11: Insomnia: Friday Night
934 Words
I kicked off my shoes as soon as I walked into the house. The porchlight shining through the front door window barely lit the foyer.
I dropped my purse on the side table. The table legs scraped the tile floor under the weight of my bag.
I turned on the living room lights, sighed, and plopped down on the nearest chair.
"Soon-to-be brides should dance through the door, not rattle their chains.”Mom leaned against the kitchen door jamb and dried a plate.
I shrugged. "I dunno, Mom. I just feel – anxious.”
Mom laughed. “Darling, it's normal to have the jitters. When your dad proposed, I couldn't eat for a week.”
I rubbed my feet on the carpet. "I know I should be happy. This is what I always wanted." I shook my head. "At least, it's what I thought I always wanted.”
"Would you like some company?”
I nodded.
She sat down kitty-corner to me in another chair.
I took her hand and squeezed it. "Mom, what will I do without you?”
"Penny, you'll only be moving a few miles away.”
"It might as well be a few universes away.”
Mom raised an eyebrow. "You're not the happiest frog in the pond, are you?”
I shook my head.
"Tell you what.”Mom put on the glasses she wore on a chain around her neck, and picked up a pad of paper on the end table next to her chair. She drew a pencil line down the middle of the paper and handed the pad to me.
"What am I supposed to do with this?”
"On one side, list all the things that you love about Ronnie and about marrying him. On the other side of the line, list all the things that scare you.”
"Then what?”
Mom looked at me. "We can talk about your list. If the things that really scare you are too much, we'll call off the wedding. It's not too late.”
"And otherwise?”
"You'll make me the happiest mother of the bride, ever.”Mom got up and kissed me on the forehead. "I've got to finish up dinner. Your dad will be home soon.”
=
Mom and Dad had gone to bed a couple of hours ago, but I couldn't sleep. The wind knocked the tree branches against the side of the house, casting dancing shadows across the walls, and the twigs scratched my bedroom window. I wrapped my robe around me before I checked the latch to make certain the window was locked. Then I jumped under my comforter.
The pad of paper and a pen was on my nightstand. The line on that pad made my jaw clench even more than the tree clawing to get into my bedroom.
"It's just a line, just a line," I said out loud. I picked up the pad, and ran a finger down the line. "Just a line, see?”I thought the pencil line would blur under my finger.
But instead, it opened up, almost like a zipper. And light flashed through the opening.
"What?”I stuck my finger through the opening. I felt warmth.
"I wonder….”I stuck my hand through the opening, slowly. Then my arm. Then my shoulder. Nothing grabbed me. Nothing bit me. I felt that warmth again. Almost a floaty warmth. Maybe this was what being in the womb felt like.
"Wow.”What else could I say?
I pulled my hand back out. My skin sparkled.
I pulled the line apart and looked inside. Or outside. Or wherever it was. It was nothing like I'd ever seen before.
I pulled the belt off my robe, and tied one end to the bedpost. Cautiously, I stepped through the opening between the lines, and holding onto the belt, lowered myself into this new world. The hole opened wider to let me in.
My feet didn't reach anything solid, so I let go of the belt, and floated down. I could just have easily floated up, because there didn't seem to be any real up or down. Swirls of purples and yellows and reds and pinks and oranges flashed and tinkled, disappearing and reappearing at odd intervals.
The light was goldenish, and the air had the faint scent of gingerbread cookies my grandmother left last Christmas.
Now and again, everything moved in unison, almost as though carried on waves.
In the distance, I heard a rumbling. Darkness appeared slowly around the edges of everything I could smell and hear and see. The swirls moved faster. The wave motion was more frequent and higher.
As I tried to float up towards my belt, my legs suddenly felt so heavy. I looked down. My body was stretching. I couldn't see my feet, but I could feel something pulling them down. My heartbeat quickened. I grabbed onto some of the swirls and tried to pull myself up. I could almost reach….
I lost my grip. I fell into utter blackness.
I screamed.
=
"Darling, are you ok?”Mom kissed my forehead.
I gulped. My eyelids fluttered. "What happened?”I clutched one end of the belt in my hands.
"You were screaming.”Mom unclenched my hands. "You look like you had an awful night. Did you get any sleep?”
I shook my head. Tears rolled down my cheeks.
Dad hugged me. “Penny, why is that belt attached to your bed?"
I took a deep breath. “You'd never believe me."
- Writer
