One day

Chapter 22

I'm Sen, one day I confirm everything regarding me and Sana.

That's what I'll do after clearing all my grudges against the thug in front of me.

I've said so much, it's rare that I tell others so much. Maybe it's because I'm narrating that I can talk freely like that, it's good that he doesn't answer me back, but I need him to answer some questions.

"If you don't tell me your name, shall I call you Bastard?" In fact, I didn't expect him to answer this question, because I really wanted to call him Bastard.

But of course, things won't go my way, Bastard replied, "I have a name too, you mustn't call me that."

The low voice I heard showed his grumpy nature, saying that this man was extremely rude and liked to do stupid things.

It is often said not to judge others by their appearance, but obviously, the impression of the appearance is extremely important, even if I don't directly judge it when I look at other people's looks, I default to that what kind of person is that.

Sana is right, this thug will not have a good future at all, if something happens to him right now, I won't be responsible.

“Others tell me you're trash, no one cares even if you die…” I walked down my bed, moving to pull aside the curtain separating us. Of course, I knew this room had a camera, so I dared to do so, it's more convenient that the hospital won't record the patient's words.

“Hey Bastard, tell me if I was going to kill you, how would you do it?”

When he heard that, he didn't hesitate to glare at me making me feel extremely strange, then he sat up straight to easily face me, maybe he decided to negotiate. The night was falling, the floor was getting very cold, and unfortunately, I was barefoot so I couldn't stand there for too long and ran back to my bed.

I thought I was slow to communicate, but unexpectedly he was slower than me.

"You should talk quickly, the doctor is going to check." I shivered as I grabbed the blanket that covered me, leaving only my eyes to stare at him.

But he got up and pulled the curtain closed without a crevice causing my conversation to end here, I was not satisfied I wanted to get up and draw the curtain again but before I touched the ground, I heard footsteps the nurse's feet came.

The door just opened a little, but the cold wind has already rushed in, the nurse didn't close the door, which made me very angry, but I can't blame it.

The nurse advised us a few things like to pay attention to our activities or not to be active, and something like that. Her voice was loud and clear, but under the current cold, I couldn't hear a word.

The moment she left and closed the door, I breathed a sigh of relief, feeling the space warm up little by little but extremely comfortable.

"You're so lucky, you'll be discharged from the hospital soon." I was a bit jealous of him, even though he was so badly injured he was still able to get out of the hospital before me.

I don't know if I was seriously injured but I feel like I can live a normal life without having to go to the hospital for a thorough treatment, anyway, before that my parents took me to the hospital every day for a week it's been a long time.

This time, I accidentally discovered this disease, I don't know if it's luck or bad luck.

At this rate, I won't be able to see Sana, maybe I should give her a call. I don't know if she is discharged now or not, I really hope she will visit me even just once. As for Lilith, the possibility is that she really ignores me.

"You talk too much, go to sleep now, please."

This is what I often say to Lilith, but today, but today I experienced how it feels to be complained about, it's really… pretty funny, maybe I understand why Lilith always wants to tease me.

"Come on, you haven't answered my questions yet." I didn't want to sleep at all, trying to talk a lot to make him wake up with me.

It's really boring staying up alone, the nights before I didn't want to sleep, I had to stay awake looking at the ceiling and not be able to do anything, moreover, I had to watch Lilith sleep soundly. 

Sometimes I feel it's not fair that she can sleep so well and I can't, so I call her to wake up and stay up the night with me, but when I don't pay attention she ends up falling asleep.

Nightmares are a cyclical thing, as long as I endure them for a few more weeks, they will go away on their own and a good night's sleep will return to me, even though it is having a very bad impact on my life now.

"I'll say it one last time, you need to go to sleep now, stop annoying me."

"... Okay." I gloomily replied to a sentence, obediently went to sleep, not completely escaping from reality, I was dragged into a nightmare. I was so angry that I stomped my feet, obviously knowing this was going to happen early on, but I still went to bed without warning.

Only when my mind is so tired that I can't think about anything anymore, I can sleep until morning.

I was locked in my own dream, times like that I encouraged myself that everything would pass, but it wasn't enough to stop my tears.

Why am I the only one being tormented, why can't I be normal like everyone else, why am I not happy - these are all questions that I ask myself many times.

Of course, there was no reply, I just asked to relieve my temporary frustrations.

“…” As soon as I opened my eyes, I saw that Bastard's accomplices were already here, this left me at a loss for words.

I lay with my back to them, pretending not to notice, but still listening to what they say. After a short while, they all left without anyone noticing me, it seems I was worrying too much, it's just strange that they would leave me alone this time.

I don't expect them to harm me again, but they should at least threaten me as usual, yet they act like this makes me feel rather weird and insecure.

Temporarily ignoring that feeling of insecurity, I went outside and asked the nurse to let me make a phone call.

“Why are you calling me now? I was discharged from the hospital a few days ago.”

Sana lamented my tardiness, I laughed and said: "Or you can come to visit me now, I've been hospitalized for a while."

On the other end of the line, Sana was silent for a long time, when I assumed she had stopped answering the phone she said, "You've changed."

My whole body trembled a little, my face turned pale with fear, trying to calm down and say, "That's is no way."

Before, I didn't realize that while I was afraid of other people changing, I also changed, but Sana randomly said that made me really confused, now I can't even remember what I was like before again.

I hate change, it makes me unable to follow the rules laid down by my old self. Without those familiar rules I would be disoriented to lose perception, and people would inevitably say my decisions were crazy.

Sana said, "I'm telling the truth-"

I interrupted her: "I called you today to talk to you about something important for a moment, would you mind now?"

Sana replied seriously: "I'm having time right now, you tell me I hear."

Then I told Sana about a suspicious man looking for her the other day, telling her to be careful because I accidentally revealed my location through the call, most likely he found her in this city.

Contrary to my worried expression, Sana seemed very relaxed, she calmly said: "I have solved that problem, thank you for your concern."

I frowned, feeling a little annoyed, but then I continued: "And what happened the other day, although I've already guessed part of the story, I still want to hear what you have to say."

The first time she was in the police station there were already a lot of people talking bad about her, and none of them cared about the truth, all they needed was to put others down. I don't want that, so I need her to confirm it herself.

“What happened there?”

“James told you everything?”

James hasn't said anything to me yet, the only thing he said was that I had to stay away from Sana, but when Sana asked that, I lied: "Yes, James told me everything."

Sana closed her mouth and slowly said: "Yes, he's not wrong."

What? I haven't said anything James told me yet, I just wanted to test Sana to see if she wanted to tell everything, but she seemed to be trying her best not to mention a word related to the truth.

Since she said everything James said is true, I'm afraid Sana is at the same time confirming that she was trying to take advantage of me. Receiving this information is too much for me, it feels like the whole world is deceiving me, every flower and blade of grass looks so fake.

All right, I had to say my guess: "So those thugs came to take revenge on me and you accidentally got caught up, right?"

Sana replied without thinking: "Yes, I've wanted to apologize to you for so long because I accidentally opened the door to let them into your house..." She paused for a moment and then continued: "You believe me if I said I didn't know the people who came to your house were them?"

I believe it, at that time Sana was seriously ill, she looked dreamy, even opening her eyes was difficult, let alone seeing, so of course, she couldn't tell who the person was. Since then I have not doubted what she said anymore, anyway, she has not confirmed that James said she wanted to take advantage of me was right.

“Did James come to pick you up in time?” I ask.

“What's up? Did he give you a hard time?"

I thought to myself, not only is it difficult, he directly hates me.

"Well, it doesn't matter, I'll see you some other time." I hung up and returned it to the nurse, then forgot that I hadn't given Sana my phone number, but seeing that the nurse was gone, I didn't bother to bother her anymore.