Random One-Shot

Two Mornings: The Cold War of Parenting

♛┈⛧┈ ༶ Enjoy the read, LilyButterfly ༶ ┈⛧┈♛

You and Satoru have been enemies since kindergarten, always hating each other. You once thought you could get rid of him one day, but instead you were forced to marry him, and now you even have a baby together.

One very early morning, around 2 a.m., you were fast asleep. Suddenly, the baby started crying, but you were too tired to hear it. Suddenly, Satoru jumps into bed, startling you awake.

“Wake up, you lazybones! Our baby’s hungry!” he shouts. He hadn’t been sleeping; he’d probably just

“Seriously, Satoru… shut your mouth or I’ll really get rid of you this time,” I mutter hoarsely, my face still buried in the pillow.

It felt like I’d only closed my eyes for five minutes after a day of housework, and now this “Demon King” was jumping on the bed as if it were a playground, not the sacred 2:05 AM. I could feel the bed shaking violently because of his antics.

I turned over with great effort, squinting at his silhouette, which looked far too fresh for someone who hadn’t slept.

“You're already awake,” I said, kicking his leg from under the covers. “Why don't you just take care of it? Just use the bottle in the warmer. Besides, didn't you say you were ‘the strongest’? Do you really have to wake up the whole neighborhood just to take care of one hungry baby?”

Satoru smirked—I could feel it even in the dark—and he deliberately sat closer, snatching my spare pillow.

“Oh, I am the strongest, but I don’t have the ‘facilities’ to breastfeed, Honey,” he teased in a feigned innocent tone that made me want to punch him. “Come on, wake up! If he keeps crying, I’ll start singing to calm him down, and you know how terrible my voice is. Take your pick: get up now or listen to my death-defying concert?”

I growled low, a sound more like a predator’s threat than a human waking up. With the last of my strength, I snatched the pillow from under my head and slammed it right into Satoru’s smug, grinning face.

Ouch!

“Ouch! That was rough, wasn't it?” he exclaimed, though he chuckled as he caught the pillow with ease.

“Shut up, Satoru! Your voice is louder than a baby’s cry,” I whispered sharply as I tried to sit up. My hair was a mess, and my eyes felt glued shut from sheer exhaustion. I glanced toward the crib in the corner of the room where the little cries were growing louder.

I pulled back the blanket and stood up with unsteady steps. As I passed Satoru, who was still sitting casually on the edge of the bed, I deliberately elbowed his arm hard.

“Listen up, ‘Strongest Wizard.’ If I come back to the bed and you haven’t prepared warm water to change the diaper, I’ll make sure your breakfast tomorrow morning is stale cereal,” I threatened as I walked toward the crib.

Satoru just leaned on his elbow, watching me with that playful look that always made me want to throw something at him. “You’re so mean. But honestly, you look even more ‘attractive’ when you’re ranting like this right after waking up.”

I sat in the rocking chair in the corner of the room, ignoring Satoru, who was still acting annoyingly on the bed. As soon as our baby started nursing, a peaceful silence slowly enveloped the room again. The rhythmic sound of his little suckling was the only thing that soothed my nerves, which were frayed from lack of sleep. But of course, Satoru wouldn’t let this moment pass without a disturbance.

He rose from the bed with light, almost silent steps and walked over. Instead of disturbing me, he crouched down beside my chair. His large hand reached out, gently brushing away the strands of hair covering my face, then moved to touch the tiny fingers of our baby, who was clutching my shirt.

“Look at him,” Satoru whispered, his voice suddenly softening and losing its usual mocking tone. “So greedy—just like you when you’re hungry.”

I shot him a sharp glance, wanting to retort, but seeing the sparkle in his eyes as he gazed at the little one made my anger subside a bit. Even though we’re sworn enemies, there’s one thing I can’t deny: he really is a (strangely) very caring father.

“Stop staring at me like that, Satoru,” I muttered softly so as not to startle the baby. “Go on, get some warm water or something. Don’t just sit here like a statue.”

Satoru chuckled softly, his head resting on the arm of my rocking chair, looking up at both of us from below. “Just a minute. This view is way more interesting than a bottle of milk or a dirty diaper, you know.”

I let out a long sigh, closing my eyes for a moment as I felt the stiffness spreading from my neck to my shoulder blades. The 2 o’clock breastfeeding position really tests one’s physical endurance.

“Satoru,” I called softly, my voice still a little hoarse. “If you really don't want to move from there, at least be useful. My shoulder feels like it's about to fall off.”

Satoru raised an eyebrow, his mischievous grin reappearing. “Oh? So my arch-enemy is finally admitting she needs my help?”

“Don’t say another word or I’ll kick you out the window,” I threatened without opening my eyes.

He chuckled, but strangely, he didn’t argue anymore. Satoru stood up and moved behind the rocking chair. I could feel the warmth radiating from his body as he leaned over. Then, his large hands—the ones usually used to shatter curses—landed on my shoulders.

His touch wasn’t as rough as I’d expected. With just the right amount of pressure, his fingers began massaging the stiff spots on my shoulders. Damn, he knew exactly where the soreness was.

“Feels good, doesn’t it?” he whispered right next to my ear; the warmth of his breath sent a shiver down my spine. “Only ‘The Strongest’ has massage techniques like this. You should be grateful—there are plenty of people out there who’d pay a fortune for this.”

“Noisy...” I muttered, but I couldn’t help but rest my head deeper as his massage moved down toward my spine. “Keep massaging and stop showing off, Satoru.”

I gently untangled the little one, who was now fast asleep, his breathing steady and calm. Carefully, I turned my head slightly toward Satoru, who was still busy massaging my shoulders.

“Satoru, that’s enough,” I whispered, holding his arm to make him stop. “He’s asleep. Now it’s my turn to rest. Put him back in his crib—gently, if you don’t want him to wake up and cry again.”

Satoru snorted softly, but he didn’t argue. He stepped forward and reached out his large hand to take the baby from my embrace. I felt a moment of unease—remembering how clumsy he usually was—but it turned out he did it very gently, as if he were holding the most precious (and most fragile) treasure in the world.

“Leave it to the expert,” he whispered in his usual arrogant tone, though his movements were very careful.

I stood there, my legs still a little wobbly, watching from behind as the tall man bent over the crib. The dim glow of the nightlight made his shadow look enormous, casting over the tiny bed.

“Done,” he said after a few tense seconds. He turned toward me with his hands on his hips, looking incredibly proud of himself as if he’d just won a major battle. “Didn’t wake up at all. I’m a natural at being a dad, right?”

I rolled my eyes, walking past him toward the bed that felt so inviting. “Yeah, yeah, whatever. Now move over—I want to sleep before the sun comes up.”

As soon as I lay down on the soft mattress, I felt Satoru crawl up to the other side of the bed. He pulled the blanket over both of us, then without warning, he wrapped his arm around my waist and pulled me closer.

“What are you doing? Let go, Satoru,” I grumbled, though I was too tired to really fight back.

“It's cold,” he mumbled, his voice sounding sleepy. “Besides, we already have a child. Stop acting like we’re still kindergarten enemies fighting over toys.”

I sighed in resignation, letting my body sink into the warmth of the bed and the embrace of his strong arms wrapped around my waist. Honestly, my drowsiness was far stronger than my ego right now. But still, letting Satoru win so easily without a fight wasn’t the style of a proper “arch-enemy.”

Just as he began breathing steadily against the hollow of my neck—thinking I’d completely surrendered to his embrace—I mustered the last of my strength in my right elbow.

Bugh!

“Ouch!—” Satoru groaned, his voice choked as I’d just elbowed his ribs with deadly precision.

“That’s for waking me up by jumping onto the bed earlier,” I whispered sharply without turning my head. “Don’t think just because we have a baby now, I’ll be sweet to you, Satoru.”

He winced, his hand rubbing the ribs I’d struck with my early-morning attack, but strangely, he tightened his embrace instead. He even gave a small laugh, his deep, hoarse voice—hoarse from sleepiness—echoing right against my back.

“Still as fierce as ever... but I like it,” she murmured, her voice slowly fading as she drifted off to sleep. “Good night, my beloved enemy.”

I didn’t reply. I closed my eyes, feeling her steady heartbeat against my back and the silence of the room finally returning to normal. Just for tonight—and tonight alone—I’ll let my greatest enemy be my personal pillow.

The morning sunlight began peeking through the bedroom curtains, but it wasn’t an alarm or birdsong that woke you. Instead, it was a strange “PLOP” sound, followed by a very familiar panicked murmur.

“Oh no… no, no, don’t go there! Stay right where you are, kid!”

You struggle to open your eyes, only to find the side of the bed next to you empty.

Your gaze shifts toward the crib, where Satoru is crouching in a very strange position. He’s holding our baby’s legs in the air with one hand, while the other holds a clean diaper as if it were a secret weapon he doesn’t know how to use.

Satoru’s usually arrogant face now looks pale. There’s a small yellow stain on the hem of his expensive shirt.

“Satoru?” your voice is hoarse, still half-asleep.

He turned his head with jerky movements, his white hair sticking out in all directions. “Honey! Great, you’re awake! Quick, get me some wet wipes! Your little army just launched a massive chemical attack, and I... I don’t think my powers are any use against this!”

Instead of crying, your baby was laughing merrily while kicking his diaper-free legs, completely oblivious to the fact that his father was on the verge of a mental breakdown.

♛┈⛧┈ ༶ The end ༶ ┈⛧┈♛