Follow The Rules

Easier Option

Lips pressed into his, hurriedly, sloppily. What the hell was going on? For the faintest moment Oliver feared that he was having another nightmare, that it was his lips that were pressed into Oliver's. George's. But he knew he hadn't fallen asleep. He was with Daisy, in Daisy's room, with her lips against his own. Kissing him. He knew this. But in his head it wasn't her. It was George.

He pulled back from her almost as quickly as she had leapt at him, staggering back for a moment, staring at Daisy. It was Daisy. What the f**k was his problem? She was gorgeous in more than just looks. The way she had worried about him after school, but not pitied him. The way she was always there for him, even if she didn't know it. The way she took away the thought by simply being there. Why was he acting this way? Before he would have jumped at the chance to kiss a girl like Daisy. Sure, she wasn't popular or anything, but that had never mattered to him.

But of course. That was before. Now he couldn't kiss a girl without freaking out. Without remembering.

"Shit." She whispered, stepping even further away from him, holding her hands to her mouth in shock. Why was she shocked? She kissed him! "s**t, Ollie, why did I do that?" Oliver stood silently watching Daisy as she began to pace around the room. Why was she asking him? He was just as confused as she was.

"Oh my god. Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I shouldn't have done that, that was completely stupid." She began rambling. "I'm so stupid. I swear, Ollie, that was never the plan with bring you here. I didn't want to kiss you. Well, I mean I did, of course I did. But I didn't want to do it now. We've only known each other for like eight days and I went and kissed you. Jesus Christ."

Oliver watched her, leaning his hand against the wardrobe to steady himself while he tried to catch his breath. She had kissed him.

"I'm such an i***t. Here we were, actually becoming friends – something I never thought would actually happen – and now I've gone and kissed you, and now it's going to be so awkward. It's awkward right? Well of course it is, look at you. You obviously didn't want it. You look like a Dementor's come and tried to suck out your soul. Was I that bad? Don't answer that. Actually... No. Forget it, it's not important." She paced around the room, alternating between talking to herself and stopping to address him directly, but never waited long enough for him to even open his mouth to reply. Not that he could of had she given him the chance. She paced to her bed and slumped down on it.

"Are you going to say anything?" She practically whispered, looking at the floor in front of her.

"I-," He paused, gaping like a fish, not sure where to start with her rambling. "I'm sorry."

"Sorry?" Her head shot up to look at him. "You're sorry? Ollie, you didn't do anything wrong."

"I, I'm still sorry. I shouldn't have...I mean... It's not that I didn't... It's just that... I'm not..."

"Oh." She said, putting a stop to his meaningless rambling. "I get it. You're gay."

"NO." Oliver said way too eagerly and moved towards her before pausing. Gay. He hadn't thought about that. Did George think he was gay? Is that why he did it? Was he gay? No. No he knew he wasn't. He had never had any s****l feeling towards any guy. He loved John like a brother, and yeah sure, they had shared a bed when they were younger and slept at each other's house, and he'd seen the guy naked before, but that did nothing to him. He'd had crushes on girls before. Those little butterflies you get in your stomach when you see them in the halls at school or when they talk to you. That was definitely straight. But Oliver remembered reading something or seeing something about a guy who had been kidn*pped as a kid and came back gay. The guy he took him r***d. Did that mean that could happen to him? Was he gay now? Surely not. This kid was held for years and kidn*pped at like thirteen of something. Oliver knew he wasn't gay. He wasn't gay.

"No." He said a little calmer, but didn't get any closer to her. "I'm not gay, it's just that-,"

"You don't like me that way. Friends and all that." She interjected. Oliver looked at her again as he sat down on the desk chair he had occupied earlier. Her long brown hair pulled into a side braid today, but the shorter strands of her hair had fallen out, yet it still looked beautiful. Her eyes were deep and even though now they were full of hurt and embarrassment, Oliver could find himself staring aimlessly into them. Feel himself being sucked in by their gentle gaze. He could definitely like her more than a friend, and really wouldn't mind someone like Daisy at a girlfriend. But a girlfriend meant kissing, touching, and probably eventually s*x. He thought about it. About Daisy kissing Daisy, about her touching him, but his brain kept flicking from her soft, gentle hands to his large, rough ones all over him. Everywhere. How could he be her boyfriend if he freaked out every time she touched him?

"N-no, it's not that either, it's just..." He stammered. What the hell was he supposed to tell her? I can't kiss you because in my mind you turn into a creepy, middle aged man r****g me. No. That wouldn't work. He groaned in frustration and hung his head in his hands. Why did this have to be so hard? Why did George have to ruin everything? School, home, football, friends... love.

"It's okay." He jumped back when the voice came from right in front of him. God she was silent when she moved. She was now kneeling in front of him, looking at him with worry and handing him a box of tissues. "I'm sorry, I really didn't mean to upset you." He looked at her questioningly tissues? It was then that he felt a drop on his arm and he realised he was crying. Crying? What the f**k?

"You can talk to me you know." She continued, gazing up at him with those blue eyes.

"No I can't." He whispered. He couldn't talk to her. He just couldn't. But god, he wanted to. He wanted to tell her everything right then and there, looking into her eyes. She would listen, he knew she would. The thought of having someone who knew everything that he went through was so tempting. A person who understood why he did what he did. Someone who wouldn't judge him because he dropped out of football or had a meltdown in psychology. Someone who could tell him that it was going to be okay. That he was safe now. That he wasn't going crazy. That he wasn't disgusting.

"I've noticed, you know." Daisy said just as softly as he had spoken, he eyes glancing down to his arms resting on his knees. "You do well to hide them, but sometimes when you're drawing or something your sleeves come up." She moved a hand to gentle touch it to his left wrist. "The bruises. The cuts. What happened?" Subconsciously he tugged his arm away from her hand and pulled down her shirt sleeves nervously. She'd noticed? How many other people had seen?

"Nothing." He pushed himself up out of the chair and away from Daisy, gathering up his bag.

"Were you tied up or something?" She continued, pushing herself up off the floor to follow him. Oliver ignored her question. "The black eye you had. The fact that you're always so jumpy. Something happened to you." He wasn't sure if what she was saying was supposed to be a question or a statement, but he chose to answer her anyway.

"Nothing happened." He said sternly as he headed down the hall to the door.

"I don't believe you." Daisy called, following after him. Oliver stopped when he saw Brenda and Ash sitting in the lounge room watching T.V. and Ash, making a gun out of lego. "Thank you for dinner, Ma'am." He forced a smile as Brenda looked over to him.

"You're going already, Ollie?" She asked and Daisy declined at the same time that Oliver said "yes."

"Stay." Daisy said, reaching out to grab onto Oliver's forearm but he quickly ripped it away from her reach.

"Thanks for having me." Oliver opened the door without another word and headed down the footpath. He pretended not to notice Daisy following after him.

"Okay." She said once they got to the drive. "I'm sorry. Nothing happened to you. Please don't act like this." Oliver turned around to face Daisy who had stopped at the end of the driveway and began walking backwards down the street.

"Don't be sorry." He shrugged, faking a smile. He was pleases that Daisy had dropped the issue, but only to satisfy him. Only to make him stay. She didn't really believe that he was fine, that nothing was wrong, and that scared him. He believed that pretending to be fine with the whole situation was the best way to fool her. "Thanks for having me. It was fun. See you at school." He gave a brief wave before turning and hurrying off down the road.

The second he had turned the corner at the first street and out of Daisy's line of sight, he let the panic and anger take over. She knows. Not the specifics, but she knows something's up with him She knows that something happened that caused him to change, even though she didn't know how he acted before it all happened. She still knew.

How did they go from being nothing more than companions, to kissing, to fighting about Oliver's past? It all seemed to be moving too fast. His mind wondered back to the kiss she had given him. It was short, unmoving, uncomplicated. A simple kiss. A trial kiss. A kiss that could start a relationship. A proper, boyfriend girlfriend relationship. It was nice. Her lips were soft, gentle and warm. Her breath was a of combination that smelt slightly of soya sauce from dinner, and just... her. She tasted like Daisy. There was no other way to describe it. He kind of enjoyed it.

That was, until he was brought back to rough, harsh lips that tasted of cigarettes and stale male. Lips that took no time to make it enjoyable for him, that were simply full of lust and the desire to fill needs. Hands that searched his body to sate the s****l urges he couldn't control. Words that he was sure were meant to comfort him, but sent nothing but fear and a feeling of filth through his body.

Why did he do that? Why did his mind decide to remember something he only wished to forget in a moment that he wanted to enjoy? Anger simmered inside him. George. It was Georges fault. He had managed to ruin a moment that could have been so amazing and he didn't even have to be there.

Oliver didn't notice when he had started running home, but it wasn't until he had actually passed his house and had to turn around and double back, almost completely breathless that he forced himself to calm down and breathe. He stormed inside, ignoring his mother's half hearted question about how John was and ran to his room.

This was ridiculous. He knew it was, but still found himself curled up in the corner of his room, hugging his arms around his knees and trying to calm down the tears. They were gone. George wasn't coming back and he hadn't said anything to anyone anyway, so there was no need for him to ever see his kidnappers again. How could they still have such a hold on him? Why couldn't he forget everything that happened and move on with his normal life? There was nothing stopping him from being with Daisy or hanging out with his friends on the team. Nothing except the irrational fear that even he couldn't place. What was he scared of? What did he think would happen to him if he hung around with them? Probably punch one of them in their ignorant f*****g face, that's what. And that was the real truth. He hated them. All of them, John, Daisy, every kid at that school that dared to complain about their petty problems. They could never know what it felt like to be him. They could never understand, and he was jealous of them. Of course he knew he didn't have it too bad. He was home, safe with his family after one weekend. There were people who endured what he went through for years, some even from people they knew. He had it easy. They could have easily killed him if they wanted. Ended his life right there, never to see his friends and family's faces again. Never to complete high school. Never get a job, have his own family, have a life.

Right now, however, Oliver felt like death might have been the easier option.