LET LOVE FIND YOU

Chapter 4: First Love

The magic of first love is our ignorance that it can ever end. (-Benjamin Disrealli)

*****

ENZO

They say, first love never dies but it seems to me those words are meaningless anymore.

I had my first dose of heartbreak with what the so-called “first love” and I swear I wouldn't want to feel that again anymore. Kung pwede at kailangang iwasan, gagawin ko.

I remembered that moment clearly. I was this thin, young boy who was so mesmerized and captivated by her beauty. Iba ang dating nya bawat sandali na nakikita ko sya at sa mura kong edad, I took that admiration and infatuation to her by heart.

We used to live in the same village... on the same block.

Her house was just three houses away from ours.

She was this cute, kikay girl who loved to wear anything yellow. Yellow dress, yellow ribbon on her long straight, black and shiny hair, and all the yellow accessories every girl could have. Even her bike's color was yellow!

And her nanny's scrub suit too! You could easily recognize them from afar because of that stunning color.

I don't know what it was that it seemed like when you see her, she brightens like a ray of the sun.

Every afternoon, most children in our village would go out in the streets to play, with our Yayas tagging along.

Sometimes, we would go to our village's playground. It was one thing that the children really look forward to every afternoon.

At that time, I really thought that she was extraordinary.

Nabubukod tangi sa ibang mga babaeng batang kalaro namin or nakakahalubilo namin sa village.

There was something in her that really made me feel like a love-struck, young boy at an early age.

I was 6 or 7 then, or maybe 8? My mind refuses to recall that now.

Dwayne and I were neighbors too, for ages. Their house was just across ours so he was literally my official playmate and my self-acclaimed brother. I didn’t have one, and neither was he, so we claimed and considered each other as brothers.

I was always excited every time I woke up from my afternoon nap during weekends or vacations because it would only mean that my younger sister Era and I could go out for our afternoon outdoor activity.

Our nannies would bring us out in the streets or into the playground to play while they busied themselves talking with other nannies.

Dwayne and I used to love skateboarding while Era would bring her 3 wheeled bicycle and play with other kids.

I remember seeing her for the first time and from then on, I look forward to afternoons like that.

For weeks, I have been eyeing her. And though parati nalang nag chichikahan ang mga yaya namin sa labas habang kami'y naglalaro, ilang beses na din akong nagpapapansin sa kanya.

And the only way to make her notice me ay yung inisin sya.

I remember I would always tell her she looks like a mannequin with all the accessories she wore. Tapos, pagtatawanan namin sya ni Dwayne kasi noong una, di pa sya marunong mag bike.

Habang sya inis na inis sa pagbibiro namin sa kanya, ako naman ay masayang masaya, not because I made her mad, but because it was my way para pansinin nya.

But it wasn’t a good way yata noon kasi mas lalong di nya ako pinansin, at palagi pa nya akong iniirapan.

Then the most dreaded day came when my parents decided to move to another village. My parents decided to buy a bigger house in another village at kahit na gustong gusto ko ang swimming pool dun sa bago namin bahay, I would still choose to stay if given a choice.

I felt so sad when we were told about it.

The day before we left, I finally got a nerve to give her flowers and a short note. Love letter na ang tawag dun before. Tinulungan ako ni Dwayne na pumitas ng orchids sa garden ng mommy nya ng hindi alam ni Tita.

I remembered it clearly when I asked my Yaya to give it to her kasi ewan ko bakit nahiya akong lumapit sa kanya. Di naman ako nahiya noong niloloko ko sya or iniinis.

Nagtatago kami ni Dwayne sa bushes malapit sa gate ng kapitbahay namin habang lumalapit si yaya sa kanila.

She was on her yellow bike again.

I saw how she was dismayed.

Tinanggap nya ang flowers but she was frowning.

And when our yayas started to tease her, nakita kong tinapon nya nag bulaklak at tumakbo papasok sa bahay nila.

I was so hurt na gusto kong umiyak nun pero pinigilan ko kasi baka tatawanan ako ni Dwayne.

But I think my yaya told my parents, kasi biniro nila ako at di ko na lang sila pinansin. Mas lalo akong naiiyak.

That same night, hindi ako nakatulog. I had mixed emotions… sa paglipat namin sa bagong bahay, sa paghihiwalay namin ni Dwayne at sa pag-iwan ko kay Aika.

Naks! Akala talaga friends kami na iiwanan ko no! Asa ka Enzo! Di nga tinanggap ang bulaklak mo.

It was, I think, my first heartbreak.

And that was the last time I saw her...

Until I found out that we went to the same university.

?????