peddling on her own. “I'm just a little unsure of myself. This is all new to me.” She looked over at her daughter longingly, silently wishing her the strength that she, herself, seemed to be lacking.

“Bud Light!” Danny moved in, dropping a coaster in front of Sue's guest. “You be sure to call if you need anything.” She nodded to Sue, and slipped away leaving her feeling strangely forsaken. Jeff slurped the foam from the mug.

“So you like this place,” Sue made an effort.

Jeff raised his eyes above the rim of his beer mug. “Yeah, it's pretty good. Nothing else like it, actually, but it's kinda expensive. For us, I mean.”

“Us?”

“Yeah. Me an' my buddy. We have to watch our money for a few weeks; before drivin' down. But it's a nice club. And the girls...” His voice faded off.

“And the girls are nice and you get to look at them.” Sue finished his sentence for him.

“Yes, ma'am.”

She sighed. Took a sip of her rum.

“It's better than strip-clubs, ma'am,” he tried. Then halted, wondering if he was making matters worse.

“You go to strip-clubs as well?”

“Oh no ma'am. I couldn't afford both!”

His blatant honesty made Sue laugh. “So tell me, Jeff. Why did you choose to come and sit at my table?” It seemed like a fair question, considering all the younger girls that crowded the room; girls that, for him, would seem more suitable, if not more desirable.

He took a long swallow of his beer, set the mug on the coaster and pulled a sweaty palm down his face. “I thought you would be understanding, somehow. You're pretty, for sure... beautiful, really. But you seemed like someone I could talk to. Someone who would have something to say in return. Something meaningful, I mean. Someone who wouldn't judge me for coming here. My buddy brings me, you understand.”

Someone older, Sue thought but didn't say. “Your buddy! He brings you but you wouldn't have come on your own?”

“No ma'am. Can't say that I would; not least at first. But it's different now. I like to see the girls, but that's all I do. I never meet anyone. Don't have the knack somehow. My buddy does better.”

“Just who is this friend you keep talking about?” Sue asked.

Jeff raised his head. Looked out to the dance floor; then pointed. “That's him. In the corner, dancing with the girl wearing the leather boots.”

Sue turned her head in time to see the young man in the red denim shirt raise a hand and lightly nudge Starr's left n****e. Sue immediately looked away, trying to shake the image of the boy's fingers on Starr's breast, but it lingered, like it had placed a stain on her retina.

“See that?” Jeff's voice lifted. “That's what I mean. He knows how to do it.”

“And that's what you want?” Sue returned her attention to Jeff. “To be out on the dance floor; rubbing the breasts of a girl you hardly know?”