After

Chapter one

My alarm is set to go off any minute. I've been awake for half the night, shifting back and forth, counting the lines between the ceiling tiles and repeating the course schedule in my head. Others may count sheep; I plan. My mind doesn't allow a break from planning, and today, the most important day and my tire 18 is years of life, is no exception.

" Tessa!" I hear my mother's voice call from downstairs. Groaning to myself, I roll out of my tiny bed. I take my time tuck in the corners of my bedsheets against the headboard because this is the last morning that this will be part of my routine. After today, this bedroom is no longer my home.

" Tessa!" she calls again.

" I'm up!" I go back. The noise of the cabinets opening and slamming clothes downstairs make it known that she is feeling just as panicked as I am. My stomach is tied in a tight knot, and as I start my shower I pray that the anxiety I feel will lessen as the day goes on. All my life has been a series of tasks in preparation for this day, my first day of college. 

I spent the last few years nervously anticipating this. I spent my weekend studying and preparing4 this as my peers were hanging out, drinking, and doing whatever else it is teenagers do to get themselves in trouble. That wasn't me. I was a girl who spent her nights studying cross-legged on the living room floor with my mother while she gossiped and watchtowers of QVC to find ways to improve her appearance.

The day in my acceptance letter to Washington Central University came I couldn't have been more thrilled- and my mother cried for what felt like hours. I can't deny that I was proud but all my hard work had finally paid off. I have gotten into the only College I applied for and, because of low income I had enough grants to keep my student loans to a minimum. I had once, just for a moment considered leaving Washington for college. But seeing all the color drained from my mother's face of the suggestion power and the way she paced around the living room for nearly an hour, I told her I hadn't been serious about that.

The moment I stepped into the spray of the shower water some of the tension leaves my strong muscles. I'm standing there, under the hot water, trying to calm my mind, but really doing the opposite, and I get so distracted by the time I finally wash my hair and body, I barely have enough hot water to run a razor over my legs from the knee down.

I wrap the towel around my wet body, my mother calls my name yet again. Knowing that it's her nerves getting the best of her I'd give her some leeway but I take the time to blow dry my hair. I know she's anxious for my arrival day at college, but I have had this planned down to the hour for months. Only one of us can be a wreck, and I need to do what I can to make sure it's not me by following my plan.

My hands Shake as I fumbled with the zipper on my dress. I don't care for the thing, but my mother insisted that I wear it. I finally win the battle with the zipper pull on my favorite sweater from the back of my closet. As soon as I'm dressed I feel slightly less nervous until I notice a small tear in the sleeve of my sweater. I tossed it back on my bed flip my shoes on to my feet knowing that my mother is growing more impatient with every second that passes.

My boyfriend, Noah, will be here soon to ride with us. He's a year younger than me but will turn 18 soon he is brilliant and has Straight A's just like I did and- I am so excited- he's planning on joining me at wcu next year. I really wish he was coming now, especially considering that I won't have a single person at college, but I'm thankful that he's promised to visit as often as possible. I just need a decent roommate; That's the only thing I'm asking for and the only thing that I can't control with planning.

"Ther-e-saaaa!" 

" Mother, I'm coming down now. Please do not scream my name again!" I yell as I walk down the stairs Noah sitting at the table across from my mother, staring down at the watch on his wrist. The blue of his polo shirt matches the light blue of his eyes and his blond hair combed lightly gelled perfection.

"hey, college girl" he smiles bright, perfectly line Smile as he stands. He pulled me into a tight hug and I close my mouth when I catch his expensive cologne. Yeah, sometimes you overdo it a bit with that. 

" hey," I give him an equally bright smile, trying to hide my nerves, and pull my dirty blond hair into a ponytail.

" honey, we can wait a couple of minutes while you fix your hair," my mother says quietly.

I make my way to the mirror and nod; She's right. My hair needs to be presentable for today, and of course, she didn't hesitate to remind me. I should have curled it the way she likes it anyhow, as a little goodbye gift.

" I'll put your bags in the car" Noah offers, opening his poem for my mother to drop the keys into. With a quick kiss on the cheek, he disappears from the room, eggs, and hand, and my mother follows him.

Round Table styling my hair ends with a better result than the first, and I brushed the lint roll over my gray dress one last time.

As I go outside and walk to the car packed up with my things, the butterflies in my stomach dance around, making me slightly relieved that I have a two-hour drive to make them disappear.

I have no idea what college will be like, and unexpectedly, the question that keeps dominating my thoughts is: will they make friends?