The Witches Alpha

LET'S TALK

Lets Talk

Isaiah’s View

Of course that mutt hands me back control when she wants to talk—I'm better at listening—sure you are- She has no idea what that little spanking did to us. The way she reddened under my hand, the slight blush on her cheeks, the warmth, and how wet her p***y got had my c**k twitching in response. Gavin said she smelled different, changed somehow but he wont tell me what it is. I guess she deserves an explanation as to why I have been acting the way I have. I just don't want her to hate me or not want me anymore–She won't mate will understand more than you know-how can you be so sure if we become completely vulnerable with her she won't reject us- she won't- she is not like Caroline-how can we be sure-just open up and trust her-how do we know she isn't faking the mate bond like she did-how can you be sure its not another spell-it isn't it feels different i think you know that too and that's why your so scared- just trust mate and open up and do it now your being rude again and i don't wanna have to spank mate again for disrespecting us- sure you don't .

I guess I owe you an explanation-that's an understatement-i am trying to be nice you can hold the snide comments to yourself-okay okay-just hold judgment until the end okay-okay I am listening. So it's not a secret in my pact how I feel about mates. How my parents have raised me to feel about destined mates. But somehow i have- had held out hope that it was nothing like they said. That you would become a slave to your emotions and be controlled by someone manipulative. That they would be your biggest weakness. That you would be forced to accept the good and bad and even when they hurt you you would be unable to break away from the chains that bound you. That you would drown in your own despair. Whereas with chosen mates you can control how much you feel, how much you accept or not. That with a chosen mate you would be able to choose. I met Caroline and I thought she was my fated mate because of a spell. At the time I didn't know that and I had to deal with everything my parents said fated mates went through. I had to deal with the cheating, feeling my mate mate with another. I had to deal with her not wanting to be marked because I wasn't enough. I was told I was weak for being kind and considerate to my pack members. Weak because I paid omegas and treated them like they were-are human. The fact that I paid them and let them rise in the ranks if they wanted to. The fact that I let women train. I became cruel. I stopped paying the omegas, stopped letting the women train and made them do things that were appropriate for women. I was blind to how cruel she was to every one and handed out punishments to those who didn't deserve it. I know I was under a spell but the spell she used brings out parts of oneself that already exist. So i have to ask myself am i really that cruel, i hurt my pack and i am supposed to protect it. My pack has never been the same since. Yes I have put things back to what they were but the pack still fears if i can go back to what it was. What kind of Alpha am i that i let a spell cloud my judgment. That's why i didn't want a mate ever because a mate brings out the worst in me not the best. What's worse is if she had not fallen in love with me, or so she says, she would have never broken the spell and everything would be the same . I wasn't strong enough to break the spell on my own. We know someone sent her, we just don't know who. But I have my suspicions that it may be my own mother and father. I know this doesn't excuse my behavior to you and I hope you can find it in your heart to forgive me. If you want to reject me I understand but when I couldn't find you I was terrified and wanted nothing but to hold you and get you to see me. The real me, not who I have to be in front of others.

Rinas View

I watch this man spill his heart to me. Telling me his biggest mistake in life and all I feel is sympathy for him. I understand now why he acts the way he does. Why is he hot and cold? I want to kill that b***h for hurting him so much. I can tell from his story that he is a great man and a great alpha. I just wish he would see it and not continue to blame himself. I have my suspicions that the pack has already forgiven their alpha understanding that his actions were out of his control but that he has to forgive himself. I watch as tears leak down his face silently and the anger and sorrow in his eyes. My heart aches for him and I grab his hands. Listen, no it doesn't excuse you but it explains your reasons why and i forgive you. No, I am not going to reject you but you have to promise to always be honest with me. Don't close yourself off to me and keep open communication with me. You still want me after everything i told you, everything i did- it's not your fault zay and you have to forgive yourself. You are not weak because you treat others with kindness nor are you weak for not breaking a spell. Everyone has a little darkness in them. It's the choices we make that make a difference in our character. I know i haven't known you long but i doubt you would do anything you did during the spell willingly which is why you needed to be under one in the first place. Thank you my beautiful mate, you wont regret giving us a second chance- I better not, i don't give too many chances often.

Listen, I am not perfect. I have done my fair share of bad things as well. I grew up hating myself and the ones that raised me. My family, the father that was never there. It made me bitter and cruel to some things. It also made me ignore things I shouldn't have and allow things that should have never happened. All I ever wanted was to be loved fully , accepted and not judged. I didn't want to feel like I had to lie to be loved or be accepted because who would accept the real me. The broken pieces of who I am. The imperfections. The insecurities I have about myself. Yes everyone says i am beautiful but they don't see the ugly scars i have. They don't see the mistakes I have made. The lies I have told. They don't see the real me, just the version of me I allow them to. How do I know if I let you really see me you wont run. That you will still fully love me. I would never judge you my Princess you say that now but i have done alot im not proud of lies that didn't need to be told but i told so i could feel loved be accepted even though it went against my morals. I have been selfish. I have been given choices and I still choose wrong no spell. So whos worst you or me at least you were under a spell. I hurt others and made these decisions without one. So who's the real monster?