As I stepped onto the plane, I didn’t look back. I knew there was a whole lot I was leaving behind—Kimberly, my family who I was on slightly better terms with. And Charlie. I knew I was risking losing everything, especially him, and he might have just been perfect for me. In fact, I was pretty convinced that he was. But the timing was so, so wrong, and there was nothing I could do to change that. Right now, I needed to get my head sorted out. I needed to work out where I was, who I was. I needed to ‘find myself’—whatever that meant. I didn’t know who I was if not the ‘dying girl’ and I needed to figure that out or I would be stuck in a rut forever. Being here, among all the mistakes I’d made, just wasn’t the place to do that. I’d travelled before, but that was all about seeing all that

