Backstage Pass

Chapter 18

Myrna rubbed Trey’s head, messing up his hair. “I’ll bake you a cherry pie, sweetie. Would you like that?”

He hugged her against his side and kissed her temple. “I love you. Brian, I love your woman.”

Brian smiled slightly, but didn’t look at Myrna when he said, “Don’t we all?”

They didn’t lose their tail as they wound through the aisles, but Kevin was a little less obvious about following them. He watched them from one aisle over.

The store had an excellent butcher who produced choice cuts of fresh meat. “We’ll have to clean out the freezer when we get back,” Myrna said. “I can’t pass up this meat.”

“The freezer is highly toxic,” Trey said. “Can’t we just throw out the whole refrigerator and get a new one?”

“Yeah, let’s do that,” Jace agreed. He was tossing T-bones into the cart as if they were having a buy-one-get-ten-free steak sale.

“Sheesh, Jace, are you hungry?” Myrna asked.

“There are fourteen of us.”

“Good point. Get ground beef. I’ll make chili.”

“Do you really want to be trapped on a tour bus with a bunch of guys who’ve consumed large quantities of chili beans?” Brian asked.

Myrna laughed. “Another good point. Okay, I’ll make lasagna instead. Tomorrow.”

“Now you’re talking.” Brian kissed her temple. “I love Italian food.”

“Make sure you get enough pork chops, Jace,” Sed insisted. “I’ll eat like three or seven of them.”

They made a second trip through the store for things she’d need for lasagna. By the time they finished, two carts were full to the top.

“I’m not sure all of this will fit in my car,” Myrna said. For a small car, the Thunderbird had a good-sized trunk, but their carts looked like they were stocking up to start their own mobile grocery store.

“We’ll make it fit,” Brian said. “Or load Eric up like a pack mule.”

“Uh, no,” Eric said.

Jace started unloading the cart onto the conveyer belt. Myrna had a hard time accepting what the groupies said about him. A sadomasochist? He was always such a sweetheart. Quiet. Shy. Gentle. If she hadn’t seen what he kept in his suitcase with her own eyes, she’d never have believed it. He didn’t even attempt to look like a natural blond. Platinum hair, dark beard stubble, dark brows. It was cute though. Myrna couldn’t put her finger on why. With that baby face of his, he looked like the requisite tough guy of a boy band, not a member of a metal band.

Jace must have felt her stare, because he glanced up, his brown eyes inquisitive. “What?”

She shook her head. “Nothing.” She handed him a package of Italian sausage. He placed it on the conveyer belt.

“God, I want a cigarette,” Trey said, eyeing the locked case behind the counter. He fidgeted with the zipper on his sleeve repeatedly before cleaning out an entire display of cherry suckers and dumping them on the checkout stand.

Myrna squeezed his elbow in encouragement and moved around Jace to the cashier.

“Did you find everything you needed?” the young woman asked as she dragged products over the scanner.

“I think so.” Myrna looked at the two cartfuls of groceries being unloaded by an assembly line of rock stars. She smiled to herself. “I hope so.”

A blood-curdling scream emitted from the back of the growing line. Sed’s body suddenly careened into Eric’s. Brian steadied them.

“Oh my God! Oh my God! Oh my God!” a high-pitched voice squealed from about the level of Sed’s belly button. A young girl, no older than thirteen, had almost knocked Sed to the floor with her exuberance. “Oh Sed, I love you. I love you!”

“So much for the retirement community theory,” Jace said as he continued to unload the cart.

Sed glanced at Eric with wide eyes. Eric shrugged.

Sed patted the girl’s head uncomfortably. “Hello there. I think you have me confused with someone else.”

“I’d know you anywhere,” she insisted. “You’re Sedric Lionheart. The lead singer of Sinners.”

Sed winced. The rest of the people in line started craning their necks, trying to glimpse the rock stars in their midst.

Sed bent and whispered something in the girl’s ear. Her face lit up and she nodded. She hugged him and returned to the back of the line, bouncing on the balls of her feet excitedly. Her entire body trembled from head to foot.

“What in the hell did you tell her?” Eric said under his breath. “She’s a child, Sed. I hope you didn’t—”

Sed punched him in the arm. Hard. “Have some faith in me, fuckhead.”

Another line opened, and the very young fan girl rushed to the front of the second line, knocking an elderly lady sideways in her haste. The girl kept her eyes on Sed the entire time the cashier rang up her small purchase. She paid and then rushed out of the store. She stood in front of the glass doors peering in at them from outside.

“What did you say to her?” Brian asked.

“I just told her if she was quiet, I’d autograph my shirt for her outside the store. What kind of sick bastard do you think I am?”

“You don’t want me to answer that,” Eric said.

“Sticks, you’re asking for a serious ass whippin’,” Sed said.

Brian presented his stack of cash to pay and they pushed the carts of sacked groceries to the car. Sed’s little shadow followed them, chattering excitedly. While the rest of them loaded the trunk, Sed removed his leather jacket and plain white T-shirt. He put his jacket back on and borrowed a pen from Myrna. He signed his shirt before handing it over to the girl. She lifted it to her nose and inhaled, her eyes rolling into the back of her head. Sed ran a hand over his shorn hair, looking very uncomfortable about the entire situation.

“Can I get the band’s autographs, too?” the girl asked.

“Of course!” Sed said, taking the shirt back and passing it around until each band member had signed it.

The trunk was full to bursting with groceries, but they managed to get it shut on the third try. After returning to their vehicles, Brian drove out of the parking lot, with Jace following on his bike. The young fan waved good-bye to them, clutching Sed’s shirt to her narrow chest.

“f**k, what a disaster. I’m glad you guys signed the shirt, too. I didn’t think of what that would look like when I told her that she could have it. What was I thinking?” Sed said. “I could just picture her daddy showing up outside the tour bus with a shotgun.”

“It was completely innocent,” Myrna said.

“Yeah, but if your thirteen-year-old daughter comes home with some man’s shirt, you wouldn’t think it was innocent. You’d want to shoot him in the back.”

“I suppose that would look bad,” Myrna agreed.

“I guess when you say you’d give your fans the shirt off your back, you aren’t exaggerating,” Brian said.

They laughed. Sed’s body relaxed, though he kept checking the side mirror for signs of an angry daddy with a shotgun.

Brian pulled up beside the tour bus and put the car in park. “Last one out of the car has to do all the laundry.”

“I don’t do laundry,” Sed grumbled. Before the words were out of his mouth, Brian had already leapt from the car and Eric scrambled out after him.

Sed grabbed Myrna around the waist and refused to release her. “I won’t be the last one out of this car. I don’t do laundry.”

“Then get one of your groupies to do it for you. I’m not doing it.”

He buried a hand in her hair and tugged her head back to stare down into her eyes. “I’ll make it worth your while.”

Myrna leaned against the door, which opened unexpectedly. She clung to Sed’s bare chest with her fingertips to keep from tumbling to the asphalt on her head.

Brian’s angry face appeared upside down above her. “What the f**k are you two doing?”

Sed’s arms wrapped around Myrna’s body. “What does it look like?” His lips brushed over her jaw. “Oh yeah, Myrna. Yeah. Don’t stop now, baby.”

“I can’t believe this.” Brian tore his gaze from Sed long enough to glare at Myrna. “I leave you two alone for ten seconds and you’re already—”

“You think I’m cheating on you?” Myrna sputtered.

She crawled over Sed’s massive body and out of the car, landing gracelessly on the ground at Brian’s feet.

“You’ve got your hands all over his naked chest, all submissive in his arms and he’s kissing you. What do you expect me to think?”

Myrna scrambled to her feet and shook her head at him. “I can’t f*****g believe this, Brian. You’re just like my ex-husband.”

When he reached for her, she shoved him aside and stormed away.

***

Still reeling from an eyeful he’d thought he’d never have to see again (Sed with his hands all over a woman he cared about), Brian watched Myrna stomp up the bus stairs. He couldn’t believe she’d compared him to her psychotic ex-husband. Did she really think he was like that asshole?

Inside the bus Eric called, “Hey, Myrna, Jace said he’ll clean the fridge all by himself. So you can get started cooking those pork chops. I rescued my special cinnamon and dill rub from the garbage.” A loud crash of cookware followed. “Don’t cry. You don’t have to use it if you don’t want to.”

Brian started after Myrna, but Sed grabbed his arm. “Dude, learn to take a joke.”

“A joke?”

“Yeah, I was just playing around. Teasing her. Myrna and I weren’t doing anything. She’s not like those other bimbos you called girlfriends. You can trust her.”

“I did trust her. And then you… you were touching her, and looking at her, and your lips, and her hands, and… she wasn’t even trying to stop you…” His eyes landed on Sed’s bare chest. “Go put on a goddamned shirt, Sed!”

Brian took a deep breath. He knew he had overreacted, but he also knew what Sed was like. He turned good girls bad. But Myrna wasn’t a girl. She was a woman. Somewhere inside, he knew she would never betray him with Sed. She wasn’t like the others. It wasn’t her he didn’t trust. It was Sed. “s**t. I’ve got to go talk to her.”

Brian found her in the living area with Jace and Eric, stuffing dirty clothes into a garbage bag. She had a streak of mascara under one eye. He hadn’t meant to make her cry.

“Myrna, I didn’t mean to accuse you—”

“Go help Trey unload the car, Brian. I don’t want to talk about this right now.” He touched her arm and she flinched away from him. “Don’t even think about touching me.”

“Sed told me there was nothing going on.”

“So you’ll believe Sed, but automatically think the worst of me?”

“No, I just… it looked like… Sed’s done this to me so many times, and…” He rubbed his forehead. He couldn’t concentrate. The thought of losing her ate the inside of his chest raw.

Eric grabbed Myrna and shoved her against Brian’s chest. “Kiss and make up.”

“I think he should squirm a little longer,” Myrna said, but she didn’t move away. Not even when Brian’s arms crept up to circle her back. “He knows how much I hate being falsely accused of cheating.”

“I never actually accused… But I shouldn’t have even thought it. I’m sorry, okay?”

“Okay.”

He breathed a sigh of relief. “Okay?”

“Yeah, I overreacted. A little.”

Brian kissed her forehead and squeezed her tighter, inching her body toward the bedroom. “Can we go make up now?”

She laughed and hugged him. “We need to go get this laundry done.”

“We could always make up on the washing machine at the laundromat.”

She leaned back and looked up at him, adventure sparkling in her gorgeous, green-flecked eyes. “Yeah, we could.”

God, he loved this woman. If Sed touched her again, he would kill him.

Myrna shook her head at Brian. “We’ve been through this a hundred times. I’m not staying in L.A. with you.”

“You can get your work done while we’re rehearsing and in the recording studio,” he said. “And we have a music video shoot in a couple of days. You can use that entire day to work.”

Lounging on his back in one of the curtained bunks, Brian trailed his fingers lightly over her bare shoulder, tracing the spaghetti strap of her satin nightgown. She lay on his belly, her folded arms on his chest and her chin resting on her interlaced fingers. She stared up at his face, which was mostly concealed in shadows, contemplating her options. He’d been wearing her down for almost a week, and as much as she wanted to have fun with him, she knew she had to use this opportunity to get caught up on her work.

“You know if I stay, I’ll want to watch everything you do. You’re too much of a distraction. Besides, it’s only a week. It won’t kill us to be apart for seven days.”

“We’ve been together almost every moment of every day for three weeks. Seven days apart will feel like an eternity.”

“You know what they say. Absence makes the heart grow fonder.”

“If my heart grows any fonder, it’s going to hop out of my chest and into yours.”

She melted. She scooted up his body to kiss him. “That’s the sweetest thing anyone’s ever said to me.”

“It sounds sort of fatal,” he murmured.

“Then I don’t want your heart to grow any fonder.” She kissed him again and rolled toward the wall.

“Don’t think just because you’re being stubborn you’ll get out of meeting my parents,” he said. “They’ll be at the show tomorrow night.”

She sat up, her head inches from crashing into the ceiling. “What?”

“They always come to our show in L.A. Trey’s parents. Sed’s parents. They’ll probably all be there. It’s like an elementary school Christmas program all over again.”

“Do they know about me?” she asked, her voice uncharacteristically squeaky.

“Yeah, they know. Mom’s a great ear when I’m bummed out. And believe me, that entire month I didn’t see you after Des Moines qualified.”

“What did you tell her?” When he opened his mouth to speak, she covered it with her hand. “Wait. I don’t want to know.”

She squirmed over his body and dropped out of the bunk. He caught her arm. “Where are you going?”

“I need a drink.” She turned and found Eric, Sed, and Jace staring at her from the spotlessly clean living area where they sat watching TV. She instinctively tugged her baby doll nightgown down her thighs to make sure everything was covered and went directly to the refrigerator. Unfortunately, what she wanted was on the other bus.

“Why isn’t there any alcohol on this bus?” she yelled and slammed the refrigerator door.

The guys on the sofa laughed at her dilemma.

“I don’t know, Myr,” Sed called. “Why is that?”

Eric climbed to his feet, swaying slightly as the bus decelerated and then sped back up. He stopped next to her, reached into his leather vest and withdrew a silver flask. “Tequila?” He opened the flask and extended it toward her. The fumes made her eyes cross.

“You mean To-Kill-Ya?” She snatched the flask out of his hand and took a long drink. She sputtered and coughed, her eyes watering, stomach protesting. She handed the flask back to him, shaking her head with her eyes closed. “That is some nasty stuff.”

“The drunker you get, the better it tastes.” He took a swig and recapped it.

Brian appeared at her elbow. “You’re drinking?”

“So?”

“I really don’t get why meeting my parents is such a big deal.”

“Brian’s mom is a total MILF,” Eric said. “And his dad is a living legend. Brian’s parents are way cool.”

“I’m sure they are, but meeting his parents would suggest Brian and I are pretty serious.”

“Yeah, so?” Eric said.

“So that gives the wrong message. Brian and I are—”

“Just having a good time,” Brian finished her sentence.

“Exactly,” she said. “Thank you.”

“If you don’t like parents, you can ‘just have a good time’ with me,” Eric said. “I don’t have any parents.”

“You don’t?”

He shook his head. “I’m a product of the fine state of California’s foster care program.”

She gave Eric a warm hug. He tugged her closer, his jaw resting against her hair. “I love sympathy hugs,” he murmured, and then his hands slid over her satin nightgown from her lower back to her ass.

She elbowed her way out of his grip. “Is it possible for you not to cop a feel when I’m within reach?”

“I take opportunities when they present themselves.”

She glanced at Brian, who was scowling at her.

“Don’t get mad at me,” she said, “that was him.”

“Why do you get to call all the shots in this relationship?” he asked.

“Huh?”

“Because you’re p***y-whipped.” Eric retreated to the living area before Brian took out his frustration on him.

“I’m always the one compromising what I want,” Brian said, his voice raised in anger.

“I compromise.”

“That’s bullshit, Myrna. Name one thing you’ve done that you didn’t want to do. One compromise you made because I asked you.”

“I’m always putting off work I need to do for you.”

“I don’t ask you to.”

“Yes, you do. All the time. As soon as I start working, you show up wanting sex.”

“You can say no. I don’t force you to do anything you don’t want to do.”

“And how would you react if I said no?”

“I’m not sure. I’ve never had to deal with that situation.”

Myrna was stunned speechless. Was he insinuating what she thought he was?

“That’s because Myrna is d**k-whipped.” Eric hid behind a sofa pillow.

“Well, what compromises have you made?” Myrna countered, unable to argue his logic. She didn’t ever say no to him. She didn’t want to.

“This entire relationship is a compromise for me.”

Sed increased the volume of the TV.

Brian talked louder. “I want to tell you how I feel. I want this to be serious. I want to introduce you to my parents. I want this to be permanent and about more than s*x. I know this is hard for you, but it’s hard for me, too. Don’t you get that? I’m not sure how much more of this I can take.”

“Then don’t take it,” she said. “Walk away.” She flicked her hands at him as if showing him the door.

She never expected him to turn his back and close himself in the bedroom. Her first instinct was to chase after him. That’s what she wanted to do, but she knew she couldn’t do that. She had to stick to her guns or things would get serious between them and she didn’t want that. Right? No, that would be horrible. Then he’d start with the stupid marriage proposals again.

“You really blew it this time, Myr,” Eric called over the blaring TV.

“Shut up, Eric.” She stood there indecisively for a moment, wondering why she felt like crying. If this “thing” didn’t work out between her and Brian, it was for the best. Right? Yeah, for the best.

She dashed a tear from the corner of her eye and settled into the booth around the dining table. She sat on the opposite side she usually did, with her back to the living area and facing the bedroom. She didn’t want the distraction of the guys watching TV while she entered her stupid data into her stupid spreadsheet. At least, that’s what she told herself as she booted up her stupid computer with one eye on the bedroom door.

Around three in the morning, Brian stumbled out of the bedroom in search of the bathroom. He hadn’t been asleep long. His brain wouldn’t shut up long enough for him to drift off, and then Trey kept cuddling up against him, which made for unpleasant sleeping arrangements. He paused in the doorway. Myrna had fallen asleep at her computer, her head resting on a stack of questionnaires. The others on the bus had retired to their bunks. He didn’t know why he should care if she was uncomfortable sleeping on her ever-important work. She obviously didn’t give a s**t about him or his feelings. She hadn’t even tried to make up with him after their argument. He had to come to terms with the fact that she only wanted him for one thing. And he didn’t think he could settle for that any more.

After he finished in the bathroom, he headed back for bed. His conscience getting the better of him, he went to the booth and drew Myrna towards him. He’d just toss her in the empty bunk so she didn’t wake up with a huge crick in her neck.

“No,” she groaned, still asleep. “Gotta get this data entered so I can stay with Brian in L.A.”

He smiled and kissed her temple. Yeah, she obviously didn’t care about him at all. He just had to be patient with her. It was just so hard to have everything he wanted pressed against him but not be able to claim her as his forever.

He lifted Myrna and carried her past the empty bunk and into the bedroom. He laid her on the bed next to Trey and climbed in on her other side.

“Slumber party,” Trey murmured and snuggled up against Myrna. Mr. Cuddles was a total bed hog. But was it really necessary for him to massage Myrna’s breast like that? Brian thought not. He grabbed Trey’s finger and bent it back until he cried out in pain.

Myrna scowled in her sleep.

“Hands off, Mills.”

Trey sighed heavily and rolled onto his other side. “Party pooper.”

Myrna opened her eyes and blinked in the bright morning sunshine. When her eyes adjusted to the light, she found Brian sleeping beside her. She wasn’t sure how she ended up in bed with him, but she was grateful to find him so close. It made it easier to apologize. She should have done it last night.

She lifted her hand to touch his face.

His eyes fluttered open and he smiled. “Good morning, beautiful.”

“Oh Brian,” she murmured, her eyes strangely watery. “I’m sorry about last night. And I’m sorry I’m not more available for you. You’re always so good to me and I just can’t bring myself to…” She shook her head. “But I do want to compromise. So if you still want me to stay with you in L.A., I promise to hang around a couple of days and do anything you want before I go home to get caught up on work. How does that sound?”

He kissed her nose and smiled. “Like a compromise.”

“I’ll try to be better about finding middle ground.”

“And I’ll try to be more patient.”

“That biblical Job guy ain’t got nothing on you, sweetie.” She stroked his hair from his cheek. “I don’t know how you put up with me.”

“I think you do,” he said, “but I’ve been forbidden to say it.”

Her heart thrummed in her chest and she covered his lips with her fingertips before he let that blasted l-word slip.

A hard, warm body plastered itself to Myrna’s back. She stiffened and held her breath. They weren’t alone? Within seconds, the man had splayed his hand over her belly, intertwined his bare legs with hers and buried his face in her neck.

Brian chuckled. “Mr. Cuddles strikes again.”

“Soft,” Trey murmured in her ear. He snuggled closer.

Just Trey. She emitted her held breath and relaxed. Trey snuggled closer still.

“Don’t let him smother you,” Brian advised.

“I don’t think I can move.”

“Shhhh,” Trey murmured, his nose pressed behind her ear. “Sleeping.”

Brian chuckled and shook his head. “You might as well go back to sleep. He won’t move for a while.”

Myrna wasn’t sure how anyone could be expected to sleep when sandwiched between two sexy guitarists.

Why was she so nervous? They were just parents. Yes, one of them was Malcolm O’Neil, but that shouldn’t make her tummy flutter or her palms sweat.

“Are you okay?” Brian asked.

“Fine,” she squeaked.

“Don’t be nervous. They’ll love you.”

The mood backstage was more sedate than usual, with scarcely a scantily clad woman to be found. Brian opened the dressing room door and ushered Myrna inside. The instant Brian stepped into the room, a stunning woman grabbed him in a crushing hug and kissed him square on the mouth.

“Excuse me,” Myrna said crossly.

“Mom,” Brian gasped. “Can’t breathe.”

“I don’t see you for two months and you greet me with ‘can’t breathe’?”

He gave his mom a hug that lifted her feet off the ground. She laughed.

“Put your mother down,” a deep voice said behind Myrna.