Bound by Moonfire

CHAPTER2-DISAPPOINTMENT

Disappointment

ARIA'S POV

After several attempts to assist in the preparation, I was sent back up by my father to get dressed. Since lunch is over, I need to be the first to get dressed since it's my engagement today.

I managed to walked upstairs, enter my room shutting the door behind, just like that, the wolf went quiet.

Tradition says the bride must spend her final hours before the ceremony alone — reflecting, purifying her mind before she binds herself to another wolf for the rest of her life. That's what the elders always say. To me, it felt like being locked away with nothing but my own thoughts for company, most likely to regret your choice in my own case because lately my thoughts are not gentle houseguests.

I sank onto the edge of my bed, staring at the dress laid out beside me pale gold, embroidered at the sleeves, the kind of dress meant for brides who are happy to get married, or girls who was proud to wear it.

I wasn't sure I was that girl.

I pressed my palms against my eyes, the memory came rushing back uninvited, the way it always did when I let my guard down, or stayed alone when things got overwhelming.

Focus, Arry. You have to want it. I said to myself.

But that didn't stop the memories.

I remembered sitting in my father's office when I was little, my legs not even long enough to touch the floor from his huge wooden chair. The room always smelled like pine and old leather and something bitter, like books nobody read anymore. Sunlight came through the tall windows and I used to just stare at the dust floating in it like tiny stars or something.

My father leaned forward, elbows on the desk, looking at me the way he only ever looked at me.

"Aria," he said, "you're my only child. One day you're going to lead this pack."

My stomach flipped, I didn't know if I was excited or scared. "But Papa… girls don't become Alphas."

"Then you'll be the first." He said it so easy, like it was already decided, like the whole world was just going to bend around it.

I kept tugging at my little training tunic sleeves. "What if I'm not strong enough?"

He frowned, but not in a mean way. "You are strong enough. But you're going to have to work harder than anybody else." His voice went lower. "The men will question you. The elders will doubt you. They'll look at you and only see weakness."

"Because I'm a girl?" I whispered.

"No," he said, firm. "Because you'll be a threat."

I was six and that still gave me chills.From that day he trained me like crazy.

"Again."

"Faster."

"No hesitation."

"Get up, your enemy isn't going to wait for you."

Then I turned sixteen and everything just fell apart. My sixteenth birthday was supposed to be the night everything finally made sense, the night I shift, the night my wolf shows up and I finally prove I'm not just some girl living off her father's dream.

My mum was up before the sun even rose, dresses hanging off both her arms, practically vibrating with excitement.

"Green," she decided, smoothing out the ceremonial dress on my bed. "It brings out the strength in your eyes."

"Mama…" my stomach was already twisting. "What if today isn't the day?"

She stopped and sat next to me, grabbing my hands. "Aria, even if it doesn't happen tonight, you are not a failure. You hear me?" She tucked my hair behind my ear. "But it's going to happen. I just know it."

I wanted to believe her so badly.

By evening the whole pack was already gathered outside. Torches flickering everywhere, moon hanging heavy and full in the sky, a perfect shifting moon everyone kept saying.

Warriors made a wide circle around me, whispering the whole time.

"She'll do it."

"She has to."

"She's an Alpha's daughter."

"Unless the rumors are true…"

The whispers wrapped around me tighter and tighter like a noose or something.

My father stepped beside me and even without saying a word I could feel his whole presence pressing down on me. He put his hand on my shoulder.

"You're ready, Aria."

"What if I'm not?" I whispered.

He turned me to face him, his eyes sharper than the blade at his hip. "You are. I trained you myself. You're strong. You're worthy. The pack is going to see that tonight."

But worthiness didn't mean anything to the moon.

When the ritual started I stepped into the clearing, the grass cold and wet under my bare feet, my heart slamming so hard against my chest.

My father stood behind me. "Focus," he murmured. "Close your eyes. Feel the shift."

So I did.

I breathed in deep, searching for something, anything, inside me. Waiting for the heat, the pull, the rush everyone always talked about like it was the easiest thing in the world.

All I felt was… me. Plain. Humans. Nothing different.

Panic hit first. I tried again. And again.

The moonlight felt heavy on my skin, like it was pressing down on me, daring me to fail in front of everybody I loved.

The whispers got louder.

"Why isn't she shifting?"

"She's sixteen, this is late."

"Maybe she isn't—"

"No. Impossible."

My eyes were burning. Humiliation and fear all mixed up together.

"Aria." My father's voice went tight. "Concentrate. You're not focusing."

"I am," I choked out. "I'm trying… Papa, I'm trying."

"Do it again."

He never raised his voice at me, not once. He didn't need to. Disappointment was loud enough all on its own.

I clenched my fists so hard my nails dug into my palms, like maybe pain could shake something loose. I pictured claws. Fur. My wolf just breaking through already.

Nothing.

Just silence. Cold and crushing silence.

A tear slipped down my cheek before I even realized it. My knees were shaking but I forced myself to stay standing.

My father's jaw was clenched so tight I thought it might actually c***k. He turned away from the pack just enough that only I could hear him.

"Aria." His voice barely holding together. "Again."

My chest just caved in. "Papa… please."

Something flickered in his eyes. Not anger. Not even disappointment.

Fear.

For me. For the pack. For every plan he built around a daughter who apparently wasn't going to come through.

When my legs finally gave out I sank to my knees, breath shaking in the cold night air. The murmurs around me got sharper.

"Maybe she's not meant to lead."

"She's too human."

"Maybe the Moon Goddess didn't bless her."

Elder Thom stepped forward, bowing his head to my father. "Alpha… maybe we should continue this another night."

My father didn't answer. He didn't even look at me.

He just turned around and walked away. That moment carved itself into me, right into the part of my chest where the bruise never really healed.

A knock came through, jolting me out of my crying spell.